Kate Hudson Makes Music

The surprising thing is it’s pretty good. Hudson’s got a serviceable voice, and Linda Perry is a virtuoso, but is anybody waiting for this album?

NO! That paradigm ended with the last century. You know, famous person makes an album with hitmakers, a lot of money is spent on publicity and promotion and then the label sees if it sticks to the wall or not. In most cases, it did not. Especially as years wore on. Although Don Johnson did have a hit.

So I’m listening to Howard Stern this morning and I hear Kate Hudson talking and the first thing that went through my mind is “I’m not interested in this.” But I’d already powered through all the news channels on SiriusXM on my way to get my blood drawn, so I decided to hang in there.

America’s sweetheart is an idiot. When she dropped “spiritual,” I about puked. What exactly does that word mean? She gave a pass to her biological father, it wasn’t much different from a pre-internet interview, but the internet blew up nearly thirty years ago.

And actors don’t mean anything anymore. Ryan Gosling couldn’t even open a well-reviewed movie. Because movie stars are two-dimensional, they play roles, whereas when music is done right, especially when the performer has written the song, it channels truth, people see the artist as three-dimensional, the song is coming from their heart.

Now in truth the “musicians” have abdicated this power in the search of dough, but unlike in the old days, people can get their heroes from many verticals, not only the silver screen. So Kate Hudson is famous. But so is Kim Kardashian, and she got booed at the Tom Brady roast, even though Netflix subsequently edited this out of the program.

You see people hate Kim K. Put me in that category. Overexposed. Too much plastic surgery. There’s no there there. Sure, some nitwits are fans, they even buy Skims, but the truth is more people don’t care or shrug at Kardashian than love her.

This is the opposite of the old paradigm, and the news business keeps employing the old paradigm. Running stuff up the flagpole that most people don’t care about whilst telling us it’s ubiquitous, everybody’s paying attention and involved. I can avoid anything these days, and so can you. In an on demand culture we only partake of that which we desire. And who desires to hear Kate Hudson’s new music?

Even worse, to the degree I’ve listened, and once is enough, time is too short, it doesn’t fit in with today’s hit genres. I mean at least try to imitate what’s in the Spotify Top 50. Then again, have you listened to the lauded Sabrina Carpenter’s hit? You’ll be appalled. It’s garbage. Especially if you have the context of the past.

Which is why most people aren’t listening. The Spotify Top 50 is just a slice of the market, a significant slice, but far from the entire pie. I mean did you hear Drake and Kendrick Lamar are in a rap war? Maybe you even know this, with the ubiquitous press. But who cares? I can’t seem to find anybody other than superfans of hip-hop, the rest of us are laughing, not only do we not care, we think it’s childish, so last century. Dissing each other in music? You can’t be more creative than that?

But that’s the world we live in. Where everybody can see Biden is old but those on the left can’t admit it. They’re doctrinaire. Believing if they keep everybody in line and no one talks about it no one will notice. I mean COME ON!

The truth is that being 44 is not a hindrance to Kate Hudson. But her lack of recent fame is. It’s not like she’s coming off of a hit movie. And TV shows move the culture more than movies anyway, more people see them.

Hudson’s star has been fading ever since “Almost Famous.” Who is hungry to hear her sing? Other than the people involved in this project, I can’t think of a single person.

And it requires an effort to listen. You’ve got to pull the music, the old days of push are history. Even her contemporaries, are they going to make the effort, with so many other options?

And speaking of options, like Sly Stone sang, today everybody is a star. And a lot of them are educated and articulate. Sure, we’ve got some imbecilic influencers, but no one said Sam Bankman-Fried was stupid. Nor Elon Musk. You might despise them for other reasons, but they’re educated, they’re smart. You might want to hear what they have to say. But Kate Hudson, a movie star? You’d have to be brain dead.

I’m aware there’s a great unwashed underclass who go for this lowbrow fodder, but in truth the winners in today’s world, and the public knows it, the younger audience even knows it, are the intelligent and educated.

Talk to a college student. They know how the game is played. They know how hard it is to make a living. They want to follow in the footsteps of those who are making bank. To a great degree, entertainment is left to the lower classes, who come from nowhere and even if they make it against long odds are willing to go back to nowhere. Never mind not being smart and worldly enough to make a stand against the system, which tells them what to do. Like the major labels who won’t even release your record if they don’t hear it as a hit, they’ll make you work with co-writers, do cover songs, and even if you can get away with resisting, chances are they won’t promote it, it’s too hard a slog, an uphill push. There’s not going to be some deejay in the middle of nowhere who’s going to spin it ad infinitum and turn it into a worldwide hit. The days of that kind of free-thinking conflagration are history. After all, just a few companies own all the radio stations and terrestrial radio means less than ever before.

So who is Kate Hudson’s album made for?

Maybe there’s a chance a track can catch on, never say never, but publicity, promotion, is no longer enough. I mean if Sam or Elon, even Bill Gates made a record, I’d check it out. But Kate Hudson?

Why is everybody operating in the past? Entertainment is fluid, and archaic systems keep being employed until they ultimately collapse. No studio is as powerful as Netflix. And it’s Netflix that had an extended comedy festival, taking programming risks all the while. Nobody else is doing this.

Needless to say record labels are not. They sit back and wait for something to resonate online and then they try to push it forward, they don’t make an artistic judgment, they don’t sign something that’s artistically good without the social numbers, all the rest of the indicators, that’s not the business they’re in.

And “The New Yorker” jacked its subscription price and is staying alive, people want it But “Entertainment Weekly” ceased publication. And the tabloids… “The National Enquirer” might be a feature of the Trump trial, but they can’t sell it. Gossip is online now. For free.

In truth, nobody from the old century wants to do the hard work. Find an act worth listening to, nurturing it and then building it from scratch. They used to say they wouldn’t put out your music unless they heard a single, now you literally have to create a hit single before they’ll even sign you!

And shortcuts, like making a record with a famous actor, no longer work.

It’s kind of like the Gaza protests. The Democrats are scared sh*tless about losing young people, yet every poll says Gaza is way down the list in terms of their voting priorities.

Never mind tuning in Fox News on the way to my appointment this morning and thinking I’m in an alternative universe. Trump is winning at trial, Stormy Daniels is a money-hungry deplorable. I mean if we can’t even get the straight news straight, what are the odds we can get entertainment news straight? Close to nil. Which is why the consumer base doesn’t even pay attention, they just go online and wait to hear what their friends say is worth their while.

Kate Hudson can make music all day long. Do I have to pay attention to her and her hype? I mean who gives a crap what Hudson has to say. As for reasonable singers, they’re a dime a dozen on TV, and they don’t break through. We’re looking for artistry, not product. There’s nothing to see here. Move on.

If you were even paying attention to begin with.

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