I picked up the "L.A. Weekly" and found out the dinosaurs are back on the road.  And that now includes acts that had their heyday in the eighties, like Pat Benatar, not only REO Speedwagon and Donna Summer and…Al Green.

None of these acts can sell a new record.  Not in quantity.  But they want to work, and people go to see them, however frequently in decreasing numbers.

And what do we hear?  No one wants to hear the new music.

First and foremost because they’re unfamiliar with it.  But what if they knew the new tunes?  Wouldn’t they care then?

Of course.  Assuming they were good.

Yup, it’s time to take the dregs out of the gutter.  It’s time to give these old acts a chance.  It’s time to see if the audience is dead or alive.

Because without new material, you’re certainly dead.  No matter how big your hit was, don’t you get sick of performing it every night, don’t you want to stretch out?

Give Bob Dylan credit.  He doesn’t give the audience what it wants.  Not only does he record new music, but he rearranges his past hits.  So when you go, it’s not nostalgia.  Hell, it’s more about seeing who he’s working with, picking up on the groove.

Then again, Dylan was always creative.  Not doing what people told him to do.  The rest of the old acts?

The Doobies put out an album of new material ten years ago with some good tracks.  Heard ’em?  Of course not.  Only true diehards are aware.

Heart put out a reasonably high quality album that went straight to the dumper too.

Cyndi Lauper’s on the road.  Can you name a Lauper track that’s not two decades old?

So what are all the old acts to do?

BAND TOGETHER!

Yes, it’s the opposite of their heyday.  It’s the era of the NOW compilation.  Which is why there should be a ten track compilation of the best new music by the best old bands.  Just one track apiece.  Hyped to high heaven.

NO COVERS!  That’s cheating, that’s playing it safe.  You’ve got to write one new hit tune.  Carole King, this is your chance, you’ve got the chops.  And I’d salivate over one great new JT song.  But all we’ve got is a vapid wasteland, as these aged performers feed the lifestyles of their handlers on the road.  I once had a famous manager tell me he’d be happy if the biggest band of the seventies DIDN’T make a new record.  He just wanted them to tour, tour, tour.  Which they did.  To the point where they burned it out.

So, we make one person king, the arbiter, who gets to pick the tracks.  Make it Don Was, make it David Anderle, even John Kalodner. Someone with cred from back then.  Who gets paid.  This is not a charity project.

And what do you do with the resulting record?

Mmm…

You could sell it at Wal-Mart.  Real cheap.  That paradigm’s about dead, but with this many blue chips at a cheap price…

Or it could be put out by Live Nation.  You get a copy free with every pair of tickets you buy.

Or just maybe, you get a relatively benign corporation to fund it.  Let’s say Google.  Or maybe even Apple.  Get a different act in an iPod commercial for a week.  Yup, for the next campaign, ten different acts over ten weeks.  Maybe you even give away the songs on iTunes.

Don’t get hung up on the short money.  The key is the LONG MONEY!  In terms of ticket sales and careers.

And you know there’s got to be a PBS special, tied into the fund drive.

There’s got to be MASSIVE marketing.  A song for ESPN.  Performances on the "Today Show".  Endless TV placements.  Unless the word gets out so every baby boomer is aware, the project fails.

But it won’t fail.  Because really, people want new music.  Assuming it’s good, and digestible.  And everybody else is on the same page, listening to the same damn album, so they can talk about it.

And the following summer, another album, with another ten acts.

Or maybe two a year.

Maybe one a year is new material and the other is covers.

This is a blue chip idea.  Guaranteed to pay dividends.  Short term dividends?  Maybe not.  So can you get Live Nation to get on board?  Interesting.  As for labels…most of these old acts don’t have deals anymore.  Which actually gives you freedom.

How about a little creativity, how about a little chance, how about trumpeting the music instead of the grosses.

Great ideas are a dime a dozen.  But execution is another thing.  You need a team on this full time.

Are we going to say music is dead, that you’ve got to be under thirty to record and the end result must be made for a market and suck or are we going to give everybody with 10,000 hours a chance to prove themselves.  All these acts kill live.  That’s why they can still tour.  Let’s incentivize them to create great new music.  And believe me, the exposure is a great incentive.  You’re gonna record and someone’s gonna HEAR IT!