My inbox is filling up with people asking this question. Oasis is selling out stadiums, how come I didn’t mention them?

Well, my list was not meant to be comprehensive, after all I didn’t mention Metallica, but really I didn’t mention Oasis because it’s a one-off. Or is it? Are we going to see endless Oasis shows just like with Guns N’ Roses? There’s not a soul alive who believes the Gallagher brothers aren’t doing it for the money. As for their continued harmony… If the Robinson brothers can make peace for this long, maybe the Gallagher brothers can too.

Actually, the last time I saw Oasis was when they opened for the Black Crowes at the Greek and played very loud to an indifferent crowd.

You see Britpop never really made it over here, it wasn’t really a thing. Good luck finding someone who can name a Blur song, they played Coachella recently to a tiny crowd despite being paid beaucoup bucks.

Now I can completely understand why Oasis sold out stadiums in the U.K. It’s not only the music, but the cultural element. Northern lower middle class boys giving the finger to London and those who think they’re better. There were hits, a whole movement. But in America?

They had one big hit on MTV, “Wonderwall.” And that single only climbed to #8 on the chart, its follow-up, the delicious “Champagne Supernova,” didn’t chart at all. Then again, which chart, and charts don’t tell the full story anyway.

The truth is Oasis got a good amount of MTV airplay in the mid-nineties with songs from their second LP, “(What’s the Story) Morning Glory?” As a result that album sold 5,500,000 copies in the US, which is very impressive, but this was in an era where they had to invent the diamond award for albums that sold over 10 million!

But it’s nothing to sneer at.

As for the follow-up, 1997’s “Be Here Now,” that album sold 1,013,000 albums in the U.S. A sh*t ton by today’s standards, but not much more than respectable back then.

And then it was over. The next LP, 2000’s “Standing on the Shoulder of Giants” sold 208,000 copies in the U.S. 2002’s “Heathen Chemistry” sold 154,000. 2005’s “Don’t Believe the Truth” sold 202,000. 2008’s “Dig Out Your Soul” sold 116,000. SO WHO IS BUYING ALL THE TICKETS???

Noel Gallagher is the number one quote in the music business. He’ll slag anybody and it’ll be funny. It keeps him in the news, because everybody else is afraid of their shadow and his High Flying Birds mean almost nothing over here. I’ve seen them. I don’t need to see them again. I can’t imagine anybody needing to see them again.

As for Liam… I’ve seen him too, in his anorak with his nasal voice and his sneer and it felt completely out of place, out of time, you almost wanted to tell the guy to grow up. As for the audience…he was opening and to say he got polite applause is being polite.

SO WHY IS OASIS SELLING OUT STADIUMS IN AMERICA?

Because by all metrics they should not.

I will say that the brouhaha, the sheer mania about the reunion crossed over from the U.K. to the U.S. People in America got excited and felt left out. Something was happening there, they wanted a piece of that.

A piece of exactly what? Four guys standing on stage singing songs you don’t know? It’s one thing to go to a gig in a smaller venue when you’re only familiar with one or two songs, but to pay for a stadium play?

And Oasis’s hits were THIRTY YEARS AGO! Meaning if you were alive and kicking back then and this music meant anything to you, you’re 50+, and the older generations abhor a crowd, they want to pay extra to be pampered or not go at all. So to go to the stadium to see Oasis?

I saw Oasis in a club. The Whisky. The brothers have gone on record that the show wasn’t good, but I will tell you, I’ve seen new bands, ones I was completely unfamiliar with, and was wowed. Let me see, I saw Elvis Costello, Joe Jackson, Tom Petty…the list goes on of people I saw at the Whisky, a veritable postage stamp of a club. Those were pinch me experiences. Oasis? The latest new thing from Britain that was going to be big over here. But they weren’t, not right away.

Now some acts put on a show, the record is the blueprint at most, you’ve got to see them. Well, I’ve seen these guys and you don’t get much more than the music. So?

It’s the Emperor’s New Clothes. There is something there, but not that much. Do I expect rabidity in the stadiums? No, because most people don’t know the songs. So why are they going? FOMO!

First and foremost you’re afraid you can’t get a ticket. So if you think you want to go, you’d better pony up right away. So you’re sitting in front of your computer for the on sale…

I won’t say it’s like Beanie Babies, but it’s close, a fad. This is not the Beatles reuniting, this it not much of anything at all. But it’s doing BOFFO AT THE B.O!

Oh, don’t get your knickers in a twist. If you go and love it, more power to you. I love “Champagne Supernova” and played it plenty, but I feel no urgency re this gig. I mean if someone calls me…but otherwise I’m just fine sitting this one out.

And then there are those going to multiple shows! This is not the Grateful Dead or Phish, not even the Dave Matthews Band. This isn’t about a different set every night, extended jams, this is essentially the same songs every evening.

And you know the reviews will be positive. Because the American writers don’t want to be left out, the British press raved. As for the attendees, it’s very hard to find someone who paid for a show, maybe the last appearance in your town ever, and say meh…

So what have we learned here?

Oasis is a good band. And they’ve got attitude. But they never sold a ton of tickets over here and as solo artists they’re close to meaningless. Proving that you’ve got to go out under the moniker of the band, to some degree it doesn’t even matter if the originals are in the act. One plus one equals three.

Then there’s a yearning for how it used to be. Although a boomer believes the nineties were lightweight, the ‘Times” just did a whole story about Gen Z’s nineties nostalgia. So this is a way to get in on it, a peek at what once was. The fact that the heyday is so far in the past works for Oasis…I mean who is around who actually saw the band?

So what other bands can do this?

Well, the formula is clear. You’ve got to have been gone a long time, certainly in excess of a decade, although the longer the better. The reunion must appear to be impossible… Hell, how much ink has been dripped about the tour not even finishing? All those stories saying the band doesn’t get paid until it’s over? It’s almost like a wreck on the freeway, you want to slow down and see it!

And then you’ve got to have a media frenzy. Taylor Swift’s previous tour didn’t go clean everywhere. But once you couldn’t get a ticket for Eras you felt completely left out, you were dying to get in.

This Oasis tour is more akin to Charlie Sheen’s. Remember when he was blowing up, shooting himself in the foot? They booked a tour with no essential content, Sheen had not done live gigs like this before, but tickets sold. And now? Charlie Sheen can’t get arrested.

There are so many people who played “Appetite for Destruction” to death, music that was even more real and angry than that of Oasis. And there were three albums, the first and the two “Illusion”s. And Axl Rose is certifiably nuts. So it’s like hell froze over when they got back together, especially after so much time. But why are people continuing to go?

I guess it’s kind of like Styx and Def Leppard and the rest of the bands out every summer, these acts represent a time in your life, and there were hits. But Styx arguably had more success than Oasis in America and they don’t sell out stadiums. Then again, as I just said, they’re out every year.

Is there demand for Journey with Steve Perry? I thought at some point it would be too late, but now I’m wondering… People would be so afraid this would be the last time that they’d go, never mind Led Zeppelin.

And scarcity… Felice’s car got totaled in the fall of 2022 and Hyundai wanted to sell her an electronic Ioniq 5 for ten grand over sticker, 60k. Needless to say she said no. But now you can lease the same car for a little over a hundred bucks a month.

Not everything is forever.

So is Oasis selling out stadiums this summer? Absolutely. But don’t compare the band with the other acts who sell out venues this large year after year. This is more of a freak show than music.

And if you’re pissed off by everything I’ve said I hope you never cross Noel Gallagher. I mean, HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR ABOUT YOURSELF!