Screw the “Voice,” when are we gonna have an American music school?

I’m sick and tired of reading about Max Martin and Adele, products of their countries’ respective music academies, and being subjected to the dash for cash lowest common denominator American dreck made by people who can neither sing nor play, never mind having nothing to say.

Now I’m not talking about music BUSINESS school. Ain’t that America. Where we focus on the money as opposed to the art. Rather, I’m referencing something closer to “Fame.” You remember “Fame,” right? The movie about the New York City arts school featuring a soundtrack by Lesley Gore’s brother that evidenced more honesty and pathos than anything emanating from a TV singing show ever. I’ll give Kelly Clarkson some credit, Carrie Underwood too, but the truth is although they have the pipes, they’re the beneficiaries of the best songwriting in the world, oftentimes done by Swedes.

Yes, they focus on the song in Nashville. Which is why that scene is burgeoning. But if we want to reclaim America’s place atop the musical pyramid we have to focus on education.

You think I’m kidding.

I couldn’t be more honest. Someone has to turn the tide of America, run by corporations that everyone is enthralled by. Read the papers and weep. That’s right, there’s no skiing in California because of global warming, the Alps are falling apart, but we can’t have legislation against the polluters, those raising temps, because then the corporations will be crippled and we won’t have any jobs, because everybody knows corporations create jobs.

No, corporations create profits for their shareholders. These faceless behemoths that last forever don’t care about you and me, they’ve got no soul, and that’s what the best music evidences, soul.

And you don’t have soul if you’re twelve. Stop e-mailing me the ridiculous productions of your pre-teen sons and daughters. So they can sing and play, those are just building blocks, they’ve got nothing to SAY!

You learn how to have something to say by living, by reading, by studying. We need experienced people dropping their musical wares upon us. Not people beholden to the company. That’s right, if the guys, and they are mostly guys, at the label could play, if they could be the stars, they would. Instead, they’re businessmen focused on the bottom line, and the truth is most of the money is going to Europeans, where all the art is generated. Lucian Grainge is English. So are Rob Stringer and Steve Barnett. They at least know a good song, where all Americans are off chasing tech, believing dollars are everything.

But back to this education thing. We have to invest in our future. We need a place where people can learn how to create, can hone their chops.

Berklee’s not doing a bad job of it, but by time you’ve graduated from high school it’s too late, you are who you are. And it’s great that there are jazzers and orchestra students in the music programs of universities, but they’re working within precepts, they’re playing by rote, they think they’re testing boundaries but usually they’re operating in an hermetically sealed, self-congratulatory environment that the rest of us cannot relate to.

To get into the music school you’ve got to have talent. Unlike so many plying the boards today. You’ve got to be able to sing or play or write or all three. We’re gonna weed out the auto-tuners. Does Adele need auto-tune? And if you can play, it makes it much easier to write. I mean the basics, the building blocks, are everything. It’s about having the muscle, the reflexes, to put down what it’s in your head.

Who’s gonna rescue America?

Certainly not Mark Zuckerberg. Definitely not Tim Cook.

I’ll give Jeff Bezos credit for resurrecting the “Washington Post,” but by time he’s done we’ll all be working for minimum wage in the warehouse, listening to the sound of industrial machinery, not music.

The bar is too low. We laud people who can neither sing nor play. The Top Ten is dominated by me-too music. And the truth is we all know it but we cannot challenge it because we’re just listeners, inadequate players.

This is not complicated.

It starts with music in the schools. The public schools. We’ve eviscerated art from the curriculum as we starve the beast and focus on the test, as if everyday life were about tests. Come on, do you need a test to have sex?

But the Republicans have defined the debate, the government is profligate, it wastes money, better to keep it in the hands of the corporate titans, who earned it and create the jobs, as stated above?

HUH?

Private enterprise cannot solve all problems.

It’s the government’s duty to educate the populace. And if you think you can do this via home-schooling, you think art is created in a vacuum, that you can do it all by yourself, and you most certainly cannot.

How about the major labels coughing up some dough?

How about the artists of today investing in tomorrow?

How about a campaign to establish a high school in L.A. Just for the arts. Where everybody making coin on television drops in to tell young charges how to do it.

How about refocusing our bankrupt culture away from money and more on soul-fulfilling enterprises. The old adage is true, money won’t keep you warm at night. But a record will truly save your life.

I don’t want to focus on social media. The young know how to connect so well. We’re not talking about marketing, we’re talking about skills.

But in America only the rich have skills. Only the rich can afford music lessons. But after they take them they jump ship to banking and tech, to the corporation, because they don’t want to struggle and be poor.

Once upon a time the middle class generated musical artists, with middle class values, i.e. questioning authority. But the middle class evaporated with classic rock. And if you think screaming into a mic with a bad voice behind speed metal is classic rock, you’d better pick up a dictionary.

We can wait for it to work it out by itself, via the private sector, but just like manufacturing, just like so many other jobs, the creative industries will be outsourced. Ever notice all the deejays are European? And Max Martin has more hits than any American?

It’s the culture, stupid.

So let’s end the bogus competitions with their lame drama. The Beatles may have broken on television, but music never lived there.

And, when done right, music is much better than television, far superior to movies.

But it needs people to make it. Who’ve been trained to the point where they can let their creativity fly.

Are you with me?

“The Sound Of Sweden – Who rules the pop charts? Swedes.”

“According to a 2004 study, 30 per cent of Swedish children attended publicly funded music programmes – and it was one of these that nurtured Martin’s talent”

BRIT School

“As Snow Fades, California Ski Resorts Are Left High and Very Dry”

“Are the Alps Crumbling?”

What kind of crazy fucked up world do we live in where the agents are hipper than the acts?

Rob Light at the “Billboard” Touring conference:

“Beyonce could learn a thing or two from ‘This American Life”s ‘Serial’ podcast. ‘It’s the single hottest podcast, and it makes geniuses every Thursday when a new podcast comes up – 1 million people are logged on. That’s how we have to distribute music. Why isn’t some artist once a week getting on live, talking about how he wrote a particular song and creating a way every Thursday to see what’s new? The fallacy of the Beyonce stunt, while it was brilliant in its moment, was that most people never listened to all 17 songs or watched all 17 videos. She should have been releasing a new song every Thursday for 17 weeks and engaging us every time.”

What Beyonce Can Learn From Podcasts & More From Rob Light’s Billboard Touring Conference Q&A

That’s right, while you’re sitting at home perfecting your piece of shit album that’s an hour long that’s got more mediocre than delicious in a world where we’ve only got time for great bitching about Spotify payments all the while the public has moved on. As Rob indicates above, despite an idiotic fawning press that treats everything dropped by a superstar who grants access as incredible, the public shrugs, continues to play “Candy Crush” or the saga of the moment, and moves on.

Instead of building that track in the studio, build it online!

Yup, week one is the basics, the drums and the bass. Eventually layer it up to the point where the final week the entire track is complete. Hell, even if it wasn’t a hit we’d be intrigued. Hell, we’d be debating all the time online whether it was until it was finished! Meanwhile, you’d get instant feedback, but more importantly, attention.

But ain’t that the music business. Where the artists’ heads are stuck up their asses believing it’s still all about middlemen when the truth is we live in a direct to fan culture, music is still the canary in the coal mine, it’s not about what you get paid per stream, but whether you’ve got fans or not, whether they’re bonded to you.

In other words, the biggest act in the world is One Direction. And it’s not driven by radio, they’ve barely had any hits, but their career is driven by the Internet and fan interaction.

But Beyonce got a lot of press. We heard about her wannabe divorce. It must have worked.

But the truth is music used to be about risk. It used to be about vulnerability. It used to have warts such that people couldn’t help but embrace those who made it. They were put on a pedestal because they touched the audience’s soul, not because they were rich and famous and dated beautiful people.

But I give Beyonce credit. As I did Radiohead with “In Rainbows.” But those were stunts, one and done. We’re still looking for how to match the music to the audience, getting people to embrace it. And it will only work when it is about the music, not about delivering cookies to your cadre, or delivering tchotchkes via Kickstarter. That’s the penumbra.

Your move.

The sound!

The legendary track on “McCartney” is “Maybe I’m Amazed.”

I was immediately enraptured by “Every Night,” I came to love “Teddy Boy,” but now my favorite is “That Would Be Something.”

How could an album so slight seem like such a masterpiece today?

Starting with “The Lovely Linda” and ending with the almost bizarre instrumental “Kreen-Akrore,” “McCartney” sounds like what it was, an album cut alone, outside the spotlight. It’s like a vision into Paul’s soul.

That would be something
It really would be something

It most certainly would! But you’re hooked on this track long before Paul starts to sing. In an era of beats, of fake, the guitar sound penetrates, and with Paul’s dancing bassline you’re immediately infatuated.

And then there’s the humming. The “mms.” That’s what makes the song magical. It’s always the little things, thrown off, that penetrate us, that we can’t let go of, that we want to be closer to. Oh, to have Paul hum to us, it’s better than a wink, even though he’s one of the most famous winkers of all time.

And then comes the percussion, almost a shuffle, with a cymbal, he’s adding elements, drawing you ever closer, to the point where you can’t detach.

That would be something
To meet you in the falling rain, mama
Meet you in the falling rain

The weird thing is that’s exactly what you feel like. Like you’re strolling down a wet street after dark, head bowed, thinking of the milk you’ve got to buy, and coming in the other direction is none other than Paul McCartney, you lock eyes, he raises his eyebrows and smiles, and then you both move on.

Wow!

And all that happens in two minutes and thirty nine seconds. There’s nothing superfluous, no more is needed, it’s such a contrast to a world where everybody believes an album should be seventy minutes and you’ve got to stretch out on a track to make your point, never mind add enough elements to demonstrate your prowess and impress your audience. But the truth is the mark of expertise is the ability to leave even the best stuff out. It’s always got to be in service to the ultimate production.

Paul seems to be having so much fun, not overthinking it, just getting down what he’s got in his head, further inspired by what he lays down.

And then there’s the coda, an unexpected ending winking at you, waking you up when it’s almost done, kind of like “Her Majesty” on “Abbey Road.”

And despite all the hogwash about compression, the loudness wars, the lame sound of files, even streamed “That Would Be Something” maintains its magic, the same way so much of the greatest music of our lives sounded spectacular emanating from the speaker in the dashboard.

“That Would Be Something” was never a hit.

Nothing on “McCartney” was ever a hit. Sure, “Maybe I’m Amazed” got some FM airplay, but really the album was a brief note from Paul to us, to the listener, to be played alone at home. Reviews were not spectacular, neither were sales. No, don’t get me wrong, it was far from a stiff, it just didn’t have the impact of a Beatles LP.

But all these years later, “McCartney” stands out. As uneven as it may be, as slight as it may be, it’s still better than any album released this year.

And if you get too deep into the details, you’re gonna miss the point. Because it’s truly all about the sound, the magic, the je ne sais quoi.

And nothing embodies this as much as “That Would Be Something.”

If only someone this talented, with this good a voice, could throw something off like this today.

Impossible.

Rhinofy-That Would Be Something

1. We all want something to rally around, something to discuss, a club to belong to, and right now pop is it.

2. Popularity breeds popularity. That which gains traction and sustains, becomes ever bigger.

3. They know it’s about the song. Hooks, choruses, catchiness. If only other musicmakers realized this. Never forget, the Beatles didn’t break these rules, and they could sing too!

4. The younger generation driving pop has never experienced anything different. Sure, they might have heard some classic rock via their parents, maybe, never forget today’s kids were not brought up by baby boomers but Generation-X, but they’re a post-Napster generation to whom fluffiness and selling out are de rigueur. They don’t know about musical credibility, being able to either play or be true to only yourself, because they’ve never experienced it. Meanwhile, all those hewing to their own rules, marching to the beat of their own drummer, consistently break rule #3 above.

5. Radio rules. Bigger than Pandora, bigger than Spotify, bigger than YouTube when it comes to breaking acts. There’s no pull, it’s all push. You don’t get to decide what’s playing, you’re subject to it. Furthermore, the pop stations are run like upbeat clubs wherein possibilities are endless and you’re just a step or heartbeat away from your crush.  Do you really expect me to move to the doldrums of depression where life is not good? That comes later, and if you think college radio rules, you can probably name its top ten, no one else can.

6. Media loves a winner. And mass media likes to trumpet that which appeals to most.

7. A criterion of pop is that you’re physically attractive. And looks, and sexiness, sell.

8. Those not making pop don’t stand for anything other than themselves. They don’t know how to be universal. And today you don’t bubble up from the bottom, but percolate down from the top. Hook them first and expand their horizons later. It’s almost always been thus. From the aforementioned Beatles to John “Cougar” Mellencamp.

9. We live in a money culture, and everybody in the food chain cares about money more than music. That’s right, the label heads who work for the corporation and want their bonuses to the agents filling venues. Everybody’s looking out for themselves. If it ain’t obvious, if it doesn’t appeal to the masses, they’re not interested. In other words, if your label or agent tells you different, chances are you’re entering a backwater ghetto. If you’re fine with that, great, but don’t complain.

10. Music doesn’t drive the culture, hasn’t since the seventies, certainly not since the nineties. It’s prevalent, but if you want to know which way the wind blows, you don’t put on a record.

11. The Internet blew a hole in the scene, making it incomprehensible to most, so they gravitate to where everybody else is. See #2 above.

12. It’s inoffensive. You might think it’s edgy, but the truth is culture has moved, gays can marry, teens sext, what you think is pushing the boundaries is not. Pop is the perfect corporate music, which is why corporations are dying to tie up with it.

13. Income inequality. To question the system you must believe you’ve got access to the system. If you’re an underclass loser desiring a ticket in you’re willing to compromise, to do what’s expedient to make it. You don’t insist on writing your own songs, you’re afraid of being bounced from the system, you don’t want to be exiled. American classic rock was made by the middle class. The middle class doesn’t exist anymore.

Pop is forever, but not this pop. The paradigm will be broken just like the Beatles killed girl groups and hip-hop killed classic rock. Especially since pop is not expanding but growing ever smaller in influence and sound, the same people write and produce all the hits.

But FM ushered in classic rock and MTV ushered in new wave and ultimately hip-hop and we’re just in the middle of this internet period, we still don’t know where we’re going. The internet has caused chaos in the music world, as a result everyone’s gravitated to order, i.e. pop. But this will not be forever. Not long from now we’ll all listen via the same system. Some kind of streaming. Whether it be provided by Apple, Google or Spotify. And that new system will usher in a new paradigm, radio will become secondary. New people will come along to utilize this new system to expand the horizons. However, in the race to please everybody many will bland their sound down to do so. But it’s the outliers who will triumph, those who get no traction today. And their music will be pooh-poohed at first, but what will shine most brightly is the music itself. Image is not so important in the digital age, how you look is no longer everything. And in an era where everybody can play, we respect
talent. We’re going to gravitate to talent.

So, if you want to make it, practice and write stuff that grabs people instantly. If you can’t play and sing, you’re not gonna be a big part of the new world. And EDM is playing, just in case you didn’t know. The better you are and the more you risk the greater your chances. But you’re gonna be the leader, next comes the audience and after that the labels and agents. That’s right, the music business infrastructure likes pop, execs understand it, they can replicate the formula. If you expect them to take a chance…

Don’t.