I thought it was a foreign movie.

I used to consider the Oscars religion. Until one night in Utah I was unable to watch and ever since then I haven’t. Except for that one night during Covid when they held them at the train station. I wanted to see how that played out.

As for reviews… I don’t read them. Because they tell you the plot of the entire film. I want to enter something fresh.

All of which means as the years have ensued I’ve paid less and less attention to the movie business (I wasn’t interested in comic books as a kid, never mind comic book movies as an adult) and have focused all my attention on streaming television series.

However, the elite discussion, the reviews, continue to be about film, when all the action is in extended opuses. We learned this with “The Sopranos,” which was superior to anything in the theatre.

As for the moviegoing experience…I hate it. First and foremost because of the hassle, I’ve got to get there and the films don’t start when I want them to. Am I the only person who is time-challenged? I need a whole ‘nother life just to consume art.

Felice wanted to watch a standup.

I could cotton to comedy, but desired something with plot.

And “Anora” was billed as a comedy/drama. Which I guess it is. But it was not what I was expecting.

You see “Anora” is now on Hulu. Just a click away.

And I remembered it was nominated for Best Picture, I couldn’t remember who won, but we started to watch it and I asked myself…

WHERE ARE THE SUBTITLES?

Oh, they come a bit into the movie, when Russian is spoken. But it wasn’t long before I realized “Anora” was an American production. Because of the locale, if nothing else.

Oh, there are strip clubs all over the world, and I’ve seen foreign series where they’ve played a big part, but when they showed Anora’s residence right back up against the train tracks, this was clearly New York.

Now your mind won’t drift when you watch “Anora.”

And I’d love to tell you the movie is fantastic, it is not, but it’s definitely very good.

One thing that comes clear as you’re watching is this is the kind of movie Hollywood used to specialize in, prior to the blockbusters of “Jaws” and “Star Wars,” never mind the Marvel movies. There are none of the usual tropes…the car chases, the shoot-’em-ups, no, “Anora” is original.

And I did not recognize Mikey Madison from “Better Things.” Which never got its due because it was on a secondary cable channel and the public was not primed for this and…

Madison as Ani/Anora is almost scary. She’s a stripper, but I wouldn’t say she’s got a heart of gold. On one level she’s desperate. On another, it’s all about the Benjamins, it’s great to watch her negotiate.

Furthermore, “Anora” gets the strip club reality down pat. The customers are marks. The strippers feign interest for dollars. If you don’t know someone who was convinced that a stripper truly loved them, that they’d made a connection which would survive outside the club, you’ve never met a man who went to a strip club.

But Ani/Mikey has got a code. Which she will not waver from. And she will speak truth to power all day long. Because when you’ve got nothing to lose, why not?

And then there’s Karren Karagulian as Toros, the desperate priest.

Boy do they nail this. Everybody’s got to serve somebody, and Toros serves the Zakharovs back in Russia. And if he doesn’t get it right, if he doesn’t deliver, he doesn’t even want to contemplate the consequences.

As a result, Toros doesn’t care about collateral damage. Middle class denizens consider the law, the cost of items, Toros is above all that, because he knows that the law is no competition for the criminals he reports to and everything is replaceable, especially when you’re an oligarch.

So deep down inside Ani/Mikey is looking for a way out, and when she finds it she will not let go. Ultimately she does what is expedient, she’s got no choice, but up to the last minute she’s willing to give the middle finger to those who treat her wrong.

As for twenty one year old Ivan Zakharov… She puts her faith in him. But who can you trust? Are the underclass just playthings for the rich?

Now a truly great film has you wondering when it’s done. Pondering the deeper meaning. But I didn’t quite feel that.

However, “Anora” is a great ride. Vivid.

But I wish it was a series, because I wanted more backstory, more character development.

And if it had premiered on Netflix…

The press is as out of touch with entertainment as it is with politics. The press can’t deal with a show that’s available all at once, they need something dripped out. Every week we’ve got to read about the latest episode of “Last of Us” when there are series on Netflix that far eclipse it in viewership and quality. Ditto with “White Lotus” and “Adolescence,” which is the number one visual entertainment of the year so far.

And “Anora” is not “Adolescence,” which you can’t stop thinking about.

Then again, many more people saw “Adolescence.”

“Anora” may have won Best Picture at the Oscars, but it was only number 65 in last year’s worldwide gross. It made $59,732,509, of which two-thirds was foreign: $39,258,214. America is sliding in so many ways, the rest of the world can appreciate something deeper, whereas everything in America must be a two-dimensional cartoon.

But if “Anora” had premiered on Netflix, more people would have seen it. And that’s the ultimate goal. Don’t let anybody tell you otherwise. You want to become part ot the conversation, part of the ongoing fabric of the country as opposed to being a blip on the radar screen.

Now you only get one bite at the apple when it comes to attention. There are exceptions, but they are rare. Not one person has e-mailed me about “Anora” since it appeared on Hulu. No one is talking about it. But everybody but the press was talking about “Adolescence” right after it launched (the press caught on eventually, but didn’t know how to continue the story, not in the U.S., whereas in the U.K. “Adolescence” impacted the culture at large, there was discussion over whether laws should be changed).

So on one level, “Anora” is a darker “Hangover.” With elements of drama, like “Silver Linings Playbook.”

But there’s a grit and a truth in “Anora” that is absent from those box office successes. The nudity is not superfluous, it’s the way it is, you’ve been there. And Mikey Madison does not seem concerned with negative implications regarding her career in the future. Play hide and seek and Mr. Skin is all over you. Let it all hang out and it’s not so special.

I don’t want to be one of those wankers who reveals the plot points and ruins the movie. But you should definitely watch “Anora.” If for no other reason than to see this is what Hollywood reveres but doesn’t make anymore, it hearkens back to what once was.

But even more for the raw experience. The ride. Which is the essence of every great work of art, even if it’s more cerebral than action.

“Anora” has a visceral quality absent from almost all of today’s successful productions. It all goes swimmingly until you can feel the edge, become engrossed with the edge. And the battle between Anora’s fellow stripper, that’s life in a nutshell. You’re fighting petty little wars with someone at your level who the rest of the world does not give a damn about.

So if you have Hulu, watch “Anora.”

If you don’t… They’re selling great bundles with Disney+, Max and Hulu right now.

Very few people will pay the price of a month of streaming to see one movie before it’s available as part of a subscription. Either you go to the theatre, which most people can resist, or you wait until it’s part of a service you already pay for.

And the dirty little secret is by time it’s streaming…you usually don’t care, there’s something else you want to watch.

But you should watch “Anora.”

We tend to think life has an on/off switch. You’re either alive or your dead. But it rarely goes down that way.

We thought our classic rock stars were forever. Until they weren’t. They were going to go on tour, maybe walking and playing a bit more slowly, singing in a lower key, but they’d be right there on stage and then POOF, they’d’ be gone.

Happened with Jeff Beck. And then there are acts that are sick but unless you’re inside the circle you don’t know, like Glenn Frey and Jimmy Buffett. The former died before his time, at age 67, which may seem old to many, but not to today’s baby boomers. Glenn was ripped-off. Then again, you can’t fight father time and you can’t fight your genes. Sure, bad behavior can shorten your life, you can become a member of the 27 Club, but oftentimes you’re just minding your own business and…that twinge, that symptom that you think will go away doesn’t and suddenly you find yourself on the wrong side of the line. Happened to Peter Frampton. Who gets kudos for going on record about it, because most men do not.

What exactly was Donald Trump rambling about at West Point yesterday? Now he’s got those on the left wondering about dementia. Can you really attribute it to the weave? Are we seeing the Donald decline in plain sight like we did Joe Biden, with all his supporters and inside acolytes denying what we see with our own eyes as if they’re sweepers on a curling sheet?

Then there are the six Democratic members of Congress who passed in the past year. Can happen to anyone, but odds are it will happen more to the aged. Seventy is not the new forty, fifty or even sixty. Your attitude can’t fight genetics. We have better health care, but everybody deteriorates over time. It’s a shock, assuming you’re tested. I had a clear carotid artery scan in the nineties, but not recently. And when I bring it up to most people, even those with heart attacks in their families, they almost all say they’ve never even had this test. They’d rather live in ignorance, believing they’re going to last forever, like Warren Zevon, who might have been saved if he’d gone to the doctor earlier, but he didn’t.

So we’ve been laughing for decades about the Stones. You’d better go see them now because it could be the last time. But they keep keepin’ on. We expected Keith to go first, but out of the blue Charlie died, the Big C got the drummer, and it could get you too.

But you don’t believe it. And you believe if you’ve got it you’re going to fight it, even though science says otherwise. Your mental attitude has nothing to do with your results/possible recovery. Not a thing. You go through the course of treatment and you see what happens. And the weird thing is the person on the precipice usually makes peace with their passing just before they go, even though those who remain cannot.

But life goes on. That’s the amazing thing. LBJ was sworn in on the plane back from the assassination of JFK. Nobody is indispensable, everybody is expendable, we circle the wagons, squeeze into your space and go on, not because we’re a*sholes, but because that’s the nature of being human, it’s in our DNA to survive.

As for Billy Joel… For a long time he was like Meat Loaf, an absolute icon on the east coast, but not so much on the west. They never played “Paradise by the Dashboard Light” on the radio in Los Angeles, never mind most not knowing who Phil Rizzuto was. But Marvin Lee Aday is gone now. Covid got him. He refused the vaccine. I bet he’d take it now if he had the chance.

But we all get to rule our lives the way we want to. And we think this is a privilege, freedom, but in truth many are slackers, they don’t have enough money or enough character to take care of themselves. To dot the i and cross the t, to go to the dentist and doctor on a regular basis. If you’re poor you live less long, those are statistics, but we live in a world where no one believes them anyway, everybody believes they’re going to live forever.

All of my friends do, everybody in their seventies. Whether retired or not. There’s endless roadway before the sun sets. Only there’s not. Whether it be by accident, like with Dave Shapiro, or bad luck, like with Michael Leon. But everybody convinces themselves their situation is different, that they’re immune.

And despite all this talk about the aged constantly discussing their health, generally speaking men do not. They don’t admit their failings. How are you doing? GREAT! But then you dig beneath the surface, peel back the layers. and if they’ve gone to the doctor you find out this is untrue, their body is deteriorating, it’s got flaws, but they don’t want to admit it.

First it was the acts that made it in the sixties. Now it’s those who peaked in the seventies, even eighties. They’re falling off the radar screen.

But what’s worse is most of them will never be remembered, most of them are unknown by the younger generations. Those records you bought, those shows you went to, they don’t know and they don’t care and if you’re judging them for it let me quiz you on your parents’ music, I doubt you’ll know much.

So Billy Joel… He’s been married and divorced more than once. He’s been ripped-off, losing almost all of his money. He had a bad motorcycle accident. But he’s always bounced back, always.

Billy finally broke in L.A. with “My Life” in 1978. And he was one of the few classic acts who got on MTV and stayed there, Billy was a staple.

But then he decided to record no new music.

But something funny happened along the way. With no hits, his rep got even better. He went on tour with Elton John, dueling pianos, implying that he was just as big as the English star, and then he wasn’t performing that much and then he started to do big shows, even stadiums, and playing Madison Square Garden every month and…

Those MSG shows were not rote. He switched up the numbers, he had guest stars, they were positively alive. Which is kind of strange for such a big stage, most people are afraid to do this, but Billy became comfortable in his own skin, and he became even more self-deprecating, people love it when you have a sense of humor about yourself. Furthermore, he still had his chops, go to the show and you’ll be amazed. But will you be able to go anymore?

It’s not exactly clear from the stories in the press. We learned that performing made his condition worse and now he’s going to physical therapy and I’ve got no idea how this plays out, but there’s a chance you’ll never be able to see Billy Joel on stage ever again. And if you haven’t and want to, you’ll feel ripped-off.

Yes, that joke about the Stones is now true. This truly could be the last time.

It’s astounding that these old dudes (and it’s almost all males) can still ply the boards. Mick Jagger is still dancing, yet he had heart surgery. But what else are they going to do, stay home? Then again, Mick Ralphs has been in a nursing home for the better part of a decade. His playing is still stellar on the recording of “All the Young Dudes,” but he can’t play it on stage anymore. And the man who wrote it, David Bowie, will have been gone for ten years in January.

It’s a wake-up call. Then again, I seem to be the only one who wants to be conscious when I’m dying. Everybody I know wants to die in their sleep. I don’t get that. You’re alive and kicking and then you don’t wake up, having no idea that it was your last day on earth? No, I want to see it coming.

But no one sees the end of the classic rock performers coming.

Oh, they talk about it, about how their business will be missed, but now there are younger acts that can sell out stadiums.

It’s all going down the drain. It’s the nature of life. You can get plastic surgery, go on a GLP-1 and look just marvelous, but that does not change your DNA and the attrition of age.

Everybody’s in denial. Joe Biden believed he could rule until he was 86. Now it looks like he probably won’t even live that long. And we were supposed to believe too. In this artifice.

No one lives forever. Everything falls away. Billy Joel is 76. Your mom might be in her nineties, as mine was before she passed, but my dad died at 70. Sure, there are spry septuagenarians out there, but a ton are dying too.

But no one wants to talk about this, everybody wants to put on a brave face. Like I said, everybody thinks they’re going to live forever, but this is not the case.

So, if you’re in your seventies, don’t keep pushing your desires into the future. If you want to see that act, go NOW, because you may never be able to again. As for spending your money, and hopefully you have some, financial advisors will tell you one of the biggest hurdles they must overcome is convincing their clients to spend their money. Sure, if you want to save it and give it to your progeny, fine, but if you’re denying yourself…

As for medical breakthroughs… Good luck now that Trump has excised employees and wants to hold back money for research at universities. You want to pay no additional taxes, but believe me, on your deathbed, you’ll wish there was a cure.

I hope there is for Billy Joel. The last time I saw him was at the Hollywood Bowl, and I couldn’t ask for anything more, he was as good as he could have possibly been.

And I play his “Songs in the Attic” LP on a regular basis, it’s emblazoned upon my brain.

But that might be the only place it lives in the future.

“I don’t need you to worry for me ’cause I’m all right”

But fifty years later we are worried. Billy is no longer spry and neither are we.

“I don’t care what you say anymore this is my life

Go ahead with your own life, leave me alone”

That’s one thing you realize as you get older, we’re all equal. And we all excel in certain areas. We may not be able to play and sing like Billy Joel, but we might be able to fix the toilet or the computer or do a whole host of other things. That was your life. And in most cases, other than your family and a few friends, you’re being left alone.

But it’s art that brings us together. And nothing so much as musicians. They sing their life, which we identify with. They make us feel connected, they give us a reason to live. They’re off on the horizon and we keep trying to get closer to them.

But ultimately it’s a mirage. They’re gone. You think you know them but you never really did. Can we really ever even know another person?

But there’s nothing worse than being alone.

All those acts from way back when, they were ubiquitous in a way today’s acts are not. EVERYBODY who was conscious in 1978 knows “My Life,” whether they liked it or not, you could not escape it.

Yes, some people hated Billy Joel, but all these years later…

The same people who hated the Carpenters now love them.

But they pushed Karen over the edge.

We all are just dust in the wind.

But that’s more than a song.

This leaving…I don’t know where to put  my emotions, which are palpable, if for no other reason than no one else admits to having them.

Maybe they do.

But maybe the only way we can connect is through the records.

Those classic rock tracks. They were more than songs, they were life itself.

But the candle does not burn forever, at some point it either burns down to nothing or gets snuffed out.

Hopefully yours won’t get snuffed out before your time.

But it could happen, never forget that.

P.S. If you type “my life lyrics” into Google (sans the quotation marks) you get J. Cole’s song from 2021, and if that doesn’t prove the point…

HAVE A PERSONALITY

Bland doesn’t work on TikTok, edge does. Doesn’t matter whether you’re likable or not, but whether you’re interesting.

DON’T BE WORRIED ABOUT WHAT OTHERS THINK

You connect most when you’re true to yourself. You’re selling yourself, you’re in the business of yourself. 

IGNORE NEGATIVE FEEDBACK

Haters come with the territory. If you post, people will hate on you. It’s hard to ignore the sh*t-talking, but if you can’t, TikTok is not for you. Too many people are afraid to play. This is less of an issue with younger generations. One must adjust to the modern paradigm, everybody has an opinion and everybody expresses it. Furthermore, people are angry that you’re posting and they are not (usually they’re afraid to), or they are posting and you have much more traction. Everybody can be picked on. The lowest form of criticism is looks-based. Don’t fall into this trap, it killed Karen Carpenter. You are who you are, own it.

ANONYMITY IS FOR PUSSIES

If you can’t own your name and identity, TikTok is not for you. You want traction, more fans, more views. And you want to be able to build on the traction you get. You don’t want to have to change your name/say who you really are down the line.

BE SEARCHABLE ELSEWHERE

If someone likes you, they want to know who you are. Make sure you have enough postings online so they can research you and feel like they know you.

POST REGULARLY

If you’re not willing to do it on a regular basis, don’t start. However, be wary of falling into the “influencer” trap. Those people always burn out, they work ’round the clock and ultimately have to stop for their mental health. If you’re out eating a burger thinking you’ve got to go home to post, you’re doing it wrong.

EVERYTHING YOU DO WON’T BE GREAT

That’s the internet paradigm, you do it until it catches on, people ignore the tripe. Don’t keep polishing one video, let it go and create another one. The best ones are when you capture lightning in a bottle, instantly…are inspired and lay it down without thinking about it. Sure, there is a business in expensive stunting…but that’s what OK Go is known for, not their music, and it costs Mr. Beast a ton of money and time. Think punk rock, not classic rock. Don’t be mad at yourself for doing something that’s not a ten. If you do enough, your average will improve and ultimately you’ll create a ten.

HONESTY IS THE BEST POLICY

Artifice went out with the old static Instagram. Polishing your physicality doesn’t resonate with most people, they want the real you. Makeup is not anathema, as long as the people watching know you aren’t wearing makeup.

DON’T BREAK DOWN AND COMPLAIN

Life is hard for all of us. Too many posters get down in the dumps when they realize social media doesn’t solve their problems and they break down in posts talking about their personal problems… There is a business in talking about depression. But unless you have a big loss, don’t go on about it.

HAVE A SHTICK

What are you famous for? Your mode of delivery? Your jokes? Is it the way you deliver your message or the message itself? Once again, personality is key, if your posts are based on your identity you can always pivot and go into new content areas.

LOOKS COUNT

Maybe this is unfortunate for those of us who are not blessed in this area, but let’s not deny reality. The beautiful have a leg up on social media. But viewing TikTok will prove to you that there are an unlimited number of beautiful people online, that’s not enough to sustain a career. Beauty will get you started, but it won’t keep people coming back. Three-dimensional works online, not two-dimensional.

HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR ABOUT YOURSELF

Don’t put yourself down to avoid feedback. But if you make a mistake, own it. Don’t go on about how stupid you are unless you truly screwed up. The smart people saying they’re stupid, the thin people saying they’re fat, they’re so caught up in the game that they can’t win. Start with truth. That’s what resonates.

GIVE VIEWERS A REASON TO COME BACK

Why do I want to see you again? You probably won’t know until you do it for a while. This is not about launching a business, this is about putting one foot in front of the other in a journey of self-discovery. You probably won’t find out what people react to until you do it for a while. But there must be something about you and your presentation that intrigues people.

PROFESSIONAL VS. AMATEUR

Anybody can play, but not anybody can win. Having said that, you can own a niche and be unknown to most people and still have quite a career. Decide if you want to make a living online or you’re just playing around. Because to succeed takes focus.

THIS IS THE GOAL

Don’t think of brand extensions, you are the act, find ways to capitalize on who you are and what you do, content as opposed to penumbra.

DON’T TRY TO GO VIRAL

Don’t second guess the audience, this has been proven to be unsuccessful over and over again. What people liked in the past does not mean they’ll like that in the future. The more you focus inward, the more success you’ll have outward.

EXPERTISE COUNTS

If your personality and delivery are not intriguing, it’s best to have expertise in an area. Could be anything, sometimes people watch just to learn, having no interest in pursuing the field.

DON’T TRY TO PLEASE EVERYBODY

This is a fool’s errand. You want a passionate response, not blah. You don’t want to be liked, you want to be loved. And not everybody can be loved by everybody, and you don’t have to be loved by everybody to be successful

VIEWS OR SELLS?

There is a business in being a classic influencer, gaining enough of an audience to sell products, but in doing so you lose all credibility, you’re just flavor of the moment. The low hanging fruit is attractive, but it’s a shortcut. You can talk about the products you love, but if you’re trying to sell something in the process, you’re an advertiser. Better to make the money so you can buy products as opposed to getting them for free.

COMMENTARY

Your insight must be just that, insightful, or this is a no-go. We don’t need another Trump lover or hater, but we do need educated people who can make sense of the landscape for others who don’t have enough time to research the issues or can’t see the forest for the trees. Emotion counts, but it’s better when it’s about your personal experience as opposed to the world at large unless you’re different from the average person, are a seer.

THIS IS YOUR BUSINESS

Don’t think about crossing over…to what? Successful TikTokkers get many more views than TV news and sitcoms and… Don’t try to plug your new media self into the old media game. It’s not about leveraging your fame to play in their world, you’re living in the new world, they’re living n the old, look forward, not back. If you can’t find a way to be successful online, evidencing your identity and shtick, then you don’t understand what is going on.

VIEWS ARE EVERYTHING

That’s your goal. Views pay. Literally, in dollars. Also, the more views you get the more your name has a chance to spread and that’s where opportunities lie.

SLOW AND STEADY WINS THE RACE

TikTok is overwhelmed with people who went viral once, and are desperately trying to replicate this success and never do.

DON’T ASK YOUR AUDIENCE FOR FAVORS

Don’t ask your audience to make you a success. To spread the word on you. Either you’re good enough that they want to spread the word or you’re not. People are sick of being dunned for free work. It gives off a bad vibe.

NOT TOO LONG

Yes. Don’t fall into the musician trap of filling the sixty plus minutes on a CD. Keep it short enough to be interesting.

NO MULTIPART STORIES

Cliffhangers are for network television. Online people want it all and they want it now, give it to them. And don’t take multiple clips to tell a story that can easily be told in one.

HIT THEM WITH THE HOOK

It’s incredibly easy to thumb past a video. You have to give people a reason to watch. Start with the headline, the nougat, and then digress if you have to. Start with the chorus, not the verse.

START

This is the number one rule of social media, unless you post you’re nowhere. Better to start and be bad than try to polish a video to begin.

Tune in Saturday May 24th to Faction Talk, channel 103, at 4 PM East, 1 PM West.

Phone #: 844-686-5863

If you miss the episode, you can hear it on demand on the SiriusXM app. Search: Lefsetz