“Pineapple Street”: https://tinyurl.com/5c3vmd4b

As in the book doesn’t demand much, but calls out to you and keeps you reading.

As a matter of fact, once I started, I finished in a day. Because I was invested, I wanted to know how it all turned out.

This is the story of the rich you don’t see in the newspaper or on TV. Not exactly blue bloods, but something in between them and today’s wealthy. The blue bloods inherited their wealth, and downplayed it. In the sixties you could tell them by their khakis, Topsiders and Country Squires. And at this point, after decades, in some cases centuries, many were not rich, then again rich yesterday is different from rich today.

Rich yesterday?

You not only went to private school, you went to private boarding school. And this school set you up to get into an Ivy League college, or close to it. There’s a big story about affirmative action in today’s “Times,” as a result of the policy:

“By the early 1990s, affirmative action helped boost the percentage of Black Americans in medical school by a factor of four,”

https://tinyurl.com/4u5kcw8t

Do you want to go back to the old system?

Actually, that’s exactly what the rich and powerful would like, to close the doors and leave you out. If everybody starts on the same line, you’d be surprised who doesn’t make it to the finish, for so many reasons, poor schooling, poor home life…

And now this screed has the wrong spin. I don’t want to write a diatribe here, but to give you an idea of the book without telling you so much that you don’t need to read it.

You see the Stocktons made their money in real estate. And they want to preserve this wealth. They don’t want to dip into principal. Do you even know that concept?

I hear it again and again from friends. They fret about their income, take Social Security early, forgoing thousands on the back end, because they don’t want to dip into their principal, which in some cases consists of double-digit millions.

They don’t want to kill the core nest egg. Do you have a nest egg? Let me hip you, you want one, start saving now. Did you read that story about…

“Violet Carson married her high-school sweetheart in a small North Carolina town and raised two children in a three-bedroom ranch.

“When her husband died a decade ago, her children expected their mom, then 78, to follow soon after. She had Parkinson’s disease, Lewy body dementia and required 24/7 care.

“‘Never in my wildest dreams did I think she would last until she was 88,” says her daughter, Teresa Wyche. Violet died last July.

“The Carson family spent more than $1.3 million taking care of Violet at her home over the last decade. Fortunately, she and her husband had saved, and the family could cover the cost of round-the-clock in-home care without going into debt.

“Many people aren’t as well positioned.”

“‘We Thought Within a Year, She Would Be Gone.’ When Mom’s Care Costs Over $1 Million. – Caregiving costs are rising as people live longer and their needs increase”: https://tinyurl.com/3xn56upf

Too many are worried about dying early and sacrificing “their money” to the government. They’d be better off worrying about living too long.

But if you know people like the Stocktons, you know all this.

And if you don’t know people like the Stocktons, you probably stopped reading this diatribe long ago, and probably don’t even read books.

Amazing what books will teach you. Fiction even more than nonfiction.

But this is why you go to an elite college, to have contact with these people. Otherwise, you live in the dark. I went to college to find multiple people who came from the same town I did, but I’d never known them or of them or of their families. You see they never set foot in a public school.

So the question arises, can the poor or middle class be happier than the rich? There’s nothing worse than being broke, then all you can think about is money, but assuming you’re a bit more comfortable…

Those rich people in the press living it up, those are not the people I’m talking about. These rich want privacy, and they don’t party to the extreme. And they don’t have to work and if they do they often get the gig because of who they are. Amazing how many times you can fail if you’re connected.

So Sasha is from Rhode Island and middle class. She meets Cord in a bar. They get married.

And Cord’s two sisters can’t accept her. Partygoers think she’s the help. All she is trying to do is please her in-laws, but no matter what she does they won’t accept her. Furthermore, ultimately Cord’s loyalty is to his family, not his wife. He can’t understand her frustrations. He just tells her to get along. That’s what these rich do best, get along, at their clubs and…

“Pineapple Street” is a very easy read, a very engaging read, and it will make you think about your place in society, your choices. You’re reading for more than plot, and you never feel like your time is being stolen.

It’s not heavy, and it’s not dreary, and if you’re looking for something to read on vacation, or if you’re a voracious reader who finishes books in a day, I highly recommend it.

And then we can talk about it.

You don’t always pay in cash.

I remember the first time I flew on a private jet. On the return trip I was told not to sit in a certain seat. That’s when I learned, he or she who pays, or owns the jet, determines the seating policy. And believe me, you’re thrilled to be on board, so you just shut up.

I’m not going to tell you the circumstances of that trip, but I will tell you I’m not going to say anything negative about the people involved. Oh, I could, but then I would have broken the code, I’d never have access again, they might not even speak to me again.

You see I know these billionaires. To be in their orbit…let’s just say there’s a lot of largesse. But it’s clear that they go first. And if you want to have access to all the perks, you’ve always got to be upbeat and nice, get on their wavelength, and I O.D.’ed on it.

I hate rich people, because they think they’re entitled.

And by the way, those are two different sets of people in the above examples. You see it’s about access. Something that the hoi polloi don’t have. You can get it, but you’ve got to earn it, even though so many of these rich people have not.

Then again, there are those who have. And my belief is if you start the company, you’re entitled to the riches. You must pay taxes, but if you make a lot, more power to you.

But if you just work for the corporation?

How is it when Michael Eisner retired he was the largest shareholder in Disney? You work for the company, and then you own the company?

And then there’s Michael Rapino. Very talented and very skilled, a good guy, and I have a good relationship with him, he’s always been open and honest. But I must say when I read yesterday that Live Nation shareholders disapproved of his $139 million 2022 compensation…

Yes, the shareholders can censure you, but they have no power. The board can do whatever it wants. And the board is made up of club members…talk about not going against the code. And they’ve all decided that they’re He-Men of the Universe and entitled to these riches. And if one person is getting paid all this money, another person should. But it’s an especially bad look at Live Nation. Bottom line…Michael Rapino makes more money than almost all of the acts Live Nation promotes. Think about that, think about how hard it is to make it as an act. And don’t be confused by the grosses, the net is much smaller, after costs and commissions and the split if there’s a group. Like I said, Rapino is very skilled, but he could be replaced. Can you replace Elton John or U2? We’ve been waiting for sixty years for a new Beatles and they’ve never arrived. Ditto on Dylan. But think of how many people have run entertainment companies.

There’s Lucian Grainge, who made triple-digit millions. Believe me, Universal Music would not go out of business if he suddenly retired. Once again, Lucian is skilled, and affable to boot, and he brought the company to market, however… Universal is ultimately based on what the artists generate. And as one big exec legendarily said, the business model of the major label is theft. If you think you get honest, forthright accounting, you’re delusional. And you have to sue for your money and you never get a hundred cents on the dollar, even if you deserve it.

But Rapino and Grainge can just point to their contemporaries, the CEOs of public companies. They too are handsomely paid. But traditionally, entertainment executives are disproportionately compensated.

And believe me, it’s hard to make this money. Not only as an entertainer, but an executive. Rapino comes from Thunder Bay, a place most Americans can’t pinpoint on a map. And he worked his way up from the bottom. And most people are not willing to work that hard, are not that driven, but should this huge income gap between not only the haves and the have-nots, but between the comfortable and the super-rich, exist?

So if you’re just wealthy…

Well, what is wealthy. Some might say 450k a year.

But let me give you perspective, that’s chump change. The “Wall Street Journal” said today that lawyers now make more money than bankers. Managing directors at banks make between $1 and $2 million a year. Partners at law firms? $3 million. Some make $15 million.

May sound like a lot, but it’s not. You can’t own your own jet with that money. Maybe if you’re doing really well you can get a NetJet account.

But you want to hang with the people with the private jets. And even in that there’s a pecking order. You own a G6, right?

Believe me, it goes up and up.

You see those prices in Aspen, in Malibu.

And you’re competing against all those tech billionaires.

So…

If you know these people… Most of them want to hang with their contemporaries, those equally rich. But they do have civilian friends. And when you’re offered the perks, can you say no?

Most people cannot. It’s a matter of character.

I now say no. I mean if we’re really friends, maybe. But ask if you’re really friends with these people to begin with. Especially the idle rich, who don’t work, who drink and party much of the time. You’re a hanger-on, a little buddy, how does that make you feel?

Now I’ll never have their money, but I do have a modicum of power. I’m exercising it right now, by typing. But the more truth I tell, the fewer perks I’m offered.

I’m slamming doors left and right. I’m willing to lose the perks. I don’t want to lose my ability to speak the truth. Power is more important to me than money. 

But that is not the case with most people.

Alito. Clarence Thomas. They want to live like rich people but they don’t make enough money. So they trade favors. Do you think Paul Singer would be taking Samuel Alito on a fishing trip to Alaska if Alito wasn’t a Supreme Court Justice? It’s not like they grew up on the same street, played ball together. Ditto Harlan Crow and Clarence Thomas.

In truth, Alito and Thomas are chumps. They’re so caught up in their self-righteousness, their status, that they can’t see the truth. How do you think these billionaires make this money? Not by going to law school and playing by the rules. They’re looking for an edge. They’re business sharks. They want to know everybody in power and be able to lean on them and trade favors.

And it’s not an obvious quid pro quo. It’s not like I’ll do this for you and you do this for me. No, it’s an investment, that is cashed out at some indeterminate time in the future. And you can’t say no. Oh, you can say no, but the door is then closed. And it’s not only that door, these billionaires are connected, have friends.

But they don’t have to say anything. You see you’ve been bought and paid for and ultimately you realize it. You can’t say no. They were so nice to you, and they took you on this trip!

And the height of hypocrisy is when Alito says it didn’t affect his judgment. Believe me, I’ve been in these situations numerous times, AND IT ALWAYS AFFECTS YOUR JUDGMENT! It’s subtle, but it’s definitely there.

You see almost everybody is beholden to the buck. That used to be the essence of the rock star, he was independent, did what he wanted to, was beholden to no one. Threw TVs out the window and had the road manager peel off hundreds to pay for the damage.

Rock stars used to be amongst the wealthiest people in America.

No longer.

And this pisses them off. They want more. So many play the venture capital game. Or they too live off the largesse. Believe me, the billionaire will let you use his jet for a price, and it’s not in dollars.

You see income inequality is not about raw cash. It goes much deeper than that. Money buys influence in ways most people can’t see. It’s subtle.

And it ain’t easy to say no.

I started saying no because I didn’t like the way it made me feel. Hollow, like a second-class citizen. Always needing to be a sycophant.

But I can’t say most people are like me.

And having said that don’t think I turn down all offers. Because those people, the rich people, they run the world. Especially those who earned it as opposed to inherited it. They know where the bodies are buried, how the game is played. That time in the air on the private jet? Pays more dividends than a year of business school. You can get the owner, the provider, to tell you their story, they love to wax rhapsodic. You can’t convey the information you’re told to the public, but you can use it personally. You see you now have perspective.

As for using your relationships, asking for favors… WHAT HAVE YOU GOT TO OFFER?

Most people ain’t got much. Oh, you’re a musician, you can give a private concert. Big deal. They get this kind of favor all day long. Everybody has a price. But for some the price is much higher, and once again it’s not paid in cash. What have you got to trade?

If you’re a Supreme Court Justice you’ve got much.

Just by going on the trip, being the beneficiary of the largesse, you’re in the reality distortion field, do you really want to hobble these people, tax them, hold them back?

I mean we can’t even get rid of the carried interest rule.

And most people have no idea what that is, which proves the point, they’ve got no idea what is really going on, they’re not even aware of the game, never mind how to play it.

But whatever faux pas Alito and Thomas have committed, it doesn’t matter, because they’re supported by their team. And the team is not the general public, the justices are above the public, they care about those who can offer the perks. They don’t want to live like hermits. But isn’t that the essence of being an arbiter? To be alone and unswayable? Doesn’t that go with the job?

So it doesn’t matter what the blue team says, because the red team supports you.

Trump appears to have committed crimes, but his support remains strong. And if the world is really this topsy-turvy, why should you have scruples, why should you leave money and opportunities on the table. Everybody else is doing it, why shouldn’t you?

They do.

Jack Tempchin wrote “Peaceful Easy Feeling,” hear how it ended up on the first Eagles album. Tempchin also wrote “Slow Dancing,” as well as co-writing “Already Gone” with Robb Strandlund, “You Belong to the City” and “Smuggler’s Blues” with Glenn Frey, and composing “Someone That You Used to Know” for George Jones. Find out how Tempchin navigated the waters from San Diego to Hollywood, as a solo artist as well as a member of the Funky Kings.

https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/9ff4fb19-54d4-41ae-ae7a-8a6f8d3dafa8/episodes/a1b69084-f79f-4b16-b7a7-a4be6cc6bbe1/the-bob-lefsetz-podcast-jack-tempchin

https://www.stitcher.com/show/the-bob-lefsetz-podcast/episode/jack-tempchin-304663107

https://tinyurl.com/yc3anpmh

This book is mind-blowingly good.

But you won’t feel that way at first, you’ll think it’s a trifle, a direct lift of “Saturday Night Live,” akin to Curtis Sittenfeld’s book about Hillary Clinton, “Rodham,” wherein she breaks up with Bill before marriage and a different story ensues. I mean “Rodham” is a good read, but it’s light.

Whereas “You Think It, I’ll Say It,” Sittenfeld’s collection of short stories, is oftentimes dark, and gripping. “You Think It, I’ll Say It” is the best short story book I’ve ever read. I keep recommending it to people but they don’t read it, primarily because they’re turned off by short stories, and I understand that, but this is different.

Anyway, I read everything Sittenfeld writes. Beginning with her debut, “Prep.” I’m a sucker for these boarding school tales. Can I tell you that I love “Dead Poets Society”? Although I went to public school, I went to college with a lot of prep school students. Prep school changes you. Teaches you how to fit in, but when eyes are looking the other way, no one is wilder than a prep school graduate.

So “Romantic Comedy” is Sittenfeld’s new one, released in April. I haven’t felt the buzz, but it’s got four stars on Amazon with thousands of ratings, so people are reading it, I just don’t find people talking about it. Because…

People don’t know how to talk about love. Or they don’t want to, it makes them squirm. Yet it’s what all of us want, so it’s a conundrum.

So Sally is a writer at “Night Owls,” the late night sketch comedy run by Nigel, who’s a direct lift of Lorne Michaels. She’s been there for years, and how she got there is very interesting, I won’t spoil it, but let’s just say you’d be surprised who doesn’t understand your dreams, never mind support them.

And Sally doesn’t want to be on camera.

And she’s divorced, but she’s got a f*ck buddy, she has needs. And she’s 38, and she’s not planning to leave the show and then…

A rock star is the host. And the musical guest. And he comes in with his own sketch, and Sally helps him hone it.

One of the big themes of the book is whether you can date out of your league. The guys at “Night Owl” run with the female celebrities, but can the women? If you’re average-looking can you date a gorgeous celebrity? Sally even writes a sketch about it.

So, Sally feels something from the rock star, Noah, but does he feel it too? And I’m not talking about the Peter Frampton song, then again it’s not a bad soundtrack, because the song is ultimately optimistic, which is what you’ve got to be to fall in love.

So Sally is reading the signs. But is she the only one reading them? Does anybody else notice them? Can she even discuss them with anybody else?

You don’t want to snuff the inner flame, you don’t want people to laugh at you, so you suffer…

And then, when it looks like something might happen between Sally and Noah, when she’s about to find out if he really is into her, she unconsciously says something to push him away. This is not uncommon, I’ve done it. I’ve had tons of therapy to analyze it. Now I’m aware. But ultimately, the anxiety gets to you and your instinct is to go back to your happy place, alone, even though it’s not that happy.

And then…

Correspondence begins during lockdown, and…

This isn’t much different from how I met Felice. I met her, felt something, wasn’t sure if she did, and then months later we connected via fast and furious e-mail and then…

This is the way romance is in the twenty first century. I’m not talking about Tinder, I’m not talking about married couples, I’m not even talking about young ‘uns. But once you’ve been around the block, Sally’s been married, been hurt a few times, how do you navigate the waters? Get old enough and people become afraid to jump in. Sally is not that old.

There’s so much wisdom, baked in to this easily read book. It’s anything but heavy, but then again it is. It’s the anti-Iowa Writers’ Workshop book, you know, rewritten to impress fellow writers, as opposed to writing something the public will truly enjoy reading. Maybe that’s why there’s not more ink on “Romantic Comedy,” because the intelligentsia, the publishing cognoscenti, look down upon it, it’s not dense with incomprehensible adjectives, there’s not endless depiction of the scene, it’s not removed from real life, but rather it is real life.

Yes, you can read about real life, but it’s not the same as living it.

And I was just about to quote some truisms from the book, that struck me, but now I’ve decided not to, I’ve already told you too much.

Once again, if you’re addicted to nonfiction, don’t read this.

If you’re a guy… You’re on your own. Chances are you never talk about this stuff and maybe can’t even own it yourself. You’re so busy bucking up, being one of the guys, a bro, that you can’t be sensitive. But you’ve got to be sensitive to have a relationship, a real one.

If you’re a woman, I think you’re much more likely to love this book.

Then again, there will be guys who love it and women who hate it, that’s what makes the world go round.

And I’ll save further clichés, I’ll just say that “Romantic Comedy” sits with me in a way other books do not. I can relate to it. I think the writer is not that different from who I am, she understands me.

And she just might understand you too.

Check it out.