Trump vs. Hillary

This is how rap killed rock.

The GOP establishment might be MOR, out of date, hymns for oldsters who refuse to acknowledge times change, but Hillary and her band of Dems are like the rock that got a forty year run and was then stunned when hip-hop eviscerated it.

Don’t point to the Desert Trip to validate rock’s relevance. That’s just oldsters with too much money claiming they’re important, when they’re absolutely not, except for their cash, which they dispense freely, like the Kochs, like George Soros, like everybody who’s lived too long and believes they’re entitled to rule the world.

But they’re not. It’s what you don’t know that’ll kill you. And that is the times keep a-changin’ and he not busy being born is dying and if you haven’t seen the Hillary movie there’s no media in your neighborhood.

There were a ton of good rock bands. But MTV stopped airing them because hip-hop got better ratings. And because rock became calcified, a cartoon, a caricature of itself. It went from honest to phony, jeans to spandex, and every band which built its rep on danger recorded a power ballad, figuring the suits would like it. If you can’t get on television doing what got you traction, give them what they want.

But the hip-hoppers did not.

Don’t think of Drake, think of Biggie and Tupac, both killed in the rap wars. We keep hearing the Donald and his minions are gonna wreak havoc not realizing we’ve already seen this movie, and we survived it.

And if you don’t like the popular culture analogy you don’t realize that’s what the election has become, issues, schmissues, titillate me, make me laugh, play to the cameras, do the unexpected. Hell, the whole Trump campaign has resembled nothing so much as the launch of a musical act, with all the publicity stunts and media manipulation. And the reason he’s got more mindshare than any musician is because he’s accepting the game has changed, he’s playing by new rules, he’s creating every day, not worrying if every track’s a hit, knowing that if you lose your hold on the public consciousness, you’re toast.

Where has Hillary BEEN for the past two weeks? Like an old rocker in the seventies she’s taking three years to make her next LP believing when it drops she’ll have three hit singles and can go on tour, er, be in the White House, for four years straight. But today, the work of the classic rockers goes straight to the dumper. Despite the run-up, the albums last a weekend, maybe a week at most, and then they’re forgotten. We’ve been hearing for years about Hillary’s coronation, it’s her time, she deserves it, she has experience. But that’s exactly what most people don’t want. The same old people providing the same old music, er, politics.

Now I’m not saying Hillary should rap, but it worked pretty good for Aerosmith, when the band hooked up with Run-DMC. Read the oral history, neither act was keen to do it, it was the behind the scenes people who made it happen.

“The Inside Story Of When Run-DMC Met Aerosmith And Changed Music Forever”

And the behind the scenes people have to bring Hillary into 2016. Wherein telling people what they want to hear works only if you sometimes tell them what they don’t, which enhances your credibility. Hillary has the credibility of a five year old, who’ll say anything, deny anything, to not get punished and get ice cream. But ice cream melts and you’re left with nothing, and we don’t want a five year old running the country, but we do want someone who is looking forward as opposed to back.

And of course so many of the Donald’s policies are retro, like a rapper sampling, giving his audience a frame of reference. But if you don’t find his antics entertaining, you’ve got no sense of humor. Hell, I burst out laughing when he called Elizabeth Warren “Pocahontas.” Oh, don’t get your politically correct knickers in a twist, funny is funny, like those jokes you tell in the dorm when no one is listening.

It’s Hillary’s election to lose. And she’s doing a good job of it. Because instead of making new music, that people want to hear, it’s the same damn thing over and over and over again. Check the charts, how many of the acts from the nineties are dominating today? How much of the sound of the nineties is dominating today?


Bernie’s triumphing because he’s all new, the music industry could learn a lesson, it’s the message more than the punim, embrace ageism at your peril.

And Trump’s triumphing because he’ll say the unsayable, throw bombs, do all the stuff your parents hate before they tell you to turn it down.

That’s what the Hillary supporters keep telling Trump, to turn it down. That his music doesn’t sound like the music that came before, he didn’t pay his dues, he didn’t go to music school, he didn’t go on the road, he hasn’t EARNED his success.

Like every new act that’s toppled what’s come before.

Hillary, you can’t win doing what you’ve done before. The game changed. And you seem not to have gotten the memo.

Stop worrying about making mistakes.

Start telling your truth.

Don’t fall for gotcha moments. Yup, coal mining has got to go, Trump would have doubled down, you caved, have the courage of your convictions.

Make news every day.

Don’t worry about being warm and fuzzy, what message are you sending to the young women of America, that to get ahead you’ve got to shave off your rough edges, that you can’t be strong, you have to smile and appeal to men?


You’ve just got to make a hit record.

And a hit is always the same, it’s new and different.

We crave the new and different.

And right now Bernie and Trump own the charts and you may be touring to aged acolytes, but it’s one person one vote in America and despite their connections and cash, they can’t help you win. Hell, Bernie out-fundraised you getting cash from individuals, like a modern act which understands everybody streaming is better than a few buying CDs.

Pissed you off there, didn’t I.

If you’re lamenting the passage of CDs, the death of downloads, the low per-stream payments… If you think YouTube is the enemy, you don’t realize Robert Kyncl has more power than everybody in the RIAA combined. The people voted for YouTube, and if you were smart you’d realize it’s being eclipsed by Spotify, et al, but you hate them even more.

You’re just like Hillary, no wonder you like her so much.

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