You don’t want to be everywhere.

Jam your product down people’s throats and a few looky-loos might become aware of it, but in truth you’re pissing off great swaths of the public, to your detriment. Today it’s all about credibility and longevity, despite the major labels focusing on cartoons like it’s still the heyday of MTV.

The truth is no one has universal market share today, and to try to force it is a fool’s errand. The issue isn’t so much that people don’t know, but that people don’t CARE! With so many opportunities that appeal to them more, they laugh and deride your endless promotion of stuff about which they care not a whit.

It’s the late sixties all over again. There’s a divide, just like there was with AM and FM. The Spotify Top 50 is AM, trying to appeal to the most people. But all the action is on FM, in the niches. We see demonstration of this at live shows. Guitars are dead on the Spotify Top 50, but when you go to the live show they’re everywhere! People want music that speaks to them, not only generic blather with a beat that is good to dance to. Stop going for the top, because there is none and your effort to get there, the push, the hype, will work against you as opposed to for you.

You want to last.

This is a completely different paradigm from becoming a business. Selling perfume and whisky and tchotchkes, bleeding your fans dry. This is the era when music shines. The more you go inside, the bigger you’ll become outside. If you’re busy telling everybody how great you are all over mainstream media, if I can’t click online without seeing an ad for your product, you’re doing it wrong.

It’s no longer the eighties. Which were a shock to those who’d lived through what had come before. Suddenly, there were no longer two scenes, maybe even three if you include late seventies disco, BUT ONE! That’s right, either you were on MTV or you were marginal. We had a monoculture. But the monoculture was blown apart in the twenty first century, it’s now all about the niches, to sign and promote, to want to be an act that appeals to everybody demonstrates that you either don’t care about the music or you’re compromised. If we hear about your lifestyle, where you were, what you did, you’re doing it wrong. Then you’re like a twentieth century movie star, playing a role, feeding the gossip rags.

And the truth is most people today have no idea who those faces in the gossip pages are. No way. And they don’t care!

Think about that, people DON’T CARE!

Every lauded production that is a must-see is not. Today’s public can miss anything. If it’s any good, they’ll catch up on it on demand online thereafter, but chances are if they weren’t interested the first time around they’re not going to bother, because they’d rather spend their time going deeper into their own interests.

If they hear it from you, you’re doing it wrong. They must hear it from your fans! It must be organic. It’s inherently slow. Don’t be impatient, you’re building a career, you’re going on an adventure, you’re not building a springboard to monetize elsewhere, you’re a musician, exploring your art.

And a musician can be very powerful, as long as they don’t abdicate their power to the machine.

Music, when done right, is truth. That’s your goal. Forget the flash, forget the hype, you’ve got to be authentic. That’s what the younger generations want most. Sure, they consume mindless crap, but some still listened to AM radio in the late sixties. Then again, many didn’t have access to FM, certainly not in the car. Today everybody has access to EVERYTHING! Don’t bitch about payments, just try to encourage repeats. That’s where the money is, with stuff that sticks. Which now more than ever is deep, not a novelty, something that comes from the heart, a statement, not something evanescent. If you’re tying in with Amazon and UPS, if your face is everywhere, the joke is on you, people are laughing behind your back.

We’re proud that we’re no longer a number. Today everybody is an individual and they’re predisposed to not want to be a member of the horde. You try to corral them at your peril. People have to come to you.

But you must be really damn good.

Sure, once you’ve got traction you can focus on social media, but before that, focus on the music! Look at Facebook. Misinformation spreads virally and as many people see it, most people never ever experience it. We’re not all in one big happy kumbaya tent in politics and we’re not in music. As a matter of fact, you can ignore the “Billboard” charts completely. The best metric is live, tickets and grosses. But not all shows charge the same price meaning… You’re on your own, buddy. It’s just you. And the truth is there’s a network of people hunting 24/7 for great new stuff. Believe me they’ll find it if you make it. Spamming them doesn’t work. Pros have their ear to the ground, they want to know what is happening. As for the industry rags, sold out to the labels, and the mainstream media, doing puff promotional pieces, ignore them completely, they’re on the downward swing. Really.

It happens gradually. And then you realize how big it is.

Then again, nobody today can wait. But the truth is it takes time to develop. And talk with the icons, they always say their initial songs sucked. You’ve got to jump through the hoops, there are no short cuts if you want to be an artist.

But if you want to be a star… There’s an entire apparatus that needs you to feed it. But they don’t need you, they just need somebody, and when you stop delivering hits you’re out of the news and nobody believes in you, nobody is bonded to you, you were high up the peak, now you’re not even in sight of the mountain.

We’re in the middle of the transition. The machine is too busy doing it the old way to recognize change. If your name is everywhere you’re nowhere, remember that.

Sparks are one of my favorite bands and I was so excited for this movie – saw it in the theater right when it was released. The problem was that it was just plain B-O-R-I-N-G! That was quite a feat considering how interesting of a band they are. What was the point of this project? They surely won’t pick up any new fans with this; none will even make it through! And for big fans like me – we already know the albums. Going through them (all 25) one by one was torture. I wanted to know more about Russ and Ron, and had the same unanswered questions that you did. 

Huge missed opportunity in my opinion. 

Rich Madow

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Really great points; even as a Sparks fan, I agree with all of them. I was disappointed with the Velvets doc for different reasons, though both had a similar “designer chips bag” quality. 

Probably dating myself here, but the last two truly great rock docs I recall seeing are New York Doll and Mayor of Sunset Strip. The latter plays (more?) creepily in the wake of the Fowley business, but it’s still quality film nonetheless. As is Doll, which has all the bathos and will to triumph that great artist stories are built on, plus Mormons!

It’s not a rock documentary, but to me, Zwigoff’s Crumb is the gold standard for capturing warts-and-all creative genius. 

Good stuff,
Casey Rae

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I gotta think the $ in the off US years was Europe & Japan. I thought it was better than the VU doc (too art monster) but the last 45 min dragged heavily. 

Steve Tipp

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now do “Annette” 🙂

Marius de vries

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I’ve been a Sparks fan for eons… While in college I took a class in French literature…(no I’m not that smart) and required reading was the French comedy writer of the 1600’s… Moliere… I connected the dots and realized that Sparks were rock and roll’s answer to a French comedy.. Moliere!!!  I loved the movie.. and yes it was a bit laborious at the end.. going over every album in chronological order coincides with their oddness. I thought the movie showed a great relationship of family… and that after 50 years brothers can still get along and love life.. 

Jeff Laufer

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I’m a fan of Sparks so I loved it besides the director Wright being brilliant telling their story in a unique exciting way for the youth of today.  At the theatre there were more kids working behind the counter asking my friends and I about the band than in the seats.  Cult band that even I admit am not crazy about half the records they made.  Similar to the Zappa documentary I really dug the early period.  Everyone should cut it off earlier like the Zeppelin one coming out.  I know there is an agenda with the Sparks legacy living on but at this point is it still really to an average movie goer or 70’s/80’s fan of the band ?  That is the 10,000 dollar question.  I think we already know the answer.

Peter Gianakopoulos
The Old School Records

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The Sparks Brothers Movie is just way too long.   With a 90 minute film you’d have got a taster and wondered how Sparks passed you by.  At 140 minutes you’ve heard it all and are not surprised they never made it big.  Edgar Wright is still a genius though.  Last Night in Soho is a belter. 

Andrew Harting

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I just watched the trailer. Are you sure it’s not a joke? With all those people pretending they were a big deal? (It certainly sounds like it’s a joke.)  I’ll have to watch!

Jeffrey Ainis

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Tell me this Bob – why should everyone else be denied the chance to see a movie on a huge theater screen, just because YOU don’t want to?  Millions of people still like to go to the movies.  The fact you’re not one of them is probably the fault of the substandard theaters in your area (and Covid), not the movie theatre industry as a whole.

A film gets a buzz out of a theatrical release that it will never get from a straight to video release.

Mike Blakesley
(A theater owner)

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We did a sneak peek screening last June, where Chad Smith and GE Smith introduced the film. This was when nobody was going to theaters, but they came out for this. 

It’s a one-of-a-kind film. Especially if you fancied yourself a stay at home music historian. 

D

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I liked it but WAAAAAY too long. 

Karen Bliss

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Sparks are the future of rock. A niche act with a small but totally loyal fanbase.  No piles of gold, just being able to have a modest but very lovely life playing music for decades.  What more can you ask for?

Sara Joseph

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Love your review. I actually enjoyed the movie and agree with one interviewee’s view of their ability to age elegantly in the pop music business. Still, I had some carps of my own. 

Though he owns up to the silliness of his literal visual, making them meta doesn’t make them any less silly. 

The film does address the money issue by saying that when they were flush they saved their money rather than putting it up their nose or buying flashy cars and big houses, but I too would have liked more personal background.

While I was left with admiration for their ambition, independence, and stick to it attitude, I don’t find their music any more interesting than I did at the time. 

Be well

Michael Ross

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……I loved every minute of it!

Tommy Allen

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Boy do I think you have this wrong. At first I thought this another attempt at another Spinal Tapesque movie. 

But I was an avid listener at the time and I had never heard of them. The documentary was about fascinating quirkiness. It doesn’t really answer any questions maybe because the point is to leave you wondering about everything. 

Now that I have seen the documentary would I’d be interested if they were on your podcast? Oh yeah, they left you with hours of questions. 

Marc Menchel

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The Sparks Brother movie is the prequel to Annette by Leos Carax. When watched one after the other it makes both movies better.

Mathieu-Gilles-Lanciault

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You ask the same questions I do. How do they exist when they don’t have jobs? And nothing about their personal lives. I watched out of curiosity because I first became aware of them via the Rollercoaster film. And Paul McCartney imitation of Ron in the Coming Up video. 

They’re a total cult band.

Peace

Tim Clary

P.S. And you’re right about it being on Netflix. I had no idea either.

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Loathe them more than Helen Reddy …. stay bright, Andrew Loog Oldham

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You have asked the ultimate question, everyone wonders. “How do/did you survive”? That would be a documentary.  Bands/artists work hard to have that moment, that success continuing success (Cash Flow) for most it never happens. It’s the elephant room. It goes against the rock star image the fans want. A day job is too normal not cool.  Fans don’t want to see “Rock Stars current or past” bagging Groceries or selling you life insurance.  Better staring in a documentary. 

You never said the run time of the film. By your review, it sounds like Gone with The Wind/ Another Peter Jackson Trilogy or at feels like it. I will go see it and drink coffee before I attend just in case. 

Dave May

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Hey Bob – I really enjoyed the Sparks movie! Yeah, it’s a bit completist and longer than it needs to be, but I had never really got Sparks’ music, and after seeing this, I picked up a couple of their albums, including a triple vinyl best of, that really covers all the bases.  I thought the fact that it covered every album was part of the neurotically humorous charm – I mean, The Bee Gees doc skipped their Sgt. Pepper disaster, instead blaming racism against disco for their career receding in the ‘80s, when I would argue overexposure combined with a couple questionable career decisions were to blame.

Jim McGuinn

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thanks for the review but i respectfully disagree, in a big way.  

in spite of being a former professional musician (who quit due to financial non success), a big music fan and having worked for a BMG affiliate early in my career, I had never heard of Sparks. 

i watched at the recomendation of a data scientist music loving colleague. 

This is the best music doc i have ever seen. i was absolutely riveted for the entire movie. 

I too wondered how the band survived financially, but honestly it’s non of my business- the fact
is they somehow afforded to make such amazing art for 20+ albums, and the art is what i wanted to learn about. not if a rich uncle left them money to live or if they invested in apple and that funded their band. 

i don’t actually like a lot of their songs, but i respect the hell out of their ability to never stop making music that they wanted to make. ANd, the movie shows they beautifully. 

thank you for reading. 

Peter Oriol

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I never heard of them.

Mike Donahue

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Gary Stewart was my first boss when I got out of college. I worked at Rhino from 1982-1984. Gary did try to recruit me into the Sparks fandom, but it was not my thing. I watched this documentary and had a flood of emotions watching my earliest mentor wax poetic on a band I never really understood. I went to nearly every “Losers Christmas Party” Gary threw. The last one I clearly remember the Mael brothers standing 3 feet away from me talking to mutual friends. I have never been a fan of the band, but any friends of Gary’s…

Marc Platt
Radio Candy
Los Angeles, California

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 One glaring question remains unanswered by this film……
   Why do people keep giving these guys RECORD DEALS!?
    Their early work, as technically proficient as it is, is  just too campy..It’s like they heard “Sweet Transvestite”, and said, ” Yeah! Let’s base a career around THAT!”..
    The guy is singing out of his range, and it sounds strained and unpleasant..The piano playing is fluent, but unfocused..
    Their 80s records are not bad..The synth work is tasteful, and the vocals are palatable..They should’ve cracked the code and been MTV stars..The hooks just weren’t there..
    But their biggest claim to fame was always, and always WILL be the keyboard player’s onstage schtick..
   I was kinda’ hoping to discover some cool older tunes to dive into..NOT!

James Spencer

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Despite being big in Britain I’d never taken any notice of them Bob – I viewed This Town Ain’t Big Enough… as a gimmick single, but after reading your review I decided to spin
a few later live vids on youtube and was pleasantly surprised – this performance with the excellent Catherine Ringer is great, but others without her are too +  the audiences 
are really pumped.

Singing in the Shower
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sqhEvPGdv4Q.

regards 

Linden Coll

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Great review, spot on.  You put into words what I could not.
A podcast episode would be phenomenal.  Please do find out how they paid/pay the bills!  And are they married?  Do they have kids?  Where do they live?  Do they own or rent?  
The doc was made by self-described ‘fanboy’ Edgar Wright and lacked anything critical.  Even when talking about booting out band members they then cut to the members themselves who talked about how it’s just fine and made sense and how they have no resentment?!?  That is not what we want and c’mon!   

Thanks

Josh Feingold

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i was a fan since hearing ‘Big Boy’ in ‘Rollercoaster’.  this ‘docu’ comes out and they tour.  tix here in dc are $100.  pass.

Gary W. Mendel

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When I was in High School, or maybe College, The only thing I knew about Sparks was seeing the adds for  
Propaganda on our local tv channels.  I thought it was odd since these were adds on our local stations and not on the networks.

A Friend of mine is a Sparks fan and asked me to go and see the documentary with him.
I did think it was a bit odd that there wasn’t much personal info about their lives. I also thought the movie could have been at least 45 Minutes shorter, or they could have given us mor info about their lives etc.
I did find some of their music to be interesting and certainly well done.

Bill from MN.

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And the moral of this story is..  we older gentlemen have no business watching the 150 minute Sparks doc on a lovely fall afternoon. Life is now officially too short. Pretty sure you wouldn’t have overlayed your career in music onto your review if, perhaps, you settled into your sofa late in the evening, with this doc being the cherry on top of a satisfying day. Angles, perspective, mindset. As every storyteller has muttered, ‘…you shoulda been there…’ 

Nick Brokenshire

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After twenty -five albums that were released during my most inquisitive period, I can’t name ONE tune of theirs off the top of my head. They did help rehabilitate the Hitler look. They had a gimmick that didn’t sustain as far as I’m concerned

Ralph Spillenger

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While I knew the name, I couldn’t remember any of the music but I enjoyed the Sparks doc…but I love all music docs for the most part. I couldn’t however get through the one on The Bee Gees  

Kenneth Williams

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Agree with you about the movie Bob. And I hope you do get them for a Podcast: that would be fun and we might get a few of these interesting questions answered. (I know you’ll get them asked.)

But I wanted to make a couple observations:

What’s hard to communicate — even in a hagiography as thorough and committed as The Spark Brothers — is just how great their best stuff is. 

From many years of reading your letter, I think I’ve twigged your preference for honesty in songwriting, and for plain-spoken poetry about the struggle of living, loving, and loss.

I think Sparks come from a different place altogether — essentially, the opposite end of the spectrum. They’re never about a one to one connection to the listener. For Ron (I think), that’s too much. 

Instead, Sparks are about the group.  Songs as secret messages sent out to those who will get them — and, as they have developed their art — do the work to get them. Yes, you’re absolutely right the movie is a fans-only vehicle. But in that regard it is fully in step with everything they’ve ever done. I think the biggest problem with it is the way it exposed how desperately they (or the director, at least) want(s) them to be loved. 

That’s a card they’ve never shown before. And I find myself wishing they hadn’t.

But no movie or overly-fond review can ever reduce their peak achievements. Kimono My House, for my tribe anyway, was a portal to a completely different world, one where we absolutely belonged. 

Like Bowie’s best stuff, it provided a kind of beacon.  Always will, I imagine. Netflix clunker or no….

Steven Lindstrom

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It’s Amazing how two people can watch the exact same film 
and have a COMPLETELY different experience
I’m Not an Uber Fan 
But I would say the Sparks brothers are not a band 
The Sparks brothers are not even a duo 
They are an Melodically Infused enigma 
That is a wonderful representation  
and extension of the eclectic artistic nature 
that expresses its self regardless of that Super Stardom’s Missing ingredient 
and that’s what this movie celebrates
Not pop hits 
not a competition 
to try to be the most successful act of all time 
They were/are focused on creating their melodic flamboyancies 

How refreshing to watch a doc 
not dripping in gooey gossip 
which I know  
The Alanis Morissette doc will certainly take care of ALL of that!

How refreshing to see two brothers 
that don’t spend their time fighting and breaking up.
One of the more bonded creative brother connections in music history 
the end

But I digress 
The movie actually does answer the questions you’re asking 
how did they live?
how did they survive ?
they continued to create regardless if they had distribution 
The continuous exploration of artistic expression that has thrilled hundreds of thousands of people around the world 🗺!
May there be more Sparks Brothers

Morley Bartnoff

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I don’t know if I’m moved to watch the doc now, or to completely shelve it. I’m leaning towards intrigue. I’ll be revealing here, when I saw the promos and music friends post about Sparks, I was like, “Who?”. Not familiar at all. The slick produced promos made me question myself, ‘how could you miss this music phenomenon?’. After reading your review, I don’t feel so bad. Not to take away from Sparks notoriety and success, I just felt I missed something in my music timeline. Especially with all these ones in the music industry that I’m fully aware of singing Sparks praise of influence. I guess I’ll watch it. 

Alex Hart

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I think Sparks are an extremely rare example of Musician’s who didn’t get caught up in excesses. Which in someways makes them all the more eccentric. And when they had an influx of cash (cuz they have had some hits in different spots of the globe) made a few small, wise real estate investments,.. most likely in the 1970’s/80’s.   They’ve worked with a very small team of people at least since I’ve known them starting around ‘03 and they’re not afraid to do much of the heavy lifting themselves, having self recorded most of their records in the past 20 years.  

They have stayed married to their craft. They are consistent and persistent.  Hard to fathom in the world of impatient dreamers we inhabit. 

They’ve done it this way and have continued to make it work. In fact their most recent record went top 5 (I believe?) in the UK.  And right now are perhaps enjoying their greatest period public acceptance, in the US.  Their 2 shows at the prestigious Disney theatre in Los Angeles this coming February have been sold out for months. 

From what I’ve read of your letter, you mostly write about big mainstream players.  You talk about artist’s cultural relevance and industry matters like how Taylor Swift’s business decisions might set trends moving forward, and what have you. Making predictions for us folks trying to squeeze a living out of this here racket. A super valid role to play in this crazy speculative thing we’re all in on. 

And their story doesn’t exist completely outside of that stuff,… but in many ways it is independent of it.  I get the sense though all you really want to know is “who’s really paying for this?” Like they secretly have the same sugar daddy that pays for Angeline’s billboards.  

I think they’ve done it their own way, and they deserve praise for it. Maybe they haven’t made a whole bunch of industry types rich,.. but they probably have made a smart publisher a few bones, as they’ve slowly amassed an impressive catalog of GREAT SONGS that make thousands around the globe really happy. I’m proud to say I got to witness this close up playing bass for them for 5 years from 2004-2009. 

So yeah I’m biased, you can discount what I have to say. But I think you should reconsider why their story is unique, important and yes even for those who mostly pedal in mainstream players, RELEVANT. 

Much love to ya Bob, 
Steven McDonald 

Trailer: https://bit.ly/3kzLoYt

It’s now on Netflix. And it starts out so good, but then…

If you read the reviews when it was released in theatres back in June, if you were privy to the insider buzz, you’d think “The Sparks Brothers” is the “Citizen Kane” of rock documentaries, that the band finally gets its due. And I felt this was the case at the beginning, and then…

This is not a slapdash documentary. This is an art film, with the interviews in black and white, it looks fantastic, but…

So we start out in Southern California. Illustrating the Mael brothers’ roots. And this is incredibly well done. Just when I was wondering if the boys played sports, you see Russell as a quarterback. And then they both attend UCLA and talk about movies, being influenced by the art films, the foreign films of the era, and you start to kvell, it’s a renaissance of what once was, a retelling, when there were no popcorn/tentpole/blockbuster movies, when no one but insiders knew the gross, when it was about testing limits.

And then there’s the start of the band and the link between them and Todd Rundgren via Miss Christine. It’s history come alive! But then…

I mean the movie starts out as hagiography, talking heads that would make you believe Sparks was as big and influential and noteworthy as well…the Talking Heads! There’s no context, this is a tribute movie. Like that BeeGees doc that played on HBO. No, the BeeGees were not as big as the Beatles in the sixties, they were not revered, they were second-tier singles makers, sorry to burst your bubble. And Sparks, then named Halfnelson, come out of the Beatle boom, when everybody was forming a band, but by time they get their record deal times were different. Truth is the touchy-feely mind trip records came out in the late sixties, by time the seventies hit the focus was on bombast and commercialism. Of course there are exceptions, but I’m talking trends, generalities here. So Sparks was out of time. But they did have the benefit of Rundgren, and ultimately after switching labels to Island, they had a hit, “This Town Ain’t Big Enough for Both of Us.” And they were much bigger in England, but the album “Kimono My House” did gain traction in the U.S. with hipsters and…

Then they reference KROQ, which truly blew up Sparks in America in the early eighties.

And then there was that duet with Jane Wiedlin in the MTV era, “Cool Places,” and then…

HOW DID THESE GUYS STAY ALIVE? WHERE WAS THE MONEY COMING FROM? WHO ARE THEY? ARE THEY MARRIED, DO THEY HAVE CHILDREN?

At the end of the film, Ron says all you need to know is in their records, but yeah, I’m gonna listen to TWENTY FIVE ALBUMS???

To be honest, I almost fell asleep twice in the last forty five minutes. It was just endless. Maels hunker down, change direction, make a new album and are back! Then repeat. This is the whole damn movie. They cover each and every album, it’s for fans only.

If you’re not a fan, you won’t be when it is over, assuming you can get through it.

There are lessons, how if you want to sustain you must change, when the audience, hard core fans, don’t want you to, but…

Beck. Is he really that big a Sparks fan, or is he included just for marquee value. As for all musicians on buses ultimately talking about Sparks, well…no. Absolutely not! As a matter of fact, the only people I know who ever talk about Sparks are the Rhino Records crew, the Jewish suburbanites who didn’t play, at least not commercially successfully, but lived for the music nonetheless. And the Maels had Jewish roots, why not mention that, afraid of turning viewers off, the anti-Semitic? The band has Jewish values. There’s the humor, the desire not to conform, to do it your way, it’s evident throughout but never mentioned.

In other words, “The Sparks Brothers” is totally surface. It’s an amazing surface level job. You’ll see and hear more than you ever wanted to know. But you won’t know how the band fits in context, you won’t know so much!

Making a living in music is nearly impossible. Some of the biggest acts in the history of the industry are working day jobs. Everybody’s got to eat. And even when they’re making their first album, even when they’re on “American Bandstand,” the Mael brothers are living on government assistance, i.e. food stamps. Living only got more expensive, were they on the dole, how can Ron afford that house?

Almost nobody can afford to follow the Maels’ route. You lose your deal. Live business is anemic and…

The Maels stayed home and recorded for six years, not appearing publicly, no albums, no tours… How did they keep going, how did they LIVE?

It pains me to write this ultimately negative review, because I’m a believer, in rock and roll, in the triumph of outsiders. You can love this film on the surface, but is it really that good? It’s made incredibly well, but when you go below the surface? I’d much rather pile on and tell you how great it is, on Rotten Tomatoes it’s got a 95 and a 98. But those are all fans, critics who live in the dark, who are pulling for the underdog. And the truth is most people are not like them, which is why Sparks is relatively unknown underdog, at least to the youth.

But the saddest and one of the greatest parts of the film is the testimony from Gary Stewart, who is no longer with us. I knew Gary, to tell you the truth I didn’t think he was that intellectual, now I know I was wrong. But the rock and roll dream ended for Gary, there’s no place for an A&R guy in his sixties, he ran out of jobs and then…

So I’m not saying you shouldn’t watch “The Sparks Brothers.” If you’re a fan, it’s a must-see. And if you’ve got the desire, go for it. But if your time is limited but you’re susceptible to hype, don’t go there. Or watch the first half. I won’t say I want my entire two and a half hours back, then again when I finished it it was dark out and the afternoon was gone.

Hell, I’d like to do a podcast with the Maels, find out who they really are. But maybe they wouldn’t even open up with me. Especially now that I pissed them off by not granting a vigorous thumbs-up to their movie. But I still want to know their story. Really, how did they SURVIVE?

P.S. Will they stop releasing these rock docs in theatres? That’s when they get all the buzz, and when they finally hit the flat screen there’s no noise, I didn’t know “The Sparks Brothers” was on Netflix, I stumbled on it. You want to start the entire audience at the same time, so we can talk about your project, cultural currency is what you’re looking for, which is the hardest thing to achieve these days. You’ve got to make the barrier low. As for going to a theatre during Covid? NO WAY!

Trailer: https://bit.ly/3F9nCdB

It’s a cultural issue.

I’m not a snowboarder. Back in the aughts, when it looked like snowboarding might put a stake in the heart of skiing, I said it was a religious issue, kind of like being a Jew, I wouldn’t switch because I wanted to preserve skiing. I still do. Although in the interim things have changed. Snowboard sales are down. Then again, do we trust statistics? You certainly won’t believe them if you ride the slopes of Mammoth Mountain. In California, it’s all about snowboarding, it’s a direct descendant of the skateboard culture.

And I could tell you all the ways snowboarding sucks. Needing to buckle in after every lift ride, sitting in the snow while you do it, I’m always waiting for these wankers. Yes, I’ve got a ton of friends who snowboard, maybe more than who are skiers! And we constantly give each other crap, because it’s the low level rivalries that help us preserve our identities, which make up this melting pot we call America. You don’t want everybody to look and feel the same, you don’t want to homogenize the country, but we do all need to get along. Which at this point skiers and snowboarders can do, unlike in the late nineties and early years of this century. You see snowboarders were seen as young upstarts who wreaked havoc. And it’s hard to argue with this, especially having been hit by a snowboarder under Chair 15 at Mammoth. Let me set the scene. It was late in the day, on a wide slope. I was all the way on the right, coming down from Chair 9, and on the complete other side was a snowboarder, far away, but this guy aimed right at me, came across the slope and hit me! He didn’t stop, and after picking myself up and skiing straight down to the bottom I popped off my skis and ran down to the pickup truck he was trying to escape in. I yelled YOU HIT ME! And this beefy, bearded guy rolled down his window and said…DO YOU WANT TO MAKE SOMETHING OF IT?

Ah, that’s life. Especially amongst men. Strength and intimidation. And the funny thing is if you don’t stand up to people, they needle you more, take advantage, but that’s got nothing to do with Jake Burton.

Who grew up upper middle class, tried to make it on Wall Street, hated it and moved to Vermont to make snowboards.

Oh, everybody lies, everybody says they grew up poor. Don’t believe anything anyone says on the surface. Go deeper. They say they were just like you when they weren’t, and hope you’ll believe it, won’t give them a hard time, but Jake Burton is not the only person who did this. Everybody lies. It’s a rare person who tells the truth! I remember Daryl Hall saying in “Rolling Stone” he was the best singer out there, the blowback was loud and fierce. Then again, things are different now, everybody’s a braggart, that’s the hip-hop ethos.

So, Burton moves to Londonderry and tries to perfect the snowboard. And on one hand you can see this film as a business story, his gumption, his drive, his success, but that wasn’t that interesting to me. Another guy with a dream who succeeded, how about all the people who didn’t? The odds are long, you have to sacrifice everything to make it, and most people don’t want to, and most people don’t make it, so… Don’t look for business lessons in Jake’s life, because you’re not him, only you, and you’ve got to find out what is special about you and emphasize that.

So, snowboarding starts to get a bit of traction and Jake blows it up. Hires a guy to go from ski area to ski area to get them to allow snowboards. And then the sport hits critical mass.

This is where the contrasts begin, this is the culture I referenced at the top of this screed. Snowboarding gets to the point where it shares the floor with the ski business at a trade show, and the atmosphere couldn’t be more different. On the ski side, it was quiet, everybody was wearing a jacket and tie. On the snowboard side? Shaggy hair and casual clothes. And loud music and beer. It was night and day.

This is what killed rock. This is what allowed Shawn and Sean to revolutionize the music business with Napster. The powers-that-be were asleep, and assumed things would stay the same forever.

Not that Jake’s vision doesn’t get superseded. He models snowboarding competitions after ski racing. He thinks he’s making headway, but then the nation is exposed to the west coast style, with its halfpipe a la skateboarding, and he had to turn on a dime. Don’t be too afraid to flip. Then again, everybody’s so deep in their position these days. It’s like the Republicans who voted for infrastructure, now they’re ostracized. Then again, this is the problem the Republicans have at the core, their refusal to change. Turns out most people want change, they want improvement of their lives, and when you shut it down you lose in the long run.

Like the ski industry. The more they battled snowboarding, the more kids wanted to do it. It’s the ski industry that forced the choosing of sides. It could have embraced snowboarding, but NO!

Rock was long in the tooth. Even to this day. It’s formulaic, with its inane outfits, it’s for a small coterie. And this coterie wanted nothing to do with hip-hop, which was new and fresh and had a nascent culture building around it. I mean Guns N’ Roses comes back on the VMAs and Axl Rose has had a facelift, he immediately dated himself right then, he was in the rearview mirror, because he was no longer authentic, trying to be Peter Pan when regular citizens don’t have that option.

And I won’t even bother to retell the story of the music business and file-trading. You sued your customers because they were taking advantage of a better distribution system than you were offering? That’s the history of the music business, it was brought into the future by Steve Jobs and Daniel Ek, and if you keep saying how great CDs are you’re no different from a Republican.

And why does Jake Burton love snowboarding so much? BECAUSE OF THE FREEDOM! Not the freedom to refrain from being vaccinated, but to be out there cutting your own path in the snow with no one telling you what to do. And Jake’s goal was to board a hundred days a year, every year. If it’s in your blood, you feel the same way, I certainly do. I used to ski a hundred days a year, now only forty or fifty, and it’s not enough, I want that hit of freedom, I want that FUN! I mean you sit at home, inactive, and I feel sorry for you, because when you’re out in the mountains you feel so alive.

And the truth is snowboarding might be better for powder than skiing. There’s only one plank. But skiing has got it all over snowboarding when it comes to moguls, never mind flats. Then again, snowboard boots are so much more COMFORTABLE!

But I don’t want to get into the specifics, if you’re a skier or snowboarder you know all this, and have discussed and argued it, and if you’re not, you probably don’t care. That’s the hardest thing to do, to get someone to go skiing or snowboarding. Just like it’s hard to get people to listen to your music. But once you get that feeling of sliding on snow…most people can’t get enough of it.

So Jake builds an empire and…

Oh, one more cultural thing. A guy gets a patent for the snowboard and afraid of being sued, Burton buys it from him. And then Jake starts charging his competitors a royalty. AND ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE! Doesn’t matter if he’s gonna give the money to charity, it’s opposite the culture of snowboarding, which is about being in it together, not being cutthroat. So, Jake stops charging. It’s never too late to do the right thing, even though we live in a culture today where everybody just doubles-down.

So I don’t care if you’re uninterested in snowboarding, you should watch this documentary. Because the same rules apply in so many walks of life. Oppress people who are a bit different at your peril. And the culture is never static, it’s always changing, evolving. To quote the bard from Minnesota, he not busy being born is busy dying.

P.S. Everybody in the movie looked like me! As in nobody wore a tie, looks and dress were secondary to what’s inside, what you do. If you’re gonna be on camera in L.A., you hire a stylist, you get your look on. Meanwhile, Jake’s wife Donna looks like she rolled out of bed not long before and is now testifying. It’s the hair. Out of style, not shaped, but to her it doesn’t matter. That’s what living in Vermont is all about. I’m watching this film and I feel at home, living in Vermont changed me, and I’ve never recovered. I went to Middlebury with my suburban school clothes and then I stopped wearing leather shoes, only wore jeans, you’re affected by your experience, where you live. I think dressing up is b.s. Black tie events? Who are you trying to impress?

P.P.S. Speaking of clothing, snowboarders wore loose clothing, whereas skiers wore tight clothing. End result, EVERYBODY ON THE HILL NOW WEARS BAGGY CLOTHING! If you’re wearing tight clothing, form-fitting, stretchy, you’re laughed at.

P.P.P.S. Oh, did I mention that Donna went to Barnard? And Jake graduated from NYU? Don’t judge a book by its cover, it’s what’s inside that counts. Believe me, I know, I live in Southern California where image is king, the town of two-dimensional phonies with no portfolio.

P.P.P.P.S. Jake Burton was a beacon, a leader, that’s what we lack in America today. People who think different who hew to their path and inspire others to follow them. We’ve got nobody like this in politics, and when the young people want change, they’re told it’s too progressive, and they must forgo their interests, move to the center, for the good of… Exactly who? Give the Republicans credit, they went where their voters were and still are. The corporations no longer run the Republican party, rather it’s the blue collar that’s got all the power. Religion, guns, anti-abortion, anti-immigrant… The politicians give the voters on the right exactly what they want. But on the left, NO! The left has to be Republican lite, as if the voters on the right can be convinced to switch parties. You want to know how to get someone to switch? Just live a life so rich they can no longer sit on the sidelines. You don’t need to tell people what to do, they’ll jump ship themselves! The original rappers didn’t tell white suburbanites they had to become infatuated with hip-hop, rather these old rock fans wanted to go where the excitement was! Yes, that’s right, one guy who made snowboards knew more about America than the politicians. Because he was in touch with the experience, he was about purity, not compromise. And these values never go out of style. Want to win? Be singular. Don’t care what everybody else says. Do what feels right. Be a leader. But be sure to watch the parking meters!