Last week there was a technical snafu and we had to air a rerun.

Tune in today, July 5th, to Volume 106, 7 PM East, 4 PM West.

Phone #: 844-6-VOLUME, 844-686-5863

Twitter: @lefsetz or @siriusxmvolume/#lefsetzlive

Hear the episode live on SiriusXM VOLUME: siriusxm.us/HearLefsetzLive

If you miss the episode, you can hear it on demand on the SiriusXM app: siriusxm.us/LefsetzLive

Trailer (but don’t watch it): https://bit.ly/3OFxpNN

I don’t have conversations like that anymore.

I don’t think anybody my age has conversations like that anymore.

Growing up is weird. Because you don’t realize you’re doing it. Oh, you’re eager, to hit double digits, to be a teenager, to have your twenty first birthday, to graduate from college, but after that it all runs together, the years keep passing, your features change, but you don’t realize it. Oh, in retrospect you’re aware, but on an everyday basis? No.

Your twenties.

It’s about having a real relationship, maybe your first, certainly your first out from under the wings of your parents. You’re making your own money, you’re living independently, you might be focused on your “career,” but really it’s all about friendships and love relationships in your twenties.

The first change is when you graduate from high school. So many of those people you never see again, even your best friends fade away. You develop new friends at college, and some of those sustain, but really it’s about the new people you know, who you have relationships with for years, maybe not love relationships, but friendships, that may not seem as deep as the ones you had in college, but these people you can depend upon, they come through for you, unless you’re a bad picker of friends.

Oh, you can be one of those who accumulates friends, who feels good about themselves because their Rolodex is full, but in truth, one good friend is enough. You know, the one you call when your parent dies. The one who knows who you are. The one who’ll be there for you.

But not enough people have this friend.

Or let me say they got older and the game changed and…

People start to get married, they peel off. And if you’re not married too, if you’re alone, you may still get invited, you may still get calls, but you’re an outsider, sometimes you’re invited but you don’t even want to go, because you don’t want to impose, you don’t want to feel like a fifth wheel.

And then those people have babies and make a whole new set of friends. And then so many of them get divorced.

Meanwhile, you’ve found your own path. Or maybe you haven’t. You don’t want to end up alone. I wish more people knew this. The older you get, the less meaningful the game becomes, it’s all about shared experiences, even more that there’s someone there for you, who’ll listen to you.

Everybody’s going through changes, it’s rare that people are on the same page as they age, until they get older, truly old. I’ll put that at 67. There’s no way that number is not old, you can’t convince yourself otherwise. For some reason 66 is different. 60 is bad in its own right, because that’s when you learn the game is b.s., you’ve seen the trick, you realize you’re going to die and what happens in between birth and death better be important to you, because it’s unimportant to everybody else.

There are people who think getting plastic surgery, dressing in young clothing, hanging with young people makes them young, but this is a lie. Because biology doesn’t know any of this. You may say forty is the new thirty, or sixty is the new forty, but in truth forty is forty and sixty is sixty.

But the dirty little secret is your perspective changes whether you want it to or not.

So, in your twenties you’re free and easy. You dread thirty, which ends up not being that bad, and for a couple of years thereafter you’re cool, but then you can see forty on the horizon, do you really want to hit that alone, do you want to have a baby, do you want to..?

But in your twenties you’re feeling it out. You stop feeling it it out in your late thirties and by time you hit the fifties, that paradigm starts to truly wither.

You want to get to know people, you want to connect, you want to know what life is about. And this is different from staying up all night b.s.’ing in college. Because now the stakes are real. And since you realize no one is paying attention, no one is keeping score, that there are no more grades, your life is ever more private. Even in the era of social media. What you share with another person… That magic is only between the two of you.

And you know when it happens.

Sometimes you feel the spark but it doesn’t catch fire, or the kindling starts to flame but then burns out. Keeping the fire going is not easy, and it’s all about sharing, being honest. And if you can’t do this, you’ll never have a relationship, at least not a satisfying one. Can you appear weak? Can you put forth your hopes and desires? Can you admit your failures…

There’s a whole language involved.

It starts with looks, and touch. And I don’t mean beauty, what I mean is the look the other person gives you, that they’re paying attention to you, that they’re connected.

And then you go exploring. And it’s a bumpy road. It’s dreamy at first, but everybody comes to connection with baggage. You can keep it light for a while, but then when you get down to the real nitty-gritty… A lot of people are hesitant, for the engine of the relationship to continue to purr one person has to continue to push, oftentimes self-consciously, drag the other person forward, keep them involved. And you keep building and building and…

Sometimes it flames out. Sometimes the fire is gone, but you stick together, endure the inertia, because it’s too scary to break up and go it alone, try to find someone better.

This sharing, this connection, is life. And you so rarely see it in today’s art. This is what the movies USED to be about. And you occasionally see it in streaming TV. This is what music was built upon, but braggadocio and saccharine narratives have superseded songs straight from the heart.

So I mentioned the Duplass brothers last week, and someone e-mailed me that I had to see “Language Lessons,” that it was on HBO Max.

We finally finished “Golden Life,” and it was too late to start another series, so we dove in.

All the values in today’s movies…absent. All the production values, the special effects, the whiz-bang…gone. As a matter of fact, most of the film takes place over the internet, via Skype, or Facetime, it’s not exactly clear, but it doesn’t make a difference.

I always want to know who someone is. That’s the most important thing to me. That’s why I prefer to talk to girls, because they’ll reveal their story, they’re comfortable digging down deep. Guys? WHY DO YOU WANT TO KNOW? Although you’d be surprised what guys will tell you if you ask and don’t interrupt, people love to talk about themselves.

And usually the connection happens when you don’t expect it.

This movie is about the connection between Adam and Cariño. It’s bumpy, but so is real life, fast and slow. But while you’re watching your mind will drift to your own experiences, you’ll see your whole life laid out, you’ll jump from age to age. I saw my thirtieth, fortieth and fiftieth birthdays. I saw how I was different. I’m different now. If for no other reason than the glass is truly less than half full.

And most people my age…

They don’t even want to go out. There’s too much traffic, it’s a hassle, it’s too crowded. Whereas when you’re in your twenties, you live to go out. You’re dying to meet new people. You’re eating up life.

But even if you stay this way, other people do not.

Sure, there are some couples who stick together and appear to cruise, but if you get them to open up, you’ll find out that their marriage has been far from smooth, or is laden with problems that one of the partners may not even see.

And then there’s tragedy. Not only do your parents die, but sometimes your friends. Everything is so random. And those who don’t pay attention and take care of themselves…

You can live without health insurance in your twenties and get away with it. But after that?

And without insurance, without dental appointments, there’s attrition on the body, and like Warren Zevon you may find out too late that your demise is imminent. And bodies are like cars, they’re not made to last forever. Yours is gonna break down, they all do.

Yes, you wake up one day and you realize life has moved on. Hell, Mark Duplass is now in his forties, he’s got gray hair, he’s no longer the young sprite. There comes a time when you can no longer be the new thing. There’s always someone younger who comes along to replace you. We’re all gonna be replaced. And we’re gonna take so many of our icons and cultural references with us. You used to care about the stars, now you don’t even know who the people on the cover of the magazines are. Then again, in the internet era, most people don’t know who they are!

But to watch “Language Lessons” is to feel alive. To feel human. To be optimistic. To know that the loss of a person is so much more devastating than it’s usually portrayed, both on screen and off. Because like I said, most people only have one, and when that one person goes, not only are they gone, but so is your main artery of support.

So I’m watching “Language Lessons” and it’s not always riveting, then again, neither is real life. And you’re not quite sure where it’s going, which is also like real life. But the twists and turns tug at you, you become invested, and when it was all over, I turned to Felice and said THAT WAS AMAZING!

Spotify: https://spoti.fi/3aa6NVY

YouTube: https://bit.ly/3yALDK6

1

I didn’t buy “Rattle and Hum.” By this time I was burned out by the U2 adoration, by their constant presence in the press, the testimony of Generation X which embraced the band the way their forebears, the baby boomers, embraced the Beatles, and the endless play on MTV. And the reviews were not positive, the backlash had begun, only recently when hit acts are so much smaller have top acts been able to withstand the blowback of being number one. Once you’re on top, people are gunning for you. It’s hard to remove yourself from the fray, and how you react to this is evidence of your character. To bite back in the press shows signs of weakness. To repeat what you’ve done before is punting. but to walk into the wilderness, to try and create something new and different, that takes chutzpah, and that’s what the greats do. And sometimes they’re ahead of not only of the audience, but their bandmates, like Brian Wilson with “Pet Sounds,” but that was a different era.

I was a huge fan of U2’s first album, “Boy.” It came out in the fall of 1980, the same year that radio station in Pasadena, KROQ, decided to retool its format under program director Rick Carroll. The new format maintained the irreverence but now it was a Top Forty station of the alternative, it was the heartbeat of Los Angeles and within a few years the heartbeat of the United States, when its programmers and deejays ended up with prominent positions at MTV.

So previously KROQ had been a free-format station, akin to the late sixties monoliths. It was a club, with a poor signal, and either you were hip to it or you were not, if you believed in the alternative, before that word became a radio format in itself, if you wanted to expand your horizons, KROQ was where you went.

The new KROQ invented alternative. One can say that the first alternative radio was aired on college stations, but those were run by amateurs, and those at KROQ were definitely professionals, worried about advertising, which still drives terrestrial radio. Also college radio stations tended to have weak signals and no formatting, no playlist, and organization can help you ascend the ratings ladder, familiarity can breed contempt, but it can also breed love.

So I first heard “I Will Follow” on KROQ. There was a press buzz. I bought the album and loved it. As bright as the single was, the rest of the album was an exploration, was not bright and sunny, in-your-face, but dark and mysterious. It was great.

But the second LP? “October” was considered to be a dud. There were no good reviews. And there was no airplay, not of any significance in Los Angeles. But “Gloria” did get spins on the nascent MTV, which launched only two months before the LP was released. As for the song being titled “Gloria”… Some songs are so iconic you don’t want to employ their monikers. “Gloria” was a Shadows of Knight hit in the U.S., and by this point, more than a decade later, everybody knew it was a Van Morrison original. But Van is Irish…then again, from Belfast, not Dublin. As for employing famous titles… Does anybody even remember that Katy Perry number that employed the title of the iconic Beach Boys song?

But then U2 retooled. They seemed to realize they’d gone in the wrong direction, and once you lose momentum in the music game it’s hard to regain it, another disappointment would be a stake in the band’s heart.

On “War” the songs were catchy, starting with “New Year’s Day,” the first single. The darkness was excised, the band decided to evidence its power. “New Year’s Day” was a bridge between the seventies and eighties. It had the heaviness and propulsion of seventies rock with modern sounds injected. “New Year’s Day” was the kind of song that got your noggin nodding, you couldn’t sit still, you were immediately locked into the groove. Then came “Sunday Bloody Sunday.” U2 became the biggest band in Los Angeles, almost overnight. “War” was everywhere, even traditional rock stations, as well as the pioneering KROQ.

Now if you refer to U2 lore, the band truly broke through with a performance at Red Rocks wherein Bono ran around the venue with a flag in the fog, and that performance and the video thereof were very powerful, but not news if you lived in Los Angeles, the band was already big, this was at best a cherry on top.

And then the band decided to take a left turn. They turned away from their partner, Steve Lillywhite (who’d they’d ultimately call in again and again as the years passed), but now they worked with Brian Eno and Daniel Lanois. And everybody was eager for “The Unforgettable Fire,” and “Pride (In the Name of Love)” delivered, it was new and different, yet still U2, all the sounds, especially Edge’s guitar…it ultimately penetrated every hamlet and burg as a result of MTV airplay and its two listen infection. Yes, “Pride (In the Name of Love)” was just different enough to be unable to get it immediately. Kind of like “I Want to Hold Your Hand” if you were around back then. They both sounded completely different from what was on the airwaves, but both took little time to adjust to, to become your favorite.

“Early morning, April 4

A shot rings out in the Memphis sky

Free at last, they took your life

They could not take your pride”

It won’t be long before Martin Luther King is excised from the history books, at least in Texas and Florida. False pride is on parade amongst the ignorant doing their best to hold people back, taking away their freedoms one by one. As for one man who can change the course of history in a good way, we’ve got no MLKs, no one is willing to sacrifice that much.

Except for the more subtle “Bad,” the rest of “The Unforgettable Fire” was not as good as “War.” You didn’t hear as many tracks on the radio. It’s not like you forgot about U2, but they didn’t sit heads and shoulders above their peers, where they’d resided previously.

Then came “The Joshua Tree.”

If you talk to the aforementioned Gen-X’ers, this is the apotheosis, the best album of their generation, to the point where U2 instantly became an oldies act by performing it in its entirety a few years back. In truth, “Joshua Tree” wasn’t as accessible as “War,” but what had been started with Eno and Lanois on “The Unforgettable Fire” had come to fruition, the songs transcended the sounds, and there was more majesty, it was more obvious.

If anything, the real problem with “The Joshua Tree” was it was too successful. I mean if I have to watch the band plying the streets of Las Vegas one more time in the video for “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For”… The title actually became employed in jokes, too often with the band as the butt. But having said that, albeit overplayed, “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For” is one of the great tracks of the eighties, it needed no video, you just had to drop the needle, back when we still bought vinyl, and luxuriate in the sound, the track loped along like a ride on a white stallion in the dark, it both made you smile and set your mind free, you were happy, but not mindlessly so.

U2 had recaptured its mantle as the biggest band in Los Angeles. But now U2 was the biggest band in the land, on the globe. And the band, especially Bono, embraced this. And did we really want to listen to this guy? I mean how experienced was he? And he seemed to have no sense of humor about himself. So he was ripe for taking down. And with the overblown “Rattle and Hum” he and the band were.

2

In reality, “Rattle and Hum” was just the soundtrack for a movie, nearly a throwaway, but the audience was ready to pounce, they wanted to punch back, tear the band down from its throne, enough already!

Nobody was waiting for a U2 album. And the band was not providing one. They went away. We had a bad taste in our mouth. We expected them to fade away, as most acts did after reaching an unfathomable height.

And by time they deigned to return, music had moved on. Hip-hop had made inroads. Attention was elsewhere.

And then came “The Fly.”

Because of U2’s prior achievements, every rock radio station in the land immediately added the track, and you heard it and scratched your head, HUH? What was this? It certainly wasn’t a one listen smash. As a matter of fact, you didn’t even need to hear it again, didn’t really want to hear it again, it was a button-pusher.

There was no word of mouth. The album came out to little fanfare. Just another band past its peak doing god knows what. And then…

It was Christmas Day, the Clippers were playing the Lakers in the afternoon. My friend John Ellis got tickets, in retrospect amazingly good, just under the basket, well, a few rows back.

And he’d purchased a Q45, back when that was seen as competition for the LS400, before Infiniti fell behind Lexus in the Japanese luxury race.

And by this time, cars had CD players. And I was sitting in the back seat and traffic to a ball game in Los Angeles, anywhere, is always bad. Which meant I had to listen to “Achtung Baby,” because it’s almost impossible to have a conversation between the front and back seats when the music is playing.

I asked John what album this was, because the music didn’t sound like anything I’d heard previously, and when he told me “Achtung Baby,” I laughed on the inside, he was still on the U2 train when I’d been smart enough to get off.

But by time the game was over, I was looking forward to the ride back to the Hollywood Hills, listening to “Achtung Baby.”

Yes, it was Christmas, but there was no “Achtung Baby” buzz. I immediately bought it and was on the tip, almost no one else had, I started testifying about it, and then other people started too, and then…

Well, Keryn Kaplan from the band’s management team insisted I come to the show at the Sports Arena and…

It’s one of the three best shows I’ve ever seen (the other two being the Who performing “Tommy” at the Fillmore East and Prince at Flipper’s roller disco).

I mean I could describe it, but…

At this point most people who care have been exposed, but they have no idea what it was really like unless they were there.

Let’s see, we walked into the building, milled around before the show began, and there were Trabants in the ceiling, and there were TVs everywhere, the tube-type, this was long before flat screens, and then the house lights lowered, the Trabants flipped to reveal spotlights and it was a visual assault, all to an indelible soundtrack.

Word got out, ultimately there was a stadium tour, but the buzz, all the action, began indoors.

3

Today when people say they’re a movie buff that means they’ve seen all the superhero movies, they know all the directors, like Michael Bay, how have we stooped so low? Then again, we have streaming television.

Anyway, movies used to be religion. Worthy of college study. And the seventies were considered the greatest era since the thirties, still are. You didn’t go to the movies so much for entertainment as soul fulfillment. There was a culture, you could keep up, you discussed them regularly.

And sure, you had to see American movies, but real fans also kept up with the foreign flicks. There was Truffaut and the French New Wave. And if you missed them the first time around, you went to the revival house. You clicked the films off your mental list. We were completists.

Which meant we went to the Fox Venice to see Wim Wenders’s “Kings of the Road.”

I don’t recommend it. Then again, if you could pause it… It was, and probably still is, just five minutes shy of three hours, and at the time such long movies were far from de rigueur. And did I say it was SLOW?

But I got a notch in my belt.

And then I got another when I went to see “The American Friend.” Such that when Wenders’s first American film was released years later, 1984’s “Paris, Texas,” I could say like with “Stripes” and Tito Puente, I’D BEEN WATCHING HIS MOVIES FOR YEARS! Yes, there used to be bragging rights in being there first. Back when the world was comprehensible, when we were all in it together.

Not that Wim Wenders was a household name. And “Wings of Desire” was not as big as “Paris, Texas,” and by time “Until the End of the World” came out in ’91, I was done, I skipped it. Then again, I was broke.

And when I looked at the track listing of “Achtung Baby” and saw #4 was entitled “Until the End of the World” I laughed. I mean this was a cheap shot, naming your song after a Wim Wenders movie. Yes, the album came out months subsequent to the film, and there was no internet to tell me the song was actually written for the film, and there was no ink in the rock press telling me so, at this point the music press was getting dumber and dumber, writers didn’t know who Wim Wenders was, never mind write about him.

Now at this point most people, at least those conscious thirty years ago, know “Mysterious Way” and “One.” But you’ve got to know, once upon a time “Achtung Baby” was brand new, and got little airplay, so when you purchased it, now on CD, vinyl and tape were passé, you were unfamiliar with it. And you know how it is listening to a new album, you’re waiting for it to reveal itself to you. It’s usually one track. Quite often the opener, or the second side opener, back when there used to be two sides, maybe even the side closers. The albums didn’t come with travel guides. I mean sure, if you were the kind who purchased albums as a value proposition, after they already had a few hits, it was different, but for true fans, every album was an adventure.

And I’d like to tell you that “Zoo Station,” the band’s opener, is inviting, but if anything it’s a warning to stay away. Yes, U2 was almost pulling a Neil Young, defying people’s expectations, going rough and scaring away all but those truly interested, willing to spend the time to dig deep.

And the opening of “Even Better Than the Real Thing” is rough and raucous too, more like “The Fly” than “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For.”

And I don’t remember getting hooked by “One” right away, but “Until the End of the World”…

Sure, there’s the screaming intro, so many of “Achtung Baby”‘s tracks started off scary, off-putting.

But then there was that buzzsaw guitar. Back when guitars were the hooks, before it became beats.

“Until the End of the World” hearkened back to the old, but was still positively new, it was Edge’s guitar, in a more palatable song than “The Fly.” And Bono’s voice, going up and down the notes, the track is hypnotic, and just when you’re starting to fade away, here comes Edge once again to wake you up.

And the instrumental break was like space lasers popping around inside your brain, you were just a pawn in the game, a definitely futuristic one you wanted to participate in.

But you were always brought back by those guitars, and Bono’s exclamations.

All this is to say “Until the End of the World” broke “Achtung Baby” open for me. It got me started. I had to hear it again and again. I started with it and let the CD play thereafter. To the point where I ended up loving “The Fly,” which also depended on an Edge lick, more driving and intense, less hooky, more out there, but therefore you were ultimately levitated even higher.

I peeled the layers of “Achtung Baby” away from the middle, track by track, jumping from one song to another, discovering new favorites, realizing this was definitely not what had come before, this was a revelation, a great leap forward, the biggest band in the land had reclaimed its throne, DID EVERYBODY KNOW?

I’m still not sure they do. They keep talking about “The Joshua Tree.” But the audience certainly did warm up to “Achtung Baby,” the live performances helped.

4

And then came “Pop.”

Everybody was waiting for the next statement, for their minds to be blown, “Zooropa” was not seen as a real album. But “Pop”…

You see rock is a meat and potatoes format, driven from the bottom up as opposed to the top down. If you appeal only to the top you become a critics’ band, you might even get into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, but most people don’t know your music, and with the Hall gone pop, and even hip-hop, good luck getting Television into the Hall of Fame, never mind Bad Company. Which is all to say that the audience couldn’t understand “Pop,” U2 had pushed too far. Was Edge gay? There’s no humor in rock, right? I mean maybe there’s Frank Zappa’s “Valley Girl,” but…

In other words, U2 was smart and the audience was dumb. And the audience moved on. They were interested in a new U2 album, but by 1997 hip-hop was firmly established, grunge was even long in the tooth, the public was ready if U2 delivered, but perception amongst the hoi polloi was it did not. The “Discotheque” video turned off more people than it turned on, they were not ready for a new Village People.

One could say the “Discotheque” video, the entire album, was a misstep, but this was not Billy Squier listening to outsiders tell him what to do, ruining his career overnight with one video, this was planned cheekiness, this was humorous intentionally, but once again, most of the audience had no sense of humor.

Then U2 blinked. 2000’s “Beautiful Day” seemed like nothing other than a raw desire to have a hit, to be back atop the charts. Sure, the track was catchy, but the message was obvious, the whole thing stunk, unless you were one of the dumb people who didn’t get “Pop.”

And then…

The entire world blew apart. No one was interested in what U2 had to say, what any rocker of yore had to say, any rocker at all! The internet blew a hole in the traditional music business, and U2 didn’t seem to get the memo. It was still operating on old school rules. The advance publicity, the hype… To a point where the albums were denigrated before they were even released. As for Apple paying them for their new LP and then foisting it upon all its users, what a miscalculation. We live in a pull economy, but Jimmy Iovine, Apple’s “guru,” was too far from the street, to the point where he’s now retreated completely, and the band was so into creating a first when in truth the real first was when Radiohead allowed people to download “In Rainbows” for free, I mean didn’t U2 have enough money?

And then Guy Oseary convinced the band to do the “Joshua Tree” tour, which is even worse than “Beautiful Day,” once you start giving people what they want you’re dead. At least artistically. You don’t see Dylan performing “Blood on the Tracks.” And he keeps releasing new music. Confounding us with standards and… Sure, many have gotten off the train, but you’ve got to give him credit, he’s still exploring, he’s still an artist, when U2 has given up the ghost.

Can U2 reinvent itself? Does anybody even care?

First and foremost they’d have to realize they’re smaller. No one has purchase on the worldwide state of mind, NO ONE! Acts will tell you they do, the old school press will tell you they do, but they don’t.

So are you a celebrity or an artist?

A hit machine or an explorer?

Are your eyes closed or open?

One thing is for sure, with “Achtung Baby” U2 were artists exploring with their eyes open. Which is why it’s legendary, the best album the group ever produced. Will it last until the end of the world? Well, the end of the world seems closer than ever before, so maybe!

Spotify playlist: https://spoti.fi/3NIYT3A

1

So I was driving down Sunset listening to Lou Simon’s program on Volume 106. I remember exactly where I was, at the Burlingame intersection, where the light is so short but it’s too often red. And a guy called in to talk about Harry Chapin’s “W.O.L.D.” And he keeps remarking how he only got it decades later, what the song was about. And I’m chuckling on the inside, feeling ever so superior, until this dude continues and says that the call letters stand for OLD! I never caught that, you can learn something every day, at least I can. And I can’t get over “W.O.L.D.,” I keep telling people about it. A song I heard incessantly on the radio I just didn’t fully understand.

So I was driving up La Cienega, to go to a pharmacy that turned out to now only give covid vaccines on Thursday, and this was Friday, and I’m both steaming ahead and slowing down. You know how they tell you to pick a lane and stay in it? I was in a rush, and in truth I kept changing lanes to my advantage.

And I was punching through the channels, it was early for me, before ten, and one of them was the Bridge, the SXM adult rock channel, the KNX-FM of today. Oops, you don’t know what I’m talking about. KNX was a soft rock station, way to the left of the dial, when there were five album rock stations on the FM band in Los Angeles. You could always find something to listen to. And that’s where I first heard Bruce Hornsby and the Range’s “The Way It Is,” and had to immediately buy the album to hear it upon demand.

So there’s nothing they’re going to play on the Bridge that will alienate you based on its loudness, its intensity. Then again, there are certain tracks I never have to hear again, like “Southern Cross.” As a matter of fact, this overplayed track was on the 1982 CSN album, ‘Daylight Again,” when in truth it all ended with the comeback album from 1977, a complete surprise. It wasn’t as good as the first two CSN(Y) albums, but little could be, to this day. But the LP started with “Shadow Captain,” and it had “Cathedral” and “Dark Star” and “I Give You Give Blind.” Of course it contained the hit, “Just A Song Before I Go,” but that’s another track I never need to hear again.

And it also contained “See the Changes.” This is the best song on “CSN.” It’s almost a sequel to “4 + 20” from “Déjà Vu”.”

“Ten years singing right out loud

I never looked, was anybody listening?

Then I fell out of a cloud

I hit the ground and noticed something missing”

We think stardom will solve everything. But this was ten years later, from “For What It’s Worth” to 1977. And, to quote that old song, “Where is the love?”

“Now I have someone

She has seen me changing”

Having someone is everything. You don’t want to be on the endless road and come home to an empty house. As for the groupies, the women on the road, they don’t really know you, and sex is secondary to a relationship.

“And it gets harder as you get older

And farther away as you get closer”

Little did Stephen Stills know. The older you get what is in the distance gets even further away, it’s so hard to keep striving for what you want, most people give up.

But Stephen Stills had credibility. David Gates and Bread had none.

Well, that’s not completely true. You see Bread was on Elektra. Which put out far fewer albums than its mainstream competitors. If it was on Elektra, it was worth paying attention to, there was a reason behind the signing, just like with Knopf and books. It may not ultimately deliver, but you know there was thought behind the signing, more than pure commerciality.

And I remember my friend Keith telling me about Bread. Back in ’69, when the initial album came out. When we had no idea who David Gates was, never mind the fact that he was nearly thirty. He’d heard the act on WBAI, the public radio station, that played Phil Ochs and left field acts like the Fugs, it was the thinking person’s FM station.

And then came “Make It With You.”

2

I was stunned they played it on AM radio, that it was a hit, after all the band was singing “make it with you,” which in the era of free love, of personal exploration, I could see as nothing other than a desire to have sex. That was what we all wanted to do, make it with another person.

And this was in the era when they still banned songs from the radio, for being salacious.

But “Make It With You” was a staple on the radio that summer, of 1970.

It was released in June. And records ran up the chart quickly, or they didn’t. And if they connected, their run at the top was relatively brief, that’s how fast the charts ran. You see if you had a hit, everybody soon knew it, and by time everybody was sick of it, there was something to replace it. It’s vastly different today, where it’s nearly impossible to get known. And even if you’re a radio #1 most people still don’t know you. With so much in the channel, everything moves slower, it’s like there’s molasses gumming up the works, and the end result is so much smaller.

But back in 1970, music ruled.

Let’s see, Eric Clapton’s solo debut had just been released, and Dave Mason’s “Alone Together.” Oh, “John Barleycorn Must Die” came out on July 1st. Funny how these albums have sustained, and so much recent stuff has already been forgotten. The first Clapton album, which was considered to be a commercial disappointment, a mild success…my favorites were “Easy Now” and “Let It Rain,” which both got radio airplay. But who knew “After Midnight” and “Blues Power” were forever?

But you were always exposed to AM radio. Because this was before the ubiquity of FM radio, before every car had it. Many cars had 8-track tape decks before FM radio. And a lot of the early auto FM radios had poor reception. Which is all to say you knew the AM hits, from driving in the car if nothing else.

Now I’m looking at the WABC charts, and “Make It With You” never made it to #1. It entered the chart at #22 the week of June 16, 1970. Moved up one spot the following week and was up to #13 the week of June 30, 1970. Then #8, #7, and the week of July 21st, it was #2. Number one? Freda Payne’s “Band of Gold.” Anathema to FM rock, it’s a classic we all now love, if we didn’t back then.

The following week, July 28th, “Make It With You” was still #2, but “(They Long to Be) Close to You” by the Carpenters was #1, this was the Downey duo’s first hit. The week of August 4th, “Make It With You” was #3, #2 was “Signed, Sealed, Delivered I’m Yours,” right before Stevie Wonder went on his hejira and became iconic.

In reality, “Make It With You” had a longer run than almost any other song that summer of 1970, that’s how much of a feel good hit it was.

Next for the Carpenters was “We’ve Only Just Begun.” And our stomachs started to turn. This was not what we wanted to hear driving around. The Carpenters were an AM act, and now we knew Bread was too. Both focusing on hit singles, in an album era, they became pariahs.

However history has been rewritten and people say how much they love the Carpenters now. As for Bread? This hasn’t happened yet.

3

Now in truth, the Carpenters  ultimately infected me, I got it in the summer of ’73, with “Yesterday Once More.” I had a job that had me driving a good portion of the day and I yearned to hear MWAH…

And it was the same deal with Bread in 1972. I’d written the band off, but I loved the song “Diary.” I loved the concept of finding the diary under a tree, also the melodic turns, something completely absent from today’s rhythm-driven world. This is what songwriting is about.

And over time, I’ve come to like more Carpenters songs, and I enjoy Bread numbers too, but in truth only two ever resonated, “Make It With You” and “Diary,” until Friday.

“It don’t matter to me

If you really feel that

You need some time to be free”

This was years before the Sting song, we just wanted somebody to love, never mind setting them free.

But in truth I saw “It Don’t Matter to Me” as distancing, he’s letting her go. Okay, a bigger man than me. And in truth, with the bad auto radios of yore I didn’t catch much more of the lyrics, and it was so sappy at the end, I’m not sure I wanted to. But Friday?

“Time to go out searching for yourself

Hoping to find

Time to go and find”

This was the ethos of yore, we all wanted to find ourselves. I remember my mother saying “What if you find out you’re a jerk?” Nobody looks for themselves anymore, unless they’re already rich, have conquered the business world and feel empty inside. But forgoing the money…today everybody’s worried about falling on the wrong side of the economic fence, you’ve got to start early or the fear is you’ll always be behind.

“And it don’t matter to me

If you take up with someone who’s better than me

‘Cause your happiness is all I want

For you to find your peace of mind”

Who is this guy who’s so well adjusted? And thinking there’s someone better than he is? Where’s his self-confidence? Everybody thinks they’re the best their partner can find, at least guys do, and they protect what they’ve got to boot.

As for their happiness…

I mean ultimately I’m cool with them being happy, but really, you put me through the wringer, I gave you enough rope, and I’m hurting and you’re living large, it hurts much longer than people say, MUCH longer.

“Lotta people have an ego hang-up ’cause they want to be the only one”

Once you realize you’re together, you have that conversation…how many people have you slept with? It’s always hard to wrestle with, to digest and accept, if they’ve slept with anybody but you. But please, don’t let them have slept with more, many more than you. You wonder if you’re up to snuff, experienced enough, good enough. And they keep telling you you’re the one, but it’s hard to accept.

“How many came before it really doesn’t matter

Just as long as you’re the last”

This is absolutely true. Then again, I never caught these lines fifty years ago, or in the interim.

“Everybody moving on and trying to find out

What’s been missing in the past”

Now wait just a second! This is a complete twist. He’s not really letting her go, what he’s really telling her is he’s more experienced, she’ll see her fantasies are just that, and she’ll come running back.

This guy is actually being passive-aggressive. The music is so smooth, there’s no hint of anger, but truly this is an angry side. She left him, and it really matters to him!

‘Cause there’ll always be an empty room

Waiting for you”

Wait just a second, he’s not even reclaiming the space in his house, he’s essentially got a shrine to her.

“An open heart

Waiting for you”

This guy is still in love with her, he’s carrying the torch, if anything this song is about imposing guilt in her heart and mind. He’s playing mind games under the patina of niceness.

“Time is on my side

‘Cause it don’t matter to me”

This is so messed up. He’s convinced she’s coming back. And with that mind-set you never move on. He’s not setting her free to experiment and find someone better, she’s letting her out of the house to have bad experiences and realize he’s the best man for her. This is much more “Every Breath You Take” than “If You Love Somebody Set Them Free.”

I had it completely backwards, completely wrong. He’s not an admirable guy, more evolved than me and the rest, he’s actually a mind game playing controlling man who can’t let go. Which unfortunately is too often the case. Men may put up a brave face, but women get over breakups much faster. They talk amongst their friends, they support each other, and move on. Men stew in their own juices. They always think they’ll come back, always.

So what I thought was a mindless saccharine ditty turns out to be anything but. This ain’t a groovy number to be played at weddings. It sounds so harmless, but in truth it’s anything but. The lyrics ultimately evidence the complete opposite viewpoint.

Proving once again that songs we thought were just airy concoctions have just as much meaning as the more raucous ones we hold close to our hearts.

Music… The gift that keeps on giving.