More Oslo
I forgot to tell you I went to the Viking Ship Museum!
I’m back in Santa Monica and I feel like I’m still moving at 600 miles an hour. You know, that feeling where your body’s all tingly and you’re afraid you’re gonna lose your balance?
I started early this morning in Oslo. Our takeoff was delayed by an hour because there was a bag on board sans passenger, and that’s a security no-no. Took them all that time to locate it in the hull and remove it and when we landed in London the assembled multitude jumped out of their seats and surged towards the front. I’m used to Europe being so civilized! But not in this instance. Getting up before the plane reaches the gate is a taboo in the U.S., but I’m still learning about national cultures. Most fascinating was the description of Finland. To a man (and woman!) everyone in Oslo testified about the weirdness of the Finns. How they were different from the rest of the Scandinavians, that they were more like Russians, their ancestors came from the east as opposed to the west. It wasn’t a put-down, everyone marveled at Finland’s art and architecture, and it was remarked that the number one gig in that country was being a school teacher, it’s just when it came to the music business there everyone threw their arms up in the air, they couldn’t understand it! I’m all about seeing the sights, but this trip convinced me how important it is to interact with the people, to get their viewpoints.
And the rush on the plane wasn’t the only cultural difference.
I went to take a pee and there was a giant photo of a woman in chains, that’s right, her ankles were locked up, it filled the space above the urinals. You couldn’t get away with this in the U.S., we take our treatment of women very seriously. And speaking of women, as I was relieving myself I heard a high-pitched voice on the phone. It truly flummoxed me. It was definitely a woman, but it sounded like she was right there in the men’s room with me…
SHE WAS!
Although the urinals were around the corner, not behind a door, just a left turn at the end of the lavatory, sinks were shared. And I didn’t remember this the second time I took a pee, for I was rounding the corner, zipping up, and…
Yesterday I was interviewed by Knut Schreiner at an IFPI event. That’s their RIAA, but it’s not only limited to Norway… Knut is the guitarist for Turbonegro. They play festivals every summer, but the audience just wants to hear the old tunes. So Knut went back to school to get a degree in sociology, and his questions were the most intelligent I’ve ever encountered, each densely packed with twists and turns and I could have just sat there and listened to him. And Knut is a fan, they’re all fans. We discussed our favorite shows, he told me he was going to see Crosby, Stills & Nash. Funny how the further you are from the source the more you are fascinated by it.
And then I got into a deep discussion with the assembled multitude about Spotify.
They told me the ratio was 80/20. That’s right, 80% paid to 20% freemium!
Now it all started back in 2009, before YouTube gained traction. And Norway is a rich economy, where they told me people like to pay. But the execs were gangbusters about freemium, because they saw it worked, people converted.
And Spotify killed piracy dead, IFPI’s research said only 1% of the music audience now acquired their music primarily via piracy.
Furthermore, Petter told me Universal paid out its largest royalties in history last year. But still, the musicians are bitching, just like they are over here. You see players can’t adjust to the new game, where it’s all about what’s listened to. Used to be the sale was the transaction. Now, it’s the listen. Furthermore, people are listening to Led Zeppelin and the hits of yore, which didn’t used to generate much of an income at all. Not that catalogue dominates streams, it’s mostly pop. But is that Spotify’s fault? The label’s fault? What we seem to forget is we never go back to the past. To agitate for the old paradigm is fruitless. You must embrace the new. And in Norway the royalties keep going up, bottom is in the rearview mirror.
Not that Norway is exactly like America. They’re so technologically advanced! They transfer money to each other via their mobiles. The CFO of Universal told me he didn’t carry cash, he opened his wallet to show me, not a kroner there. Wait, there was a 20 Euro note, which surprised him. He pays with his card or his phone. Terje Hakonsen showed me his credit card with built-in wireless, you just wave it and the charge happens. And all bills are paid via wireless terminals, you slide in your card and enter your PIN. Do you know your credit card’s PIN? I couldn’t buy something at a drugstore in Toronto because even though my card does have a chip, I’ve got no PIN! United States, greatest country in the world, never forget that.
Not that Norway was always ahead. The Warner MD told me he first encountered McDonald’s when he visited a friend living in Indiana. He was used to one TV station and one hour of pop music radio a week, and this was the eighties! Now there we’ve got the rest of the world beat. Illustrating no country is the best.
And I kept hearing about the German CD market, how it was failing, and streaming had little traction. I couldn’t understand this! Germany, isn’t it Europe’s paragon of commercial excellence? But I was told Germany is a late adopter when it comes to technology. And that Germany loves Norwegian music, that its only native sounds are metal and EDM.
And I believe what they said about Germany because it was in the Franzen book!
I finished it on the plane today. There was that writer who claimed “The Goldfinch” was “Harry Potter” for adults. “Purity” is not. “Purity” is America at its best. An artist not concerned about monetary reward who is writing his own truth. The book is laden with aphorisms. There’s one dollop of wisdom after another. About relationships, the internet and life itself. But I doubt “Purity” will have a deep impact upon the culture, because it’s dense and difficult to read for anybody whose vocabulary is challenged. If only we had a record as good as “Purity,” people would turn off their televisions and video game consoles and we’d all be sound crazy. This is the way it used to be, when records were about testing limits. Franzen ain’t great with arc, he’s not perfect with plot, but I haven’t read a better analysis of today’s world, an evocation of today’s reality, from internet porn to fame to money to… Read it.
So back to the Viking Ship Museum. We went there after seeing Kon-Tiki and the Fram. The Viking ships are huge! And they’re a thousand years old! They rowed to Egypt. You can’t fathom it, you can’t put it in a box, you wonder if it’s all a hoax. But there the ships are…
When I left Oslo it was raining.
And in L.A. it’s now in the eighties.
And my body is somewhere in between.
And it feels good to be home.
But as soon as I put my foot down on terra firma…
I wanted to be back in Oslo.
Ah, the conundrum of life.
