I went to a show and it took all my willpower to refrain from dipping into my pocket and checking my iPhone.

An e-mail would be nice, or a text, but in my fingertips I hold a personal link to the entire world, and this has changed not only my behavior, but that of the entire globe.

We used to put stars on a pedestal. Now they’re vehicles for put-downs. If you’re famous, you’ve been abused online, it goes with the territory.

And if you’re having a “digital free” day enjoy the analogue to camping but there’s nothing wrong with the new paradigm and it’s never going away, it’s only going to intensify.

We were never at the heart of the action. In fact, we had to leave home to participate. Now we can not only watch TV in our lairs, we can surf for dates and dig deep down into our personal interests, chatting with those like-minded all the while. When I went to college with my hundreds of albums in the seventies I was an outcast, I came to Los Angeles and found people just like myself. Now no one is alone, everybody lives in a virtual village of their choosing. And the star is you.

It’s already happened. People won’t leave their house without their device. Forget the baby boomer backlash, decrying the loss of… Actually, it’s a gain. Everybody you ever knew is at your fingertips. You’re more socially engaged than ever before. You can buy goods at the lowest possible price without living in Los Angeles and New York. Virtual connection is a panacea that brings whole nations together and fosters revolutions, and this is good.

In other words, expect people to continue to take photos at the gig. To dial their friends and have them listen in. To check their timeline or feed while the music plays. Because what’s happening in your world is more important than what’s happening on stage. As Sly Stone sang decades ago, everybody is a star.

And our heroes are the enablers. The techies who create this stuff. Disruption is in their blood the same way it was in that of the classic rock musicians. That was their appeal, the way they tested limits, it’s why we’re always interested in a new social network and data has triumphed over emotion, everybody looks at the numbers first.

If they’re in business. But emotion is king in your own personal world. Music is not primary, but part of the ever-flowing background, no different than the wallpaper on your phone. He who realizes enabling the listener is the key to success triumphs tomorrow.

Putting your fan primary does not mean paying lip service to those adhered to you. No, it means giving them artwork and free music and snippets of information, that they revel in, believing they’re truly your best friend.

Yes, the world has been flattened. Everybody’s equal. And if you act differently, you’re going to get mowed down. That’s what’s wrong with Kanye, he’s living in the wrong decade, Jay-Z too, wherein they believe proclaiming themselves rich and powerful makes them so. No, everybody believes they’re rich and powerful today, and if you establish a moat between you and them you’re headed for a downfall.

If you’re in the public eye, humility is key. It’s the essence of Howard Stern’s success. He could go on about how wealthy he is, how he doesn’t fly commercial, but instead he focuses on his foibles, bringing his audience ever closer to him, cementing a bond that cannot be broken.

We’re immune to so much hype and me-tooism because we’ve all tried it ourselves and found out it doesn’t work, that fame online is earned over time, based on the work, which explains why everything that pops up on YouTube seems to die quickly and is never followed up, we view it not as the start of a career, but a wreck on the side of the highway to rubberneck at and then forget.

And it all started with the Internet.

But the final link was the mobile phone. Because suddenly we can take our world with us. BlackBerry didn’t realize this and died. It’s not solely about e-mail, we want EVERYTHING at our fingertips, we never want to encounter a technical glitch, to have a problem with your mobile phone is akin to having a problem with your body, something that is completely untenable.

And it’s only going to become more so. We’re all connected, we’re all primary, and it all happens on the mobile.

The clock ain’t turnin’ back.

What kind of crazy fucked up world do we live in where the commercials are funnier than the program?

One in which Miley Cyrus radiates such intelligence that she blows away the rest of the show.

I’m loath to write about Ms. Cyrus one more time, I don’t want to be one of those bandwagoneers who use her for momentary fame, like Sinead O’Connor, who is truly the poster girl for mental illness, did you see her face tattoos? Ink has been crawling up the neck for about a decade, but once it migrates to your punim you’ve completely lost the plot, you’ve shown that you’ve got no desire to be part of society, or you’re shrieking for help.

I feel sorry for Ms. O’Connor, who spoke the truth to Ms. Cyrus, saying that the music industry is a sausage factory, but why was she so surprised that Miley tweeted back, Sinead’s got kids of her own, and one thing we know for sure is at twenty you believe you know everything and radiate a force field reflecting all constructive input.

But it’s the same parents who are up in arms over the last six weeks of Mileymania. Whether they be perturbed by her twerking or her ability to dominate the conversation with what boomers declare is not music.

I’ve got something to tell those oldsters, we’re living in a pop world. You can spin your Wilco CDs in your Biemers, but your progeny are streaming the hits of the day and reveling in being members of the group.

It would be easier if Miley Cyrus was a deer in the headlights like Katy Perry. Or an old incomprehensible stoner like Ozzy Osbourne. Then we could write her off as a tool of the system. But watching her on SNL you were wowed not by her body but her brain. She read the cue cards better than any cast member. Which is testimony to years on the Disney Channel, but so many TV stars are wooden on SNL and Miley was not. Because she’s smart and she’s talented. And unlike her forbear, Madonna, she comes down off the pedestal and is truly likable.

That’s what oldsters hate about Miley. That she just won’t shut up, recede into the firmament and respect her elders. But that’s what stars do, throw off chains and chart their own path. And their fans follow them.

Miley’s no Justin Timberlake, letting Janet Jackson take the heat for the nip-slip. Justin’s testing no limits, he’s truly safe, he’s an entertainer, there’s no train-wreck, and great rock stars have had a little bit of train-wreck all the way from Little Richard to John Lennon to Boy George to Eminem. It goes with the territory. If you’re not making people uptight, you’re not doing it right.

And SNL had a bit of an edge. It criticized Boehner and the Republicans without a concomitant equal swipe at the Democrats, a taboo in the “fair” media. And Jay Pharoah had a star turn as Shannon Sharpe, it wasn’t so much laugh out loud funny as whoa, watch this guy in action, but it’s been so long since we’ve had a breakout star on SNL that it was thrilling to watch his performance.

But I feel sorry for the telecast. Because in a splintered world there’s very little commonality the show can play off of. Even the hippest youngster is gonna be unfamiliar with so much, there are few frames of reference except for the show itself. Yes, SNL is an institution, but the core is rotten. It’s just a stepping stone to something else, whereas John Belushi and Danny Aykroyd did their best work on the telecast, they were owned by us, not the man.

And it’s hard to tell if Miley Cyrus is working for the man or us because it’s all so calculated and without her musical handlers there would be nothing there. None of these products of song factories can write without their team, and what comes out of the speakers is more akin to cheerleading than inner reflection. Yes, this manufactured music has no soul. Then again, despite having a black President America’s got no soul, it’s a hollow enterprise focused on cash so why criticize Miley Cyrus for being its greatest exponent?

Yes, you’ve seen the immediate future and this is it. A tsunami of press that forces everybody to pay attention for…as long as the “star” can hold their eyeballs. No one takes a break anymore, if they do they’re forgotten. You’ve got to be in the public eye 24/7.

Not that Miley Cyrus can’t sing. But did she really need so many effects and so much on hard drive during her first number?

But that’s today’s music. Despite all the money being in the live performance, it’s all about the record. You can’t take any risk, there can be no mistakes, and that’s why the aforementioned soul is gone. But we’re not looking for perfection, we’re looking for soul. It’s a conundrum that Miley’s life can have jagged edges but her music is slick and polished.

And this won’t be forever.

But until the country revolts against income inequality, expect pop stars to reign. Pop never leads, it follows. It takes the best and the brightest to lead and those people left the building long ago, because music’s not where the money is.

And it’s all about money. Otherwise SNL would do skits about the bleeding edge and force its audience to pay attention and investigate. But the program can’t afford a dip in ratings, no risk is involved in a show that hasn’t changed in nearly forty years.

But it was great once, just like the music that inspired it and was featured on it.

But that was a long time ago.

To the point where tonight the biggest star was the guest host, she blew everybody off the stage, if they were smart they’d beg her to be regular cast member.

P.S. The Ron Burgundy Chrysler spot and State Farm airplane/BBQ grill commercial were more innovative than anything on SNL. Sure, it’s harder to do it live, but the way out is by taking chances, which people do online every day but SNL refuses to do.

P.P.S. Sinead O’Connor face tattoos

Sinead O’Connor shows off B&Q cheek tattoos

Tom Perrotta, “Nine Inches.”

I just finished Malcolm Gladwell’s “David and Goliath.” I wish I could recommend it. But it’s flawed. The concept is not coherent enough and you start wondering re the cherry-picking of examples, I mean David Boies made it because of his dyslexia? And the problem with successful people, like Gary Cohn, whose ascension from aluminum salesman to President of Goldman Sachs is chronicled in the book, is that…people never tell the truth about themselves, especially after they’ve made it, it’s all about the myth, which is unfortunate, because the great unwashed believe the myth and try to emulate and achieve that which cannot be gotten, unaware the game was rigged from the get-go.

But that’s “nonfiction.”

Fiction’s a whole ‘nother animal. Ironically, when fiction is done right, it makes your hair stand on end with its accurate depiction of life, especially inner life.

That’s what we’re all interested in, that’s what life is truly about, what’s going on inside someone’s head. People rarely reveal it, and when they do it comes out in fits and starts and is so often filtered, but life is about the brain not the body, and nowhere is this evidenced more than in Perrotta’s book.

Discovered him by accident. Removing his short story collection, 1994’s “Bad Haircut,” from the shelf of the Santa Monica Library where I used to spend so much time before the Internet hit big and I rarely left the house.

And “Bad Haircut” was a good attempt. But it wasn’t fully-realized. Just another writer trying to find his niche and climb above the dead end of teaching creative writing in college.

Next came “The Wishbones.” Which I didn’t read until six years later but which you should read immediately. It’s the story of a garage band, musicians who never became famous. Not a sanitized film take, but the real story of getting older and playing for your living and what your life is like, it’s exceptional.

Then came “Election.” Yes, the story of Reese Witherspoon’s best movie was first a book, which I read after seeing the incredible flick that seems to have been forgotten but was truly great. In this instance, the film is a bit better, this happens so rarely, like in the case of Michael Chabon’s “Wonder Boys,” yet the book is still satisfying after seeing the movie.

And after the even better “Joe College,” Perrotta broke through, with “Little Children” and “The Abstinence Teacher.” But the problem was that Perrotta was now taking himself too seriously, the books had a heaviness his earlier work did not. He stopped being ours and started becoming theirs, and nothing alienates a core audience more.

And speaking of aliens, Perrotta jumped the shark with a genre book thereafter, “The Leftovers,” about a post-apocalyptic world. It failed. With everybody dashing for cash, writing about zombies and vampires, true readers became unsatisfied…is it about money or art?

And now comes the unexpected “Nine Inches.” Perrotta returning to his original framework, the short story. He went back to basics, like John Lennon recording fifties songs, if he wrote new ones that sounded like the originals instead of doing covers.

But Perrotta is so much better now, he’s got so much more under his belt, it’s the aforementioned Gladwell’s 10,000 hours in action. “Nine Inches” is a master at work.

But it’s getting little traction. Because it’s the genre fiction that’s triumphing and everybody pooh-poohs short stories.

And short work can be unsatisfying…because it ENDS!

You don’t want to read “Nine Inches” from start to finish in a day or two, which you could easily do. You want to savor each story. You truly have no other choice, because that’s how much they stick with you.

Can you convince yourself your present significant other is number one, burying in your mind the one who got away?

The person who appears to have it all together…is that just a facade?

Do we all have hopes and dreams, and are too many of those shattered and unfulfilled?

I’ve already told you too much.

But I will say if you’re not truly haunted reading the title story and “Grade My Teacher,” you’ve got no heart, no soul, and you’re no friend of mine.

Nine Inches

We want to go where everybody else goes.

So I’m reading a story in today’s “Los Angeles Times” about redesigning the Dodger Dog, the hot dog staple served since 1958 that has not changed a whit. Turns out the Texas Rangers have a two pound concoction and Atlanta has a hot dog with cole slaw and pulled pork, and I’m reading this article thinking the writer, Chris Erskine, has a good idea, one that could be implemented easily, but it will get no traction, because very few read the “Los Angeles Times” anymore.

The “Los Angeles Times” punted. Focusing on profitability as opposed to reach, it sacrificed its position as the voice of Los Angeles, its power is now minimal. Instead of cutting back, it should have been doubling down, like Amazon.

Bezos keeps inventing, keeps pushing, keeps reinvesting. His goal? To be the last man standing.

Pandora’s problem is it’s a one trick pony. Apple doesn’t need iTunes to be profitable, it’s just one element of its portfolio. Not that Pandora doesn’t have reach today, but my point is despite all this hoopla about niche, turns out we’re moving towards an era of dominance.

It’s already happened in movies. The studios make fewer than ever. They’ve closed their indie divisions. All they want is blockbusters. Know why? That’s all the public is interested in seeing! Despite all the boomers saying there’s nothing to see, the truth is they don’t go, they’d rather stay home. Which is one of the reasons we’re in a new golden age of television.

But it’s not only in movies, but music. We know who Miley Cyrus is, to the point that even Sinead O’Connor and Amanda Palmer are weighing in on her, but we don’t know much more than the Top Ten, because that’s all most people are interested in.

It’s human nature. We want to feel part of society. We want to be able to go to a party and have a conversation, we want points of commonality, and the enterprises that figure this out will win in the future.

That’s what troubles me about Apple’s upscale mobile phone strategy. Once you start leaving people out, you’re on the road to niche-ville, which can be very profitable today, but can be a disaster tomorrow. Mac sales were not going anywhere until the iPod gained traction. If Apple comes up with a new killer product, the company will continue to soar. Without it, it’s a death spiral.

Take Google. It’s the only search engine. There’s no need to go anywhere else. Google understands dominance.

Apple used to too. That was the key to the success of the iPod. It was the ONLY music player.

In other words, the jump from the minor leagues is bigger than ever. If you’re a profitable niche act, and you’re happy, more power to you, but if you want to go mainstream, if you want everybody to be aware of you, that’s a much bigger hurdle. In other words, while you sit at home railing against the state of pop music, saying this and that band is better, it proves you don’t understand the game. Sure, some people want to go to the small show, but most want to go to the big one, with the major act, which is one of the reasons the club business has died.

If you don’t strive for dominance and maintain your position, you’re doomed. Credit Facebook, it’s the dominant social network. It keeps reinvesting. It doesn’t want to be left behind. It purchases Instagram. It keeps integrating elements invented elsewhere. It strives to be the only place we want to go, because our friends are there!

And just like the iPod, maybe Facebook is not forever, or ultimately its features are subsumed by another entity.

But my point is we’re in an era where we’re gravitating to the bigger and bigger, those playing for all the marbles.

And the public wants this. Because it makes the world coherent, it makes people feel connected. It makes them happy.