Satellite radio has not been the same since Lee Abrams’s departure.

I don’t want to be an apologist for Mr. Abrams, but that sluts video that got him fired at the "Tribune"…he was Dixie Chicked.  There was no uproar at first.  It was all after the fact.

Not that I believe the "Tribune" staff shouldn’t have been fired.  Radio guys running newspapers?  Isn’t that like baseball managers becoming football coaches?

But what made Mr. Abrams so great, so effective at XM, was his elimination of all the radio b.s., the shuck and jive, along with "Stairway To Heaven" and "Free Bird" and all the burned out tracks that we never need to hear again in our life.  XM was made for fans. And fans built it.

Until Hugh Panero destroyed it by failing to make a deal with Howard Stern.

And now the Sirius brass is in charge of satellite radio.  And all the lame bumpers, all the stuff that appeals to no human being but consultants think is necessary, is stuffed into the cracks, along with all the tuneouts.

But not on every station.

I can no longer sell satellite radio.  Whereas I used to be a free evangelist.  But that was eight years ago, a lifetime in the media world.  But I still listen, because it’s better than anything else, but not as good as it could be and once was.

Which is an extremely long introduction to telling you about tracks I heard on the Coffee House yesterday.  Hell, that’s an original Sirius station.  And it’s not cohesive, it’s got jive bumpers, but every once in a while I hear a song that elates me, changes my life, if only for a few minutes on the highway.

Like "Marry Me".

I was a huge fan of Train before they started swinging for the fences.  Do you know "I Am" and "Free" from their debut?  You should.

And now I’m a fan again.  Because "Marry Me" is exquisite.

It’s not my favorite song on this subject, that would be Don Henley’s cover of Larry John McNally’s "For My Wedding" on "Inside Job".  Still, the feel, the vibe of "Marry Me" is what music does best.  It’s wistful, it’s personal, it penetrates you because it’s so simple.  Don’t even bother to listen to the lyrics, just marinate in the sound.

Eventually I heard "When I Was In Your Heart".  After my doctor’s appointment.  I haven’t gotten David Gray since "White Ladder".  He changed his sound, the records were slick, they didn’t touch me in the same way.  But this???  If you were ever a fan, check this out.  It’s almost creepy, you almost want to leave the room.  It’s like you stumbled on your best buddy alone in a room and you just can’t handle the raw intensity.  This isn’t reflection, David is still feeling these feelings.  And nothing you say to him will be able to soothe him, to make him lighten up and forget.  This is so honest, so real that it almost scares you.

But right after that Train track, I heard a cover of "Love Me Do".

That’s a cheap shot, right?  Covering the Beatles?  Covering anybody?  But this version was rearranged just enough to be different, and to add insight.  I mean "Love Me Do" is one of the simplest Beatle songs, from the very beginning, it’s sing-songy, it’s about the rhythm, the sound.  But Lisa Lauren’s version is also about the lyrics.  Suddenly, I got them, in a way I never did listening to the original.

Lisa Lauren?  Who’s that?

I e-mailed myself her name.  And just Googled her.

She’s not famous enough to have her own Wikipedia page.

But she did work with David Sanborn…come on, he’s GREAT!

And "Love Me Do" is from a complete album of Beatles covers. Which I pulled up in Spotify (they were in Spotify??)  Then I played "Dear Prudence".  It had the same magic of "Love Me Do"…  It was just different enough to be enticing.

The Coffee House is all acoustic music.  Usually live takes, although all three of these are studio originals.  You won’t hear any of this stuff on Top Forty radio, but that doesn’t mean it’s not great, that it’s not worth your time.

It’s like we’re living in 1968 all over again.  All the good stuff’s on FM, AM is a wasteland.  If you hate today’s music, I get it.  Because the mainstream stuff that’s being jammed down your throat is too often crap.  Did you read Jon Pareles’s story about the minimalism of today’s tracks in last Sunday’s "New York Times" ("Want A Hit? Keep It Simple": http://nyti.ms/fwWn3N)?  Pretty soon, a track will just be a shout.  Or a beat.  Or a yelp. Something a consultant can point to in callout research to get those not playing by their guts to program by.

But we know better.  We know it’s all about your gut.  It’s about feeling.  It’s about thought.

Play this shit.  It’ll turn your head.  You won’t be able to say there’s no good music anymore.

"Marry Me"

"When I Was In Your Heart"

"Love Me Do"

"Dear Prudence"

4G my ass.

So T-Mobile doesn’t invest in infrastructure, ending up behind the 8-ball, they decide to label their lame high speed network 4G.  Oh, they tweaked it a bit, but the improvement is evolutionary, not revolutionary, like Sprint’s Clearwire or Verizon’s LTE.

Yes, Verizon is going to have the iPhone.  And every user of that platform would abandon AT&T instantly if it were not for contracts, both individual and family.

But what’s worse is the ignorance.  Of just how bad AT&T service is.  It’s kind of like the political situation, I can argue the concepts if we agree on the facts.  But if you insist Obama wasn’t born in America and flaunt fake costs for his trip to Asia, how are we going to debate the issues?

AT&T sucks.

The only people who don’t know are those who use it.

Then again, some people know.  That’s why AT&T was dead last in the "Consumer Reports" rankings.  Dead last.  Do you hear me now?

I used to be on AT&T.  Because of their national one price coverage.  But then I switched to Verizon and was stunned when I could hold a phone call from downtown to the beach, an impossibility on AT&T.  When I’m on a call and the person on the other end is on AT&T and driving over the 405 I know it’s just a matter of time before we disconnect.  There’s no AT&T service there.

There’s no service in so many places.  But how does AT&T counter this?  By saying service is imperfect for all providers.  That’s true.  But that’s like saying all cars break down, so your Yugo is as good as a Mercedes.  Oops, they stopped importing Yugo in the U.S?  If they changed the name of AT&T to Horrible Service, or even one of those no-meaning monikers like Exxon or Accenture, it would fade into oblivion.  You see, AT&T sells on brand name. Which is why it’s so hard to go solo after being a member of a group.  And why the warhorses can tour profitably and the unknowns are struggling.

So I’m sitting on the Eagle Bahn and Andy tells me he’s got no 3G on AT&T.

There ain’t no stinking 3G on Vail Mountain.  Unless you’re on Verizon, where you  can get 3G all the way back in Blue Sky.  Where Felice’s nephew had no service at all on his iPhone, and therefore we couldn’t connect and he had to ski alone.

I’m in the condo and AT&T slips to EDGE.

But the worst is today.  I’ve got no service in my house.  Oh, I had service, but then I lost it. What did the screen say, the call FAILED?

And there is no 3G in my house, needless to say.

But how do I know all this?  You thought I was on Verizon?

I am.  But BlackBerry sent me a Torch, since I beat up the company so badly.  And the Torch doesn’t work on Verizon, so they sent it with an AT&T SIM card.

What a piece of shit.

That’s AT&T’s network, not the Torch.  The jury is still out on the Torch.  The touch screen functions much better than the abhorred Storm, but I don’t really get the slide out keyboard…is it the ridges on the edge that make it hard to use?  And the apps are cool, but they keep failing BECAUSE EVERYWHERE I TRY IT AT&T’S SERVICE CRAPS OUT!

And having failed to invest in its network, being the laughingstock of the cognoscenti, AT&T decided yesterday to label its lame, works well in places you can get it but those are rare, 3G service as 4G.  Yup, just like that.  No technological improvement, just new branding. Huh?

Verizon’s LTE is screaming.  And it’s here today.  In 38 cities and 60 airports.  You might get AT&T LTE in a few cities at the end of 2011, as for ubiquity, you’re gonna wait a few more years for that.

Verizon invests in FIOS.

AT&T just keeps saying how great it is and doesn’t improve its network, not much.

Like I said, I’m not on AT&T, not usually.  But I just can’t understand why tens of millions are.  Are they just that fucking dumb?  And you international travelers…I’ve used a multi-band BlackBerry on Verizon for years, you can travel overseas.

Do people really not know the service sucks?

If people don’t know AT&T sucks, what does this portend for our country?  Do people really think Wall Street banks care about consumers and are investing in our country?  Do people really think Justin Bieber is good?  That Katy Perry is the biggest star in America?

We live in one big disinformation economy.

And I just don’t get it.

Will you switch to Verizon so I can talk to you?  Even Sprint?

Will you stop telling me how great your AT&T service is?

And even if you don’t talk, and fewer are every day, will you at least go to Verizon so you can see what surfing at high speed on your mobile is really like?

I mean how can you debate the app economy if you’re on AT&T?

It’s like debating the merits of MP3s when you’ve only listened to 78s.

I’m positively stunned.  SWITCH!

Consumer Reports cell-service Ratings:
AT&T is the worst carrier

AT&T Pins 4G Label to Existing Network

In 4G Race, Verizon Pulls Ahead With Pricey Speed

Maybe he’ll get it right next time.

You had to buy "City to City".  For "Baker Street".

Famous for Raphael Ravenscroft’s solo, that was not the song’s only magic.  Starting like a sunrise, evidencing the hope that only music can exude, "Baker Street" is as good as any movie ever made, yet it’s a record.

That’s the power of music.

And as happy as the music sounds, that’s not how the lyrics start out…

You used to think that it was so easy
You used to think that it was so easy
But you’re tryin’
You’re tryin’ now

Isn’t that what growing up is about.  At twenty you know everything, as the decades pass, you realize you know nothing.  You were confident once, now you’re not so sure…  But you keep on tryin’, until you start cryin’.

If you haven’t been at loose ends by time you’re fifty, you’re doing it wrong.  You just haven’t taken enough chances, you just haven’t risked.  And how these twentysomething artists could get it so right, be so worldly in their younger years, I don’t know. Then again, after flashes of genius, so many burned out.  Or knowing so much, burning so bright, they flamed out, into alcoholism.  Like Gerry Rafferty.

Then again, that was his father’s legacy.  Alcohol.  It’s hard to escape where you come from, especially when you’re unwanted and the only hope and inspiration comes from yourself.

But "Baker Street" ends on an optimistic note.

First there’s the conversation:

Way down the street there’s a light in his place
He opens the door, he’s got that look on his face
And he asks you where you’ve been
You tell him who you’ve seen
And you talk about anything

We call this friendship.  We’re looking for the one true buddy who knows us, who accepts us, but isn’t afraid to call us on our bullshit.

He’s got this dream about buyin’ some land
He’s gonna give up the booze and the one night stands
And then he’ll settle down in some quiet little town
And forget about everything

Is this Gerry’s story?

Unlike today, Gerry Rafferty’s career didn’t begin with "Baker Street".  The gigantic hit came years down the line.  After paying his dues, endless nights on the road…when you’ve worked this hard, you’re shocked to finally break through.  And then what?  How do you cope with everything you’ve dreamed of once you’ve given up on it occurring?

If you think Gerry Rafferty was a one hit wonder, you’ve never heard "Stuck In The Middle With You".  Which seems even more popular than his ubiquitous solo hit today.

But that solo hit was so good, Rafferty’s sound so rich, that I continued to buy album after album, because when Gerry got it right, there was a richness to the sound and the lyrics that embodied humanity…Rafferty’s aural dope was of such quality, it could never be denied, we were always searching for one more hit.

But no more.

Have you listened to "As Wise As A Serpent"?

Now you once asked me why we can’t communicate
But it doesn’t always pay to tell the truth
If I told you right now, you’d only run away
Run away, run away home

Trust is gone.

That’s a horrible place to be.  I’m working my way back from it.  My ex-wife obliterated my faith in people.  You say to never leave, then you leave me?

So we sit in empty rooms and dream our lives away

That’s what’s gone from today’s hit music.  The despair.

You can sleepwalk through life.  You can take no chances, play by the rules.  But the only fun, the only thrill comes from coloring outside the lines.  But with this risk not only comes reward, but disappointment, ennui, desperation and depression.

You hear all of this in Gerry Rafferty’s tunes.  No words can convey these feelings as well as these songs.  That’s the power of music.

It took me years to find all of "Sleepwalking" online.  I had the vinyl, I needed MP3s, that I could take with me.  Because our music, it’s our most valuable possession, nothing else we own can be a companion and touch our hearts just so.

I was waiting, I was waiting…for the day I heard from Gerry Rafferty.  I wrote again and again, about how much his music touched me, how it reflected my life, how I felt the solidarity.

It never happened.

And now it never will.

Gerry Rafferty obituary

Now let me get this straight…

You put the lime in the coconut and drink ’em both together?

You put the lime in the coconut and then you feel better?

I saw in the "Vail Daily" that the Yale Alley Cats were performing at the Four Seasons.

For free.

You see MP3s are not the only thing given away.  Then again, something called the Vail Symposium sponsored the gig, there’s always money underneath, just like you may be stealing music, but you’re paying for bandwidth…

I felt like my mother, a culture vulture.  Everywhere she goes she’s combing the paper, looking for some highfalutin’ event.  Which, of course, leads her to many losers, especially when they’re free.  You see you get what you pay for.

But I love a cappella.

And I don’t think everybody else in attendance was a fan, but they liked the free entertainment.  So the lobby was packed.  To the point where they had to move the second set to the ballroom.

Highlight of the first set?

"Norwegian Wood".

Famous for the sitar, all these years later it’s the lyrics that resonate.  Not only because they encapsulate the sixties sexual revolution, but because they’re the opposite of today’s musical media circus.  Today you kick ’em to the curb.  You get the party started with Pink, puke with Ke$ha and then laugh as you continue to live your meaningless life.  But in "Norwegian Wood", it’s John Lennon who’s left behind, who’s been used.  Great art is about vulnerability.  See any vulnerability in the Top Forty?  I rest my case.

Anyway, I’d love to tell you the Alley Cats kicked ass.  But Straight No Chaser is a whole level of professionalism above.  Still, it’s fun to revel in the magic of music, when it’s not about the money, but the pure sound.  In this case, of fourteen voices.  Singing their piece de resistance, Harry Nilsson’s "Coconut".

He was famous for singing someone else’s song.  Harry Nilsson sang Fred Neil’s "Everybody’s Talkin", the theme to "Midnight Cowboy", after his original composition, "I Guess The Lord Must Be In New York City", was rejected.

That established a trend.  Nilsson’s biggest hit was written by Badfinger.  Not that anybody heard it, it was off the second Badfinger album, "No Dice", most people believed it was a Nilsson original.  Now most people believe Mariah Carey wrote it.  But that’s ridiculous.  Mariah Carey can sing, at least she used to be able to, but she can’t write a decent song.  Argue with me all you want.  I wish her luck with her twins, but she’s almost already been forgotten, because she stands for nothing more than melisma and excessive boob jobs.  Ooh, let the hate mail begin!

So, Nilsson was in the wilderness both before and after his "Midnight Cowboy" hit.  Didn’t matter that he wrote "The Point" and covered Randy Newman, only hard core fans were buying.  Until…

"Without You".

This was 1971.  When you assumed the album would be a good companion to the single.  Unlike today, when the album is seen as a bloated statement made to make money.

And when people played "Nilsson Schmilsson" they were exposed to a three dimensional personality.  Unlike today’s Top Forty beat-infused music, which all sounds the same, because it’s made by the same people, the cuts on "Nilsson Schmilsson" were wildly different.  In some cases outrageous, always engaging.

"Gotta Get Up" was not a single, but is one of the greatest album openers ever.  Imagine an artist taking your hand, imploring you to jump from your perch and go for an exquisite adventure, a veritable magical mystery tour.  Some people turn on the TV and watch the "Today Show" when they wake up…try dropping the needle on "Gotta Get Up", it’ll wake you up, it’ll give you a peek into an era when we pooh-poohed TV and lived for music.

And the follow-up, "Driving Along", with its acoustic guitar and engine starting…

How do I explain this?  That this former bank teller could not only write but sing in a multi-dimensional voice that exhibited a three-dimensional personality.  Lock "American Idol" contestants up with "Nilsson Schmilsson", erase the one-dimensional Mariah Carey from their memories.  It’s not about showing us your c.v., it’s about what you do with it!  In other words, Bob Dylan may have a fraction of the voice of Ms. Carey, but he does a whole hell of a lot more with it.

Then there’s "Early In The Morning"…

I hate the dawn.  It’s the beginning of a new day.  When I haven’t quite escaped the last one.  You’re thinking about the evening that’s past, the alcohol consumed, the things that were said.  You know how the light enters behind the curtains, that’s what this track SOUNDS LIKE!

Now I’m not gonna delineate every single track, I’m not gonna beat you over the head.  I’m just gonna say "Nilsson Schmilsson" was an album when people didn’t only consume from one trough, when you could love Zeppelin and this singer/songwriter/crooner too.  When people lament the loss of the album they’re reminiscing about shit like this, not the bloated seventy minute CDs compressed to the point they sound like space artifacts, electronic detritus that makes you cover your ears.

But, of course, "Nilsson Schmilsson" contains "Coconut".  The song the Alley Cats performed last night.

It’s one of those songs you hate the first couple times through.  Then you can’t get it out of your brain.  At random moments someone in your party quotes a lyric.  Then you realize you love it, it bonds you with your buddies, it makes you feel good, it makes you feel fully alive.

"Coconut" sounds like nothing else on "Nilsson Schmilsson".  Can you take that risk?

OF COURSE NOT!

Do it the way they tell you to, don’t break any rules.

Or else you’re doing it your own way and you suck.

Harry Nilsson did not suck.  He put in his 10,000 hours.  You’ve got to have all that experience in order to throw off excellence.  It’s when you’re totally skilled, when your confidence is wailing instead of waning, that you can come up with gems.

Once upon a time our musical stars were artists.

Artists are those people you stayed away from in high school.  They were not captain of the football team.  They were not class president.  They were brooding loners, or they ran in alienated packs.  And they never complained about their outcast status, they just laughed at you grade-grubbing, playing the popularity game.

And after graduation, the cheerleaders had babies and got fat.  The athletes got middle-aged spread and boring jobs.  The smart people worked themselves to death making money, raping and pillaging our society, trying to erase the abuse they got in high school.  And the artists?

The artists flowered.

We were only interested in their work.  We wanted to see the movies and plays and hear the music of those who were just slightly skewed, who didn’t play the game, who truly thought about life.

Today an artist is a loser.  Because he’s POOR!  And our country is solely about money and…

Put the lime in the coconut and drink ’em both together…

Life is about the simple moments.  The euphoria of beautiful weather.  The sensation of eating chocolate.  Hearing the creation of a great artist.

How did Harry Nilsson come up with this?

I’d love to tell you I know.

But I don’t.

That’s the power of artists.  

And frequently they can’t even explain it themselves.

But when we hear their work, we swoon.

Yale Alley Cats "Coconut"
Click on "Our Music", fifth choice on left
Scroll down to "Coconut", the last selection, and click "Launch Track"

"Nilsson Schmilsson"