Siggi’s Triple Cream

This stuff is like crack.

I was not enamored of the Siggi’s Skyr Felice purchased. It reminded me of the yogurt of the early sixties, when it was a health food, before all the added sugar and pasteurization, it was not exactly sweet and not exactly bitter but not exactly satisfying.

But the nutritionist said I could eat as much of Siggi’s 4% whole-milk yogurt as I wanted, as long as it was not the vanilla, which has agave, which is a no-no.

That’s right, too much of conventional wisdom is wrong. Quinoa has little protein, that food special on Netflix is inane, and there’s nothing wrong with fat, you need it, it makes your food taste good so you get satisfied sooner and don’t overeat. So when you see those people with their carb bars and zero fat yogurt laugh.

Now the 4% whole-milk yogurt tastes much better. But there’s not much of it, it comes in a flat container of 125 grams but it does have 12 grams of protein, and it was my morning yogurt of choice until…

Dedicated readers know that I’m addicted to Dannon Coffee Yogurt. That I’ve been known to go from store to store in search of it, like a junkie. I’ve spent days eating only it and trail mix, swirled together, that’s my idea of satisfaction, whip one up for my last meal. But that trail mix resulted in so many broken teeth I was about to become a partner with my dentist. So, I went cold turkey on the nuts, and then my nutritionist talked about the amount of sugar and…

I stopped.

Not that she made me. I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, she’s not a martinet, she believes I’m entitled to some pleasure, but I switched to Siggi’s 4%.

Then I started adding in some walnuts. I know, I know, I’ve backslid, but walnuts are soft and the whole thing reminds me of what once was and I’m hoping the longer I consume it and the more distance between me and Dannon and trail mix the more I’ll forget about my elixir of choice. But it’s just like heroin, you can be clean for years, but then one hit will put you over, I know from experience.

But last week Instacart made a mistake, and instead of the 4% Siggi’s they delivered…

THE TRIPLE CREAM!

I’m loath to tell you this, I don’t want there to be a run at the markets, but this stuff is so satisfying it will put a smile on your face and make you hoard, it’s that good.

They are tiny little containers. Only 114 grams. It’s like sitting down with caviar, only much cheaper and much sweeter.

Yes, it’s sweet.

But it’s not Chobani.

Greek yogurt, love it. And I’m one of those people who believe nothing can be too sweet. But come on Chobani, you’re just adding too much sugar, you’re leaving health behind, but Siggi’s Triple Cream…

So I open the fridge and see the Lilliputian cups and start to laugh, I ask Felice, WHAT IS THIS?

But it’s all we had and I ripped off the top and dug in my spoon and…as the lone review on Amazon says:

THIS IS THE BEST YOGURT IN THE ENTIRE WORLD!

Siggis Icelandic Style Strained Triple Cream Yogurt

Nothing this good can be good for you, so I asked the nutritionist.

She said the 4% had more protein and less fat, but I could eat two Triple Creams a day if I wanted.

And I do.

I was just at Gelson’s, trying to fill my pail enough to qualify for the coupon. What did I want?

And then I saw the dairy case and my heart started to pitter-patter, I was jonesing, did they have it…THEY DID!

And as soon as I got home I ripped off the top and dug in.

It’s just that damn good.

And good for you.

Well, compared to the usual sugar-laden crap.

Consider this a public service announcement.

You’ll thank me.

Click on “triple cream” on the right-hand side, under “skyr.” Or scroll down the page:

siggis

The Golden Globes

Whenever Hollywood gets together to pat itself on its back it fails to realize it’s lost touch with America.

That’s right, no one cares what an actor or actress has to say, they became unmoored from the public consciousness the day America got broadband, and could see their shenanigans on TMZ, ignorant hustlers inured to lifestyle, and you expect us to care?

Ironically, musicians have much more power. Or to quote the great Eddie Rosenblatt, movies when done right are larger than life, music when done right is life itself.

But the musicians have abdicated this power. Playing it safe, worried about their brand, being such outrageous outlaws that they take themselves out of contention for believability. You got shot, beat someone up and you expect us to respect you? No, you’re just a cartoon, entertainment before Adult Swim, we’re just watching the movie, we want to see how this all plays out.

You think there’s not a cost for making vapid high concept flicks?

Or awards season fodder that no one cares about?

That respect for Hollywood royalty is so deep in the past, the hangers-on and barely-breathing don’t realize it. If we want to respect someone, it will be a banker or a techie, at least they’ve got real money, at least they change the world. As for all of Hollywood going high tech, did you see that Jessica Alba’s Honest Company is tanking? That’s right, if your goal is to utilize your celebrity to extend your reach into businesses other than the one you are famous for, give up, that paradigm is so aughts. If you think you can compete with the Big Four you’re delusional. Then again, they do call Hollywood the Dream Factory.

Hell, if it wasn’t the dead of winter no one would be watching this show. People are home, in their cocoon, they’ll wrap themselves up and watch this meaningless dreck, an awards show even more fake than those perpetrated on us by Dick Clark. How many members are there of the Hollywood Foreign Press again? As for “Mrs. Maisel,” I watched it, and it’s one step above sitcom, and not a big one, great sets, great acting, bogus script. Remember when “Mozart In The Jungle” won? That’s the last time I heard anybody mention that show.

As for Queen Oprah…

SHE’S RETIRED! Today you have to be in the public eye 24/7, and she’s not, she’s old and over the hill, not because she’s a woman, but because time marches on and in Hollywood where you think you’re young forever the truth is you’re not, even if you’ve gotten plastic surgery.

So we’ve got to hear the left wing press and movers and shakers, the sycophants, say she should run for President. Give me a break, we already saw this movie, after Jesse Ventura, the public realizes its mistake and returns to professionals, at least smart people. I mean the hoi polloi can learn too. Do you really think we’re gonna elect Mark Cuban? Then again, he’s got more business experience.

And is the problem with sexual harassment limited to Hollywood? Who’s standing up for the common person, who’s digging down deep in the trenches for solutions? Chappelle says not to forget men, without them there’s no progress, Daphne Merkin talks about due process, but we’re giving all this ink to a bunch of primpers in black? Insane.

So a publicity release press, and that’s what they all are, even the NYT and WSJ, will fawn all over this irrelevant event as if it had meaning, impact, when the truth is it’s already been forgotten, in a world where you don’t even get a day in the news cycle.

Meanwhile, we get all this self-congratulatory pomp from Hollywood. The same enterprise that makes you subscribe to umpteen services to see what you want, overcharges for movie tickets and then bitches when we cut the cord and refuse to go to movies that get bad ratings on RottenTomatoes. Come on, this is a cabal that’s driving straight towards a cliff and doesn’t even realize it, other than Rupert Murdoch, who sold Twenty First Century to Disney, realizing the worm has turned and it’s only going to get worse. Then again, Disney has the faltering ESPN and thinks its brand name can compete with Netflix. How do you like that Motorola phone? Your Nokia? Buy anything made by Sony recently?

If you’re a fashionista, by all means watch this bore and be satisfied.

If you’re a fan of comedy, know that Seth Meyers has a miniscule audience and gets no respect from anybody under 30, but you can’t say anything negative about a Lorne Michaels protege.

But if you’re taking the temperature of America, not only did you have no need to watch this show, you don’t have to read the press, check out the winners, nothing, it’s irrelevant in life today, where you’re the star and you’re worried about your own influence and relationships and you can’t take your eyes off of D.C. Hell, if Hollywood is so powerful how come Trump won? When other than Chachi, no celebrity would show up for him? Seems he had his finger on the pulse much more than the entertainment industrial complex, which refuses to believe it built him and loves the ratings that come with covering him.

Talk about taking no responsibility.

Do you think Logan Paul’s fans care you castigated him for his video in the suicide forest? Hell, he was wrong, but he didn’t even need to apologize, his fans had no problem with it.

And C. Delores Tucker and her ilk got Warner to blow out Interscope which promptly became the biggest label in the business and now hip-hop dominates and did you even get that reference, do you even know who that is?

Maybe if Jimmy Iovine foisted the Globes on all of our iPhones like he did U2, maybe then there would be an effect, but it would be OUTRAGE!

The truth is you can turn off the TV, you don’t have to follow the news, but the people who print every day, who are part of the complex, just don’t get it that the game has changed.

Celebrity has been devalued. Managing your impact is now completely different.

And just because you tell us something, that does not make it so.

So Oprah can go to sleep basking in all the accolades.

Meanwhile, where’s my good-paying job? If I blow the whistle on my boss I’ll get fired. How am I gonna pay for health care?

Who cares about me?

Certainly not the people on TV.

Daphne Merkin – “Publicly, We Say #MeToo. Privately We Have Misgivings”

“No Longer A Unicorn, Jessica Alba’s Honest Co. Struggles to Grow”

Marry Me

Marry Me – Spotify

Thomas Rhett – Marry Me – YouTube

The one who got away.

The Brothers Osborne were WAILING! Their new track “Shoot Me Straight” was playing atop Spotify’s Hot Country playlist and I was wondering why all the rockers lamenting the death of their format were not listening to this. Sure, the band was not breaking new ground, but this was a natural extension of what once was in the classic era more than all that derivative hogwash on the Active Rock format, the Brothers Osborne could single-handedly bring back the art of the guitar.

Maybe.

Did you read that article about the guy eaten by an alligator recommended by David Brooks? You absolutely should, because it illustrates how the other half lives. You think everybody’s just like you, trying to get ahead, taking enrichment courses, to get into a good college, or bitching that the system is screwing them, but there’s a plethora of people who barely make it out of high school, if they do at all, and go into jobs of manual labor and live to drink and are not complaining but have contempt for you, and that’s what’s wrong with the country right there, a misunderstanding of how everybody lives their life. And, unfortunately, the media usually misses all this. Just like it missed hip-hop, and now says that hip-hop rules.

It does.

Because it embraced the internet.

Thomas Rhett’s “Marry Me” is slowly climbing up the Mediabase chart, even though it was a hit on the day it was released, which is why it’s number two on the Spotify Hot Country playlist.

She wants to get married, she wants it perfect
She wants her granddaddy preaching the service
Yeah, she wants magnolias out in the country
Not too many people, save her daddy some money

Another sappy country song about love, I’ve got it, even though the melody is enticing.

That’s what’s wrong with too much country music, it plays it safe, speaks to a market, does its best to be inoffensive, but that’s business, not art, art is truth, it comes from the inside.

Ooh, she got it all planned out
Yeah, I can see it all right now

Seemingly every girl has this fantasy, despite their demeanor.

I’ll wear my black suit, black tie, hide out in the back
I’ll do a strong shot of whiskey straight out the flask
I’ll try to make it through without crying so nobody sees
Yeah, she wanna get married
But she don’t wanna marry me

HUH???????

Wait a second, this is just a typical small town lower middle class southern story and then…

Suddenly it’s EVERYBODY’S STORY!

No one compromises in hip-hop, no one saves anybody any money. No one wants to do it small, but everybody gets their heart broken.

Maybe it’s your first love. Maybe it’s the first person you had sex with. Forty years later I’ve got a friend who laments the one he lost his virginity to, he stalks her online, sees her new life, wants to contact her, but is afraid of her husband and two kids.

As he should be.

He’s convinced if he was with her he’d be happy.

We’re all looking for happiness.

What would it have been like?

Sometimes you had a relationship, sometimes a connection, sometimes just a crush. You played it out in your brain, what it would be like with them. And usually you get old enough and you realize this is not the way it works, that they really didn’t slip away, they just took a different path, and you’ll find your person, you just have to keep searching.

I remember the night when I almost kissed her
Yeah, kinda freaked me out, we’d been friends for forever
And I always wondered if she felt the same way
When I got the invite, I knew it was too late

Those moments of intimacy. Are they sexual or just friendship? If only you could stop the movie and speak the truth, but you can’t do this. You go by feel, you’ve got to step up to the plate, but you’re afraid if she doesn’t feel the same way it’s gonna ruin it. Forever.

And I know her daddy’s been dreading this day
Oh, but he don’t know he ain’t the only one giving her away

What a great couplet! Where does this daddy stuff come from? So insightful. He’s her little girl, he’s got to let go.

But so does he.

But what seals the deal is the chorus.

He’s in his black suit, out in the back, drinking straight from the flask, you can picture it.

But you can also sing it.

In a whisper as you’re navigating traffic.

In the bar with your friends as it comes over the jukebox.

With your honey lying on the couch.

That’s music. The kind that used to dominate. Universal messages conveyed in not only a way we can all relate, but that we can all sing along with.

Thomas Rhett is burning up the chart, he’s got a string of hits. But he’s not changing what he does for dominance, not modifying what he does to be pop, because that’s death, there’s a dearth of pop his on the radio these days, but these country songs are getting bigger and bigger, they’re the ones that are making inroads on streaming, every cut on Thomas Rhett’s 2017 album “Life Changes” has more than a million streams on Spotify, many double-digit millions, “Craving You” 73+ million and “Marry Me” already almost 18 million. This music is resonating, but in a backwater without attention.

But that’s gonna change.

Brothers Osborne “Shoot Me Straight” – Spotify

Brothers Osborne “Shoot Me Straight” – YouTube

Gator story

The Michael Wolff Book

I bought it.

This was the breakthrough Kindle moment, not that you’ve seen any press about it. I doubt there’s enough physical inventory in stores. They’re gonna run out…if they’re not reprinting right now. This is the world we used to live in in music. All that money wasted on printing and supply chain, shipping, returns, it’s gone with digital. Along with gatefold covers and credits, but you lose something in every revolution, the march forward is always imperfect.

And no one talks about record stores anymore. For so long every magazine had an owner lamenting the passing of his dream. I remember a story in “Newsweek,” where the owner said selling records was the only thing he was good at. Better prepare for the future, because it involves change. And if you don’t adjust, you’re gonna be left behind. The truth is they’re making new people every day, and those people need jobs, and they’ve got fewer encumbrances and newer knowledge and the fact that you’ve got experience…doesn’t always trump them.

So I didn’t have to go to the store to buy “Fire and Fury.” Thank god. Do I really want to get in my car, fight the traffic, park, and then hopefully find the book in stock when I can just click to download it?

This is like when a musician dies. Most famously Elvis. He was on the back nine, no one was paying attention, he passes and there’s no inventory. Now when someone dies their tracks zoom up the Spotify chart. And I’d be stunned if this isn’t one of the best selling Kindle titles ever. Not that we can get that info. Funny how the music business is moving towards transparency, you can see the exact number of plays on Spotify, but the number of books sold?

Good luck.

But it’s much lower than you think. And the publishers don’t want this info out there. But obfuscation always hurts your business. Which is why transparent Silicon Valley gets all the money.

So, no one proofread “Fire and Fury.” You start hitting misspellings and missing words almost from the get-go. And the truth is you find these mistakes in most new books, which speaks to the fact that no one reads them before publication. Send one to me, I could mark it up easily. Not that I’m the only one. The author is mesmerized, in the zone, he misses the mistakes, but couldn’t anybody at Henry Holt give it a read?

Of course they did, they decided to publish it. A lawyer(s) was worried about lawsuits.

But first and foremost a book is to read. And forgetting about the mistakes above, “Fire and Fury” is absolutely riveting. You cannot put it down. Because Michael Wolff can write.

I liked the old Michael Wolff better. Before the suits, before the divorce, when he didn’t take himself so seriously. I loved “Burn Rate.” But now he wants to be just like those he chronicles and it doesn’t wear well on him. He’s a scrapper. And everybody hates him for it. But he’s doing God’s work here.

Because the written word rules.

Yes, he who writes down history owns it.

The world runs on gossip, but the final version is printed, and Wolff is the ultimate arbiter.

This is not about left and right, this is not about working the refs. This is insight into what truly happened, and whether it’s true or false, it’s the best account we’ve got. Janice Min testified that she was at that dinner with Ailes and Bannon, she says every quote is true, are we really gonna undercut and denigrate a woman in this instance, one who started off in gossip and then became a publishing majordomo? You can come from nowhere and make it in America, and if you don’t wish you were in that room where it happened, you’re lying.

But the reason the book works is because of ego.

People can’t help but talk.

Which is why David Geffen‘s image was tarnished forever, by agreeing to a biography by Tom King.

Same deal with Jann Wenner. He just couldn’t handle it that he’d fade away, he needed someone to write his history, and then Joe Hagan did and he didn’t like it.

At least Steve Jobs died. Otherwise he’d be bitching about Walter Isaacson’s account of his life.

The big winners can’t help themselves. They’re incomplete, they need the accolades. Admire those who hold back, who never do press. Like Jerry Perenchio, who you still don’t know, who recently died. If you worked for him and spoke to the press you were fired. Because the talent was the driver and the press was not on your side.

Who agreed to let Wolff into the White House?

It appears nobody.

Proving once again that despite all the security, if you just show up, you can go so far. Kinda like the people bitching their photos were stolen from Apple’s servers. No, there was no “hacking,” the perpetrator just guessed your weak passwords. It’s somebody else’s fault, never your own.

So Trump is a bozo. This book is definitive. Argue all you want, but we’re no longer listening.

Although he still is President. But for how long?

That’s the story here. Trump is gonna go or be neutered, it can’t go on like this.

Just like Bannon had to talk, the attrition will get to Trump. Everybody expects things to happen overnight. But that rarely occurs. The weight just keeps being lifted onto the camel’s back until it collapses. That’s a big lesson here. Be patient, play for the long term, it’s coming.

Also, it’s astounding how the press has reacted to Wolff’s book. Very few people read it, they reported on the penumbra. And soon they’ll be on to something else. They’re all about eyeballs, not about substance. But substance always rules in the end. He or she who puts in the time succeeds. And what you find out is Trump never put in the time, never.

But he won.

Why did he win?

It’s the power of television, the power of celebrity, the juice of America.

But also, despite being the consummate insider, he takes the position of an outsider, and in a world where everybody feels screwed over a great percentage of the public wanted to turn over the table, try anything new, they were sick of business as usual. Yup, you get that in “Fire and Fury,” Trump is nobody’s man, and this maverick spirit can be found appealing.

Furthermore, reading “Fire and Fury” it’s reinforced how we live in a two-tiered society, one of insiders and outsiders. Never have we known more about the insiders’ lifestyles, but really we know nothing.

We read about private jets, island vacations, but we’re not privy to the conversations, where the overlords cut up the country and share the spoils. Ailes and Murdoch think they run this world.

As for Bannon, he’s the interloper with a brain who thinks he can succeed.

But he’s propped up by the Mercers’ money. Who’ve seemingly abandoned him now. But it’s too late, because money pales beside power. Sometimes they’re one and the same, frequently they are not. Bannon is a household name these days. He can reach his constituency via the internet, assuming he’s not forced into the slow lane by the FCC.

Don’t look at this as a snapshot, but a movie. We’re past the halfway mark. The spikes and lulls should not be overinterpreted, stop listening to the bloviating nitwits on cable news.

And you can stop listening to those with an agenda.

You’ve just go to read this book and know…

We’ve hit a turning point.

P.S. I just checked on Amazon, the hardcover is sold out, they’re saying new orders will be shipped in 2 to 4 weeks, but you can have the Kindle edition…RIGHT NOW!

Fire and Fury: Inside the Trump White House