Why do you always learn stuff you never knew before?

You grow up in the same house, stay in touch via phone and iMessage, and then you get together…

And they drop a bomb.

You’ve got the whole world organized in your mind, the past is clear, it’s the future you’re concerned with, and then you hear a story and…

I spoke with my father the night he died. He had his hearing aids out, he could barely hear, he was scared, and then he passed. Or at least I thought so. Tonight my older sister said my mother’s best friend Selma called her in the middle of the night to ask if it was all right to pull the plug. Huh? Turns out his heart had stopped and he was brain dead. Now, of course, if his heart had truly stopped he’d already be gone, but when the stories are decades old you can never get down to the nitty-gritty. But my mother confirmed the story, it was true.

My mother is 91. She’s still here. But she’s pissed. She’s handicapped and feels like a burden to her friends. I asked how she’d feel if she went to sleep and didn’t wake up. She was fine with it. Which spooked me. Especially since I have so much left I want to do, to live for. But the weird thing about getting older is you go through changes and you no longer care. The people my age are either running the company or retired. And I can’t imagine the latter, but you get to the point where the game no longer interests you, you’ve seen too much, and you want to remove yourself.

So my whole family is in town for the Seder. Four generations. Jews and non-Jews alike. And my brother-in-law is leading the Seder and it occurs to me…

I’d do it a different way. I’d read every page, I want to hit the high points, not only the plagues and Dayenu, but the explanations. It seemed interminable growing up, but now it roots me. Hell, we’ve even finished the Seder a few times recently, which never happened way back when.

And he didn’t believe in passing the baton, having each attendee read a section, so I’m sitting there at the table thinking…

How when the Seder happened in Connecticut the weather had turned, baseball season had begun, this was when we not only watched, but played, I lived for Little League.

And in a good season there was still some skiing left. Although you had to drive to Vermont to do it.

But it was definitely spring. Which means so much on the east coast. It’s a rebirth, a beginning, you congratulate yourself you made it through the winter.

But I missed the winter, with my pemphigus, I want to hold back the change of seasons, it’s been in the seventies in L.A. all week, it’s positively scary, soon it will be festival season, where does the time go?

We used to look forward to drinking the Manischewitz, getting high from the wine in our paper cups. Now I abstain from all alcohol.

I still don’t eat the jello mold, I don’t get that whatsoever.

But the chicken soup! I doubled-down on that, no gefilte fish for me.

And you sit there as the people banter and you realize who you are. What made you you. And you don’t exactly like it.

I mean it’s hard to believe I spent so many years growing up with these people, in the same damn abode. Being pushed around and misunderstood. The shrink asks why I don’t ask twice, it’s because in my family no meant no, and you didn’t want to bug someone for fear of reprisals.

And you think about being a prisoner without options. All the things you wanted to do, but couldn’t. You didn’t have wheels, you had to convince your parents.

Whereas now you can come and go as you please. But to a great degree you don’t. And as the cacophony rises you wonder what’s best. To be right alone or be a member of the group, albeit one with sharp elbows.

Some people never change. Their foibles get in their way forevermore, they cannot see another path.

You learn bits and pieces that fill in the holes, that make the stories all make sense.

You make sure to talk to everybody because you never know if they’ll be there next year.

And you think about not only your Seders past, but those of generations before you. When intermarriage was a no-no and Jews were abused but surviving. Now a cushy life and intermarriage has Judaism in jeopardy, but that does not mean the gentiles still don’t hate us.

And you try to explain to people how it works. The self-denigration, the low expectations, the belief that you’re lucky, privileged to be here. The insults, the stepping over each other in conversation. Hell, one thing Jews do is talk, that’s what was unfathomable at Middlebury, so many people had nothing to say, or thought about it before they did. Jews speak and think later.

And this is all going through my head as I hear about the foibles and missteps and choices of family members I was blissfully unaware of previously. I lay in bed last night unable to fall asleep, trying to put the pieces together again.

Once upon a time I had answers.

Now I only have questions.

NEVER PROMOTE BEFORE AVAILABILITY

You’re lucky if someone’s noticed, if they’re aware of what you’re advertising/promoting, in a world of endless messages once you’ve got someone hooked you need to allow them to click through freely to purchase/experience your wares, this is why Amazon introduced One Click shopping. You want to reduce friction, you want instinct to take over, once someone thinks about spending their money or not, you’re lost.

NO ONE’S GONNA REMEMBER

Which is why if you’re a known quantity you want your publicity front-loaded and if you’re unknown you want to wait until you have traction. If you’re someone and your new project doesn’t come out of the gate roaring, it’s a stiff, and no amount of sycophantic old media press will resuscitate it. If you’re no one, the instinct is to promote to overcome ignorance, this is a mistake, you waste your budget, you burn your relationships and everyone is frustrated and depleted. Now, more than ever, you start small and develop a story. You’re selling the story, not the project. That’s what hooks people in today’s cacophonous society. Not information so much as ANALYSIS! We all see the headlines, but we rarely go beyond that. We do when there’s a genuine hook. A real hook is not “This is my latest project, it’s the best one I’ve ever done and let me tell you about my favorite color.” Nor is it the classic “I’ve experienced tragedy and I’ve distilled it into this work.” No, it’s more about the reaction of the audience, your experience in slogging it out to get ahead. Where you won over the audience, where you didn’t. Ink without story is worthless, there’s just too much of it. And only a few may actually read, but those people will be bonded to you and spread the word. You’re not speaking to everybody, just somebody. Broadcasting is passe, just look at TV ratings, you’re narrowcasting.

ATTENTION IS EVANESCENT

Just because you’ve got ’em today doesn’t mean you’ve got ’em tomorrow. In a world where what happens in the morning is already passe by the evening you’ve got to keep the story rolling, you need new product, more music, more YouTube clips… You satiate the core and when the looky-loos finally come on board there’s a plethora for them to experience,

ATTENTION IS OFTENTIMES QUANTIFIABLE

There are no turntable hits. You check the Spotify streams and the YouTube count and if’s not reacting forget about it. Never lie, people can check the truth instantly, and then you’re dead in the water forevermore.

THE PUBLIC IS IN CONTROL

Never ever try to bend people’s will, follow them, or get ahead of them in unknown territory, which is how Spotify won, people didn’t even know they wanted streaming. We live in an on demand culture. Put up hurdles at your peril.

GIVE UP THE GHOST

Spielberg believes movies must open in a theatre. Yeah right, so they can be ignored there and forgotten when they hit the small screen. Be thrilled anybody’s watching/listening to your stuff at all. When someone starts speaking about protection, stop listening. Windows are impediments. Critics have been superseded by the wisdom of the crowd. The music business woke up, the holier-than-thou movie business is way behind the curve, as are network and cable television. Sure, it’s about the content, but if it’s not easy to consume whenever and wherever I want, I’m not watching.

DISTRIBUTION IS KING

Think about the outlet. If you’ve got a choice, sacrifice payment for eyeballs. You don’t want to be the guinea pig at Apple television, no matter how much they pay.

OLD MEDIA IS A CIRCLE JERK

Everybody involved is backslapping, believing they’re fighting the good fight, when the audience has completely tuned out. Youngsters don’t read the newspaper. And they go straight to rottentomatoes, as do I, why should I waste my time, which is so precious!

YOU’RE A HIT OR YOU’RE NOT

Fewer projects are ubiquitous and ubiquity ain’t what it used to be. If you don’t hit right away, give up or be in it for the long haul. No one wants to listen to your sour grapes.

MONEY GROWS ON TREES

That’s right, there are so many ways to monetize success that to get hung up on the old ones is a major mistake. The biggest rappers give away their music. People buy merch they don’t wear or play, just to feel involved.

YOU’RE BUILDING A BOND

Be human, have frailties, whether it be in your art or personality or both. Rough edges hook people. Which is why “The Voice” stars never translate to Spotify. We’re looking for vulnerability, originality, we want to identify. Plastic surgery just makes you look like everybody else. Stop feeling inadequate, own who you are, it will pay dividends.

Tune in for the Bon Jovi stories.

Be wowed by Irving Azoff’s skills as host.

This Sirius XM Volume series is a result of a coin flip, in negotiations for music rights Irving said he’d do it if he lost, and he did, and ergo this initial session recorded at his house on the eve of the Pollstar conference with him, Jon, Rob Light and Judd Apatow.

The funniest story is the one where Bon Jovi asks Howard Stern to induct his band into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Dedicated Sternophiles have heard Howard’s version, but the inside iteration is so much better. Jon’s bugging Howard to connect in person and Stern is caught between wanting to come through and not wanting to get together at all. Furthermore, he’s worried what this is about, is Jon sick or something? The ultimate rendezvous happens outside Howard’s shrink’s office, by the side door. Where the two men converse astride their respective rides like a Mafia meeting.

And then Irving e-mails Stern and tells him the gig is in Cleveland!

We love these inside stories, we drool over them, and we think we know them…

But there’s so much left unsaid.

Meanwhile, in one fell swoop Jon Bon Jovi rehabilitates his image, become human, scrapes away all the b.s. of the past decades. He’s mortal, with insecurities. He talks about feeling infallible at the Super Bowl during the height of his fame, when he’s sitting in the stands and Garth Brooks punts and he’s asked to sing the National Anthem. He says SURE! But he wonders if he’d do it today. He wonders where that kid WENT!

That’s why we listen to people’s stories, for the humanity, to feel connected, to know we’re not the only one confounded by this thing called life.

And Jon talks about the Gorillaz being the biggest band in his household. Giving the U.K. act a bigger plug than they’ve ever gotten stateside, almost makes you want to fire up their music and see what it’s all about.

And when he talks about giving away 80,000 free meals at his Soul Kitchens, how there are no prices and you can either volunteer or pay what you want, you feel warm towards him, he’s not trading on his good works, he’s just doing what he feels in his heart.

Not that he’s as dynamic as Irving…

Thinking on your feet ain’t easy. Public speaking ain’t easy. Being a host means you not only have to talk, but guide the conversation.

And with no preparation Irving’s a pro. Evidencing his intelligence and humor and if you don’t know the man, you’ll be exposed to his truth, this is not Orson Welles in “The Muppet Movie,” an imposing holier-than-thou behemoth, but someone friendly and smart who you want to hang out with, someone who can laugh at himself while revealing truth.

Most people don’t get the chance. This is how Irving really is. I’m not saying he can’t explode, that’s a club in his bag, but you win more when you’re friends and you create a win-win, aware, of course, of what your advantages are.

As for Judd Apatow…he’s outmatched by the music people. Judd is almost an afterthought, but when he brings up Warren Zevon…

He asks Warren about writing music for his film, but says he’s got to wait for the studio’s notes. NOTES? WE DON’T NEED NO STINKIN’ NOTES!

That’s why classic rock was. That’s why it sustained. They wrestled the power from the labels, from the suits, and they didn’t give it back until MTV made it all about image and the money eclipsed the art. That’s a rock star, someone who has to do it his way.

And Rob Light adds color, giving insight into how live has gone from second class citizen to dominant player, because of the raw connection, because it reminds you who you were and forever more shall be, but the glue here is…

Irving.

You’d listen to him talk to ANYBODY! He’s more dynamic than Bon Jovi, even though it’s Jon who sings to stadiums.

And that comes up too, the power of the stage. The love, the feedback, being able to manipulate people. The influence.

That’s the power of rock and roll.

And Irving won’t denigrate the new acts.

But he’s wistful about the old ones. And everybody agrees, their kids stream the classic rock.

And unlike a movie, unlike standup, you get on stage and sing your greatest hits and…

The audience is no longer livin’ on a prayer, they’ve taken the bad medicine and are thrilled you’re there for them.

So lay your hands on Sirius XM’s Volume channel.

You’re gonna dig this.

How Grammy Nominee Brent Faiyaz Built His Music Career Off Streaming

“It was never about the money, it was always about the terms.”

Ain’t this a change from the forties and fifties, even sixties, when you were paid off in Cadillacs and there was little transparency, never mind having a bottom of the barrel royalty rate.

Ain’t this a change from the eighties and nineties, wherein superstars demanded big advances, not trusting the label to ever account accurately to them.

Those are ancient paradigms the major label system is still stuck on. If it weren’t for their catalogs, they’d have been eclipsed. But after taking more of the artist’s pie with their 360 deals the tide has turned, credit streaming, credit accurate data, the artists are demanding MORE!

Vice News is incredible, but it’s behind a paywall on HBO and the branded channel has gotten little traction. This is another paradigm change, Netflix has a multiple of the number of subscribers of HBO and it’s built on an on demand model, whereas HBO is positively ancient, you’re supposed to tune in at a specific time, what are we living in the twentieth century?

No, the twenty first, deep into the second decade, in an era where information is too plentiful and it’s hard to get your message heard. Despite all the e-mail lists of articles to read, none of them hipped me to this video, I got it from a reader, proving once again it’s all personal, it’s who you know, what they tell you, are you trusted.

So, what you’ve got here is genius, and almost nobody knows about it.

You’ve got an act inspired by Chance, the Curt Flood of the music business, to do it his way, to pass up the easy money and do the hard work for the rewards.

And the astounding thing is…THE MUSIC IS GOOD!

I always cross-reference the data. I immediately went to Spotify and checked the play counts. And the ten most popular cuts were all over a million, in some cases significantly, so I played them.

It was R&B. Brent Faiyaz used to be a rapper, now he’s a singer, and the world is his oyster, if he can make people aware of himself. This is the kind of music you can play at a dinner party, when you’re making love, when you’re lazing on a Sunday afternoon.

Now would it be bigger if it were on a major?

I’M NOT SURE!

The active audience is all hip-hop, as are the radio stations, this kind of music takes longer to percolate, take hold, but with acts like Sade it lasts longer. But Sade was the beneficiary of MTV.

But Brent Faiyaz is the beneficiary of STREAMING!

Your eyes will bug out when you read how his manager utilizes the FREE tools/data from Spotify to target both touring and ads. The business has become more sophisticated, the old shotgun approach doesn’t work, it certainly isn’t cost-effective.

Videos like this get one excited about the future of the music business.

Assuming you see them.

Brent Faiyaz – Spotify playlist