London

Lisa’s on the phone with Corinne, so I’m gonna take this moment to check in with you.

1. I miss the 4G in the United States. Never mind the better data plan. I almost switched to my BlackBerry just for this trip, because iPhone e-mail is prohibitively expensive in the U.K. and Europe, especially if you get as much as I do. Anybody got any tips? Of course I turned off cellular data, but when I turn it on, when I can log in, which is rare, I eat up 3 MB every time, and it’s $25 per 100 MB, which means I definitely can’t leave it on all the time…

2. They were playing Damien Rice’s “Cannonball” on the way in. How come the U.S. always has generic Muzak in public spaces, but in the U.K. they can own their heritage?

3. The chips! I can’t even remember the flavor they served on the plane, it was a combination of cream and cheddar and vinegar and despite calling them crisps, the variety’s better than in the U.S.

4. Oh, back to the 3G. I don’t know how you people tolerate it on your iPhone 4 and 4s’s. Here comes the hate mail! You get used to high speed. And they just don’t have it over here.

5. The flight wasn’t long enough. Not long enough to read my book, catch up on the newspapers and sleep too. That’s what’s better about flying to Asia, the time! There was no wi-fi on the plane, but I don’t like to work in flight, I consider it a respite, me time.

6. I’m reading the VJ book. Positively riveting, because we lived through it, great to hear about it from the other side of the fence, even though I don’t trust everything everybody says, especially Martha Quinn, who says she got an “F” in high school but still got into Vassar and Colgate…

7. It’s cold here! I mean not rattle your teeth cold, but fifties. Spring has not sprung in the U.K.

8. I came through Dusseldorf. Bottom line, by doing this I only have to take two flights on the way back, I’m not gonna do twenty two hours and three. Couldn’t see much in Germany, but I wanted to stay, wanted to investigate it, I’ve only passed through on the train previously. I think it’s safe now. Although the in-flight magazine had me researching and I found out about this East German shot-putter who took so many steroids she decided to become a man… Man’s inhumanity to man, all in the name of…sports victories?

9. In customs in Dusseldorf they wanted to know what I was doing in Germany. I said flying to London! The guy was nonplussed.

10. Speaking of customs, they grilled me in Stansted, where I had to land. And I had to wait half an hour just to answer questions.

11. How come the cabs are so much bigger and cleaner in the U.K? You’re always worried about bodily fluids in the cabs in NYC, and you never even ride a cab in L.A.

12. The flight attendants on Air Berlin didn’t know how to use the gizmos, didn’t know how to turn the monitor off and lower the arm rest… A little more training is in order, but it was a good flight, despite taking off an hour late.

13. I feel inadequate not knowing the language. A woman was sitting across from me in the lounge in L.A., speaking English to her kids, and suddenly she burst into German to interact with an elderly gentleman nearby. Reminded me of how many languages Jackie O. spoke. She was my mother’s hero, for being a worldly culture vulture, before she became an Andy Warhol and jet-setting staple. We all need someone to look up to, we all need aspirations.

14. Everybody on the plane from Dusseldorf to London was reading! Physical books, but they also gave away newspapers for free. Furthermore, so many had an element of style, the hairdos, the clothing… American culture is different. We don’t embrace our outcasts, not until everybody else does and they become anointed. And if you’re different in the U.S., you’re doing it to be noticed, to become famous, whereas in the U.K. it’s just part of your personal style.

Lisa’s off, gotta go!

The Stones In Anaheim

Which version do you want? The one wherein creepy old men have trouble playing their own material or the one wherein legendary rock stars remind their audience of what once was and never will be?

The vibe was amazing…

Remember when you used to go to the show and not only were you excited, but you could feel the buzz, it was palpable? Sure, many came in limos, but with security checks we were all in line together outside, reminding ourselves that the seventies were the heyday of our lives, and despite crumbling bodies, we once ruled and our music still does.

There were no young people in attendance. It’s too expensive to take your kids for a glimpse. Sure, there were a few people under drinking age, but mostly it was boomers, with lumpy bodies but eager faces. Orange County isn’t where you go to parade, but experience…

The World’s Greatest Rock & Roll Band.

Only they weren’t.

Give the Stones credit. They’re actually playing!

And that’s the problem… Mick’s giving it his all, he probably needs oxygen and a blood transfusion when it’s over, but Keith is waltzing along, hitting half the notes and frequently unable to play his own signature riffs.

Like “Gimmie Shelter”… How many times did I sit in the dark with my headphones on listening to that eerie sound? Keith just couldn’t get the riff right. As for “Satisfaction”…I’m not sure he’s listened to the record.

But then he’d surprise you and toss off a perfectly executed intro to “Paint It Black.”

So if this was any other band, there’d be a plethora of extra people, behind the curtain, doubling for the faces.

Speaking of which, Ronnie was much better than Keith, but he never fit into the band to begin with, he could never replace Mick Taylor. Who came out and positively blew us away with fluid notes on “Midnight Rambler.” He may look like crap, but he can still make his axe sing! Proving once again, that it all comes down to individuals, you can’t replace an artist, it’s never the same.

But I’m WAY ahead of myself.

The intro movie… Was on such a small screen as to be hard to see, famous people testifying as to the greatness of the Stones. This was superfluous, you can either stand on your own or you can’t. And curiously, during the show the video screen fit the entire stage, making it much more visible…it was not the best Stones stage of all time, you didn’t see it and have your jaw drop, like it did for U2’s 360, but it was beyond serviceable.

But that was what the band was…until the aforementioned “Gimmie Shelter.”

It’s weird, because as buzzed as the audience was before the show, during it they were relatively sedate, there were no peaks, until Lisa Fischer sang Merry Clayton’s part.

War, CHILDREN!

Lisa’s the star of “Twenty Feet From Stardom” and she’s the star of the first half of the Stones show too. She misses not a note, her voice is so powerful, she exudes the sex in rock and roll that Mick Jagger can’t, since he’s dieted down to nothing, you can almost see his bones. What a sentence that must be, being unable to eat so you can fulfill the image of your audience, which has aged itself.

Hell, Lisa was not svelte, but if you think sex is about appearances, you’ve never done it. It’s about a spirit inside. And Lisa evidenced hers.

And the next highlight was…JOHN MAYER!

Yes, he made it on soft rock ditties. Yes, he was overexposed. Yes, he said some stupid things. Yes, he dates every starlet on the cover of “People.” But now that his moment in the spotlight is gone, we can see his legend is deserved, he can truly wail, and he did, on “Champagne and Reefer.”

Don’t know that song?

Interestingly, the three non-hits were some of the biggest triumphs. “Doom and Gloom” was great, and “One More Shot” was almost as good. With our expectations low, with the Stones not needing to live up to the legend, they could stretch out and play.

And that’s where you’d want to see them, a place where they don’t replicate the hits, but improvise, groove, noodle and impart energy. Like a club.

But they’re too big for that.

And yes, as reported, Keith’s voice is better than ever, even though he looks like the crypt-keeper, but he kept pulling his mouth away from the mic, and it’s not like he’s got a phenomenal voice to begin with.

So they’re running through the hits. And some renditions are so pedestrian, you’d wince if you didn’t know them by heart and were somewhat thrilled to hear them live.

“It’s Only Rock ‘n Roll (But I Like It)” was…eh.

“Waiting On A Friend” verged on execrable.

“Emotional Rescue”…Mick did a good job, I’ve got no idea where the band was.

But then came the new tracks and “Midnight Rambler.” Took a while to find the groove, but then the two Micks were off and running, the interplay was fantastic, Jagger running around the ramp and Taylor whipping off fine notes that had the weight of whipped cream but the substance of steak. This was what once was. Sure, Jagger no longer whips his scarf, the lights don’t jump in time, but it all works and you’re happy to be there.

And then comes “Sympathy For The Devil.”

Well, not exactly…

“Miss You” misses.

“Start Me Up” is pretty good, one just wishes it was more than a trifle.

“Tumbling Dice” verges on bad.

Everybody throws his hands in the air for “Brown Sugar,” but thinking back to the dorm room ritual, this was a pale imitation of then original experience.

And then…

It’s unmistakable, because it’s on tape.

The intro to “Sympathy For The Devil.”

And Mick comes prancing out in a coat of feathers and he’s shimmying and Charlie’s hitting the skins and Chuck Leavell is tickling the ivories and you start to tingle and you tell yourself…THIS IS IT!

Yup, classic Stones show. Just when you’re about to write them off, they deliver completely and you’re reminded of not only who they once were, but who you were too.

Jagger’s spitting the lyrics. The whole band is locked into the groove. And it’s not nostalgia, it’s got the power of today.

I was ’round when Jesus Christ
Had his moment of doubt and pain
Made damn sure that Pilate
Washed his hands and sealed his fate

This is rock and roll! Yes, Jagger’s so old he might really have been there, but once upon a time rock was about attitude, not a pose, but a real standing outside the mainstream with your middle finger displayed. And despite this dash for cash, suddenly Jagger is once again that person.

Killed the Czar and his ministers
Anastasia screamed in vain

DANGER!

That’s what the Stones once represented. And now they’re locked on. They’ve transcended the audience. They’re in their own bubble and we’re privileged to be able to observe. And the song goes on, the riffs are torn off, the backup singers contribute, and you’re smiling like you’ve just had your first orgasm, or maybe a return visit to the person who took your virginity, it was just that special.

And the closer, “Satisfaction,” was not.

Slightly better was the previous number, “Jumpin’ Jack Flash.”

Not quite as good as “Sympathy For The Devil” was “You Can’t Always Get What You Want.”

Yes, they had USC’s choir, yes the French horn played. But what made the song was not the intro or the famous outro, but Jagger’s performance of the lyrics.

Suddenly, he stopped having to prove himself and just sang, and it was more than enough, it was transcendent. This is everything it used to be, an album cut more famous than the hits on AM, something we hear and get transported by.

So there you have it. A few momentary gems amongst a sea of…if not exactly mediocrity, workmanlike performance.

I can see why Jagger wanted to go solo. Keith is trouble. It’d be better to find someone who can play!

But Keith wrote so many of the riffs. And when he occasionally locks on, you swoon!

But it’s occasionally. He’s busy mugging, if only someone else played his part and he performed accents.

And the Stones are loyal, Bobby Keys was there looking not quite as bad as Mick Taylor, and he blew, but you were not blown away.

And yes, Darryl Jones has more fluidity than Bill Wyman, but Bill was basic, just like Charlie, and that was part of the Stones’ magic, like all great recipes, add too much and you kill it.

And Ronnie Wood’s legendary days were with Rod Stewart…who’s making the mistake of flogging a new album. We don’t care. Nobody does. Almost no one can sell an album, cut it for yourself, not your audience, then you’ve got a chance of word of mouth blowing up, we crave authenticity.

And this was the authentic Stones last night. Especially with Mick Taylor.

I know it’s all about money, but Taylor should have been on stage all night, he would have helped.

As for those in the audience…

They don’t go to shows on a regular basis. They’re all about lifestyle, the SUV with the boat and the island vacations, wherein the Stones’ music plays on the stereo.

They’ve all got smartphones, but unlike they’re kids they’re not early adopters, they’ve got one foot stuck in the past.

So they go to see the Stones to remind themselves of who they once were, how they once lived, when you could smoke dope and it wouldn’t be caught on camera, when you had to go to the show to be not only hip but in the loop, when music was the most powerful medium in the world.

It’s not now.

And soon, the dinosaurs who created the paradigm will no longer walk the earth.

So, if you want to catch a glimpse, this could really be the last time.

But if you want to keep your memories intact, you could miss it.

Notes

BON JOVI CAN’T SELL OUT AT HOME

Bon Jovi’s “Because We Can — The Tour” at MetLife Stadium | Goldstar

A. Some venues use Goldstar to pre-sell, not only to get rid of unwanted inventory.

B. Goldstar’s position is that buyers were not going to attend the gig anyway.

C. Has Bon Jovi finally burned it out, by touring too often? Are we seeing the sun set on both classic rock and MTV heroes who’ve gone to the well at high prices too many times?

JAY BLAKESBERG’S RE-CREATION OF THE “SPORTS” COVER 30 YEARS LATER

CANNES: ZACH BRAFF’S KICKSTARTER FILM LANDS FULL FINANCING

Cannes: Zach Braff’s Kickstarter Film Lands Full Financing

The big boys always ruin it for everybody.

Then again, that’s the nature of the Internet. Everyone’s a scammer, bending the rules to add fake followers, trying to create viral action where there is none. Then the paradigm is burned out and people move on to be marks once again.

If you don’t think Braff is a scumbag, then you haven’t seen his bank account.

Yup, that’s what Kickstarter has turned into, A PROMOTIONAL PLATFORM!

IS THE NEW DAFT PUNK SONG REALLY STEELY DAN?

Daft Punk – Random Access Memories 11

AND SOME GEMS FROM THE MAILBAG

From: Berton Averre
Subject: Re: Huey Lewis On Marc Maron

“…And yes, Huey Lewis and the News were not hip…” translation: played really well; wrote good, tight songs with hooks; harmonized; showed up on time for gigs…

The older I get the more I despise the very concept of “hip”. I guarantee, if you make a list of everyone in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame who doesn’t deserve to be there, they’ll all have two things in common: an inability to sing and play in tune and a Hip Quotient going through the roof.
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Subject: Re: Are Foodies Quietly Killing Rock-And-Roll?

I gotta say, the line to get in to see Anthony Bourdain was 3x the size than Springsteen the next day for keynote @ 2012 SXSW.

Alec Pappas

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Subject: Day 2 JazzFest May 3

Mr. Lefsetz,

I thank you for your kind words yesterday. As a reader of your column/blog, I am happy to be mentioned, especially in the manner in which I was addressed yesterday. As a writer of instrumental music, it is hard to be understood at times, but I think you actually nailed it when you said you were transported(my word this time) to another place while listening. That’s what I am up to. Just not in the mud.

Thank you for the entertainment and insight you bring us all.

Best regards,
Jerry Douglas

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From: Jeff Hanna
Subject: Re: Jazz Fest-Day Three

Jerry Douglas rocks !!

In addition to being a close friend, he played on the 2nd and 3rd Circle Albums..He’s the Clapton( or Knopfler) of the Dobro… Astounding…AND tasteful !!

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Subject: Re: Emotion

Hello there Bob,

First of all I want to tell you what a breath of fresh air your letters have been for me since being turned onto them, and you a couple years ago. I sing in the vocal group Take 6. We’ve been in the music biz now for 25+ years. You may, or may not have heard of us, but we are an a capella, Christian Jazz group…never enjoying radio success on any real level, but enjoying the ability to tour for all of this time as many of our contemporaries have come and gone. I’d like to say that one of the biggest reasons has been because we decided long ago to make sure we would strive for excellence with everything we’ve brought to the market place. We realized being authentic to who we are has been a saving grace for us. We could’ve tried to “fit in”…be more radio friendly, pare down the chord structures a bit, but we KNEW that wasn’t us! It wasn’t always easy, or even popular within our band, but, being true has allowed us to still be together and LOVE what we do!

I’m writing all of this because so much of what you write about resonates with me/us in what we have seen, and continue to see in this business of music. There’s so much out there, and the public is actually able, and astute enough to weed through and decide exactly what they want, or…don’t want! When we are teaching young people about what it takes to be in this business, we always encourage them to take risks, to study, to be different, unique, and practice/study!!

Keep up the great, insightful writing. I may not always agree with everything you put out there, but that’s not even the total point. You have a way of getting conversation started, and that…..can move mountains

Thanks

Claude McKnight
founder and lead tenor, Take 6

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From: Michael Laskow
Subject: Re: Emotion

When I was a complete noob in the music business I worked at Criteria Studios in Miami during the mid ’70s. I once stopped Barry Gibb in the hallway and asked him “What makes a song a hit?” His answer was, “Emotion. It’s always about the emotion.”

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Subject: RE: Earthquake

So damn right, Bob! I live in an area of Monrovia that was threatened by the fire a couple of weeks ago. I made myself a bowl of cereal around 11am, opened the window, saw the smoke, took a picture (decided to hashtag #monroviafire), shared it through Hootsuite, then finished my bowl of cereal. By 11:15am, I was already flipping through images of the fire on Twitter and Instagram, befriending others that were experiencing the exact same thing at the exact same time. At about 4pm, ABC News tweeted the “breaking news”. Psshh. Oh, and the news reporter actually tweeted me to see if they could come interview me. Over 5 hours in of watching this fire develop, I was already fatigued, so I passed on the interview for the “breaking news”.

Tommy McCarthy

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Subject: Social Media Manipulation

in my humble opinion the music business is going nowhere until it weens itself off the PR manipulation. the music review is dead because of PR people, and as you say social media is just an echo chamber of what music publicists/record pimps feed to the music blogs and other outlets. folks might participate once in a while, but it’s a post-trust business just like wall street. wall street has the government to keep it going and the music biz does not.

steven walcott
engine studios, brooklyn ny

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Subject: Re: Are Foodies Quietly Killing Rock-And-Roll?

Bob,

I couldn’t agree with you more. Get in the van. Are you gonna f___ing play or are you gonna f___ing play?

-from a Dodge Grand Caravan

Black Francis, The Pixies

(Note: The reason I blanked the swear words is not because I’m a prude, but because if I leave them in this e-mail is gonna be flagged by spam filters and most of you won’t be able to read it! You get the gist…)

Google Set to Launch Streaming-Music Service as Early as This Week-Report

Google Set to Launch Streaming-Music Service as Early as This Week: Report

Apple blew it.

Isn’t it interesting that the Cupertino company is replicating the flaw of the major labels, holding on to a past paradigm, a veritable cash cow, until it is trumped by somebody living in the future.

Streaming is now. The only people who don’t know it are the consumers. Don’t listen to what they do or do not want, they’re clueless. They’re streaming on YouTube today, but are too stupid to see this is how they’re going to get their music tomorrow.

Who’s gonna win?

Spotify, Rdio, MOG/Daisy?

Only one. There’s only one winner on the Internet. One Amazon, one Google… Healthy competition is for brick and mortar, online it’s a scorched earth policy, he with sharp elbows who spends and leads and never sleeps wins. Like Amazon. The financials are not great, but by time they’re done, Amazon is going to own the world, have you heard about their coming 3-D mobile phone?

Amazon is straight out of Clayton Christensen. The first iteration often sucks, but then they end up delivering what’s good enough, at a cheap price. The Kindle Fire is virtually unusable, a bicycle compared to the Ferrari of the iPad, but it’s priced right and people don’t know what they cannot do.

Yup, idiots don’t sit at home frustrated their new cheap tablet won’t do this or that… They’re too stupid to do this or that. They’re not power users… This is how Apple surrendered the lead in smartphones, by making something for the elite power user and abandoning the underlings, who were ultimately satiated by Android, which they can get for no money down. Cheap Android has conquered the world. And it gets better every day. Albeit laden with malware and usability issues.

But, as stated above, most people don’t use these phones for much. iPhones are where the heavy traffic is. But for how much longer?

Yup, Apple is ceding market share.

Oh, don’t be a fanboy and tell me they’ve got all the profits. That’s true. But
Apple became a behemoth via market domination, that’s what the iPod was all about, we own the sphere and you can’t get in. And it worked for a while in phones, but then came Android.

And the ancient iTunes Store is ten years old and profitable, but Apple refuses to kill it with a streaming service, hell, they’re busy trying to imitate Pandora!

It’s not the same Apple…

Apple dominated because of the connector. The thirty pin jobby you see in all hotel rooms. They went to Lightning and suddenly, accessory makers balked, they’re going to Bluetooth.

And maybe this would have happened anyway, but if you think Apple just announces a streaming service and wins, you can’t see that Apple is no longer dominant. There’s that Android problem… Imagine if Apple had streaming music before Android launched! They could have done that, they could have dominated, but NO! They rested on their laurels.

You’ve got to look ahead, you’ve got to kill competition that most people can’t even see.

So Apple announces its streaming service and fanboys buy it and then…

Everybody else ends up where everybody else is, one of the competitors.

Which brings us back to the beginning. Only one wins. You win by being better than everybody else and continuing to dominate. Like Amazon, you start to eat your competition from the bottom, by doing what they do, like streaming movies, for a cheaper price. You strive to be one stop shopping.

How many Facebooks are there? Heard about Justin Timberlake’s MySpace recently?

OF COURSE NOT!

Facebook may not be forever, but it’s winning now.

Does Twitter have a competitor?

So busy selling bonds and giving dividends, Apple is avoiding the future. Where’s the killer instinct, where’s the risk?

The company was built on dominance and it’s losing power every damn day.