Well, there’s a bunch of service charges.  Can’t beat the Ticketmaster fees, the promoter’s got to get some of its money back. You know Gene ain’t parting with any of his!

I’ll give the man credit.  Gene was 2010 back in the nineties.  With the coffin, the convention, he was all about superserving the niche.  And that’s what the KISS Army is, a niche.

One deserved hit single and a lame ballad by a band member you kicked out will only keep the hoi polloi interested for so long.  Or look at it this way, Gene Simmons is all over TV and still NO ONE wants his album.

To be exact, 187,557.  That’s how many copies "Sonic Boom" has sold.  And it’s only that high because Wal-Mart bought so many and they’re still featured in the store.  But, to speak Mr. Simmons’ language, that’s BUPKES!  Isn’t this the guy who said he was going to teach Wal-Mart a lesson or two?  Seems they’re not listening.  The retailer’s low-price strategy, selling books for far under ten bucks, has got nothing to do with Gene’s high-priced strategy, like selling a bass for $5,000 with a meet and greet.

But those tickets are not too high-priced…

This was the e-mail:

KISS with special guest Buckcherry

Sunday, November 22 at 7:30 pm
Oracle Arena, Oakland

Free KISS concert ticket offer:
Begins: Now!  
Ends: Thursday, November 19 at 10:00 pm

Offer made subject to limited availability on a first-come, first-served basis.  Additional $5.40 order processing, $2.50 print at home, and $0.75 service charge will apply.  Limit: 8 tickets per customer.

To redeem free concert ticket offer, click here: http://www.ticketmaster.com/event/1C0043328BD65177?did=pf

Gene Simmons shouldn’t be trying to convince us, those who love to ridicule him, but should be playing solely to those who truly care.

KISS should be playing house concerts.  For an extra fee, Mr. Tongue will schtup your wife.

KISS should be involved with Topspin, not Wal-Mart.  The band should be offering a whole menu of choices.  Not only vinyl and a photo book, but a copy of Gene’s Polaroids.

There’s still money to be made, but KISS must go smaller, not bigger.

Because bigger ain’t working for them.  In fact, it’s kind of laughable.

(I know, I know Gene.  I just did you a solid!  I gave the URL to your axe, wrote about your gig, where people might go for free, yet still buy merch…I gave you the publicity you so dearly desire.  Take all the money you can get.  But just know that your band is a sideshow.)