The most frightening episode of our trip to Whistler occurred at the top of the Harmony Express, way above treeline, at Whistler’s peak.

You couldn’t see a fucking thing.

It’s what’s commonly known as a whiteout.  Where the sky blends with the snow.  And there’s no vegetation, no trees to provide a point of reference.  Imagine walking down the stairs in the dark, but each step is at a different angle and is a different width and drops a different amount.  Sound scary?  IT FUCKING IS!

But you can’t freak out.  Because then you can’t get down.

So you go a handful of feet, your skis come up to your chest, and short of breath, the anxiety kicking in high, you stop.

And you don’t want to move again, but you must.  To the point where you eventually make it to treeline.  And breathe a sigh of relief, feeling you’ve dodged a bullet.

Whistler’s a funny place.  It’s got the greatest vertical drop in North America.  But the altitude is LOWER than ANYWHERE in the Rockies.  2,100 feet rather than the 8,000 typical of Colorado.  Not that they tell you that, they speak in METERS in Canada.  They switched because we said we were going to.  Ain’t that America, not the company that built John Mellencamp’s truck, but the benevolent giant that promises one thing and does another.  If America were a boyfriend, Oprah would host all the jilted suitors, there’d be a support group for those screwed by the entity that only cares about itself.

And with a temperature of 2, or 4, CELSIUS, the precipitation that descends from the sky isn’t quite snow at the base of Whistler.  Because when the temperature is hovering around forty degrees Fahrenheit, you get RAIN!

And rain it did at Whistler.  And blow.  And snow, as you ascended the lifts.  It was the most challenging skiing I’ve done since I lived in Vermont.  The fog alone.  We were skiing at the top of Blackcomb yesterday, photographers were shooting families and couples at the top of Seventh Heaven, we had a run down the mountain so glorious you’d tell your GRANDCHILDREN about it, and then, just as we were heading for the glacier, the fog blew in.

We’re a good 1,500 or 1,800 vertical feet above treeline.  It’s akin to the top of Whistler, in the whiteout atop Harmony, but this time THERE’S NO EASY WAY DOWN!  And you hear that horrible sound seemingly inches away.  SNOWBOARDERS!!!  Barreling down the slope, unable to see.  It’s like driving in Times Square at midnight with no headlights.

And I want to let Felice know how scared I am, but if I do, will she be able to make it down??

Eventually, we made it to treeline again.  Where we had some quite fine skiing.  Shit, I may never go above the trees again.  At least not in CANADA!

Dan told us it hadn’t been like this.  That it had been sunny, with no rain, only snow.  That he’d had eight feet of the white stuff on his porch.  But when we were there it was more like a March day in Connecticut.  Gray and miserable.

But the mark of an expert skier is someone who can ski in ANYTHING!  I told Felice she passed the test.

And we were so lucky to BE THERE!

You see Dan Fraser, whom I don’t even KNOW, who’s the touring guy at Nettwerk, offered up his condo.  That’s one righteous dude.  And seeing as how we were going to Vancouver for my speech at MusicBC, it was a perfect fit.

So last night we took a cab back from the mountains, into the city.  And Vancouver’s so fascinating.  It’s like a living "Blade Runner".  With high rises and rain.  Yet we didn’t eat sushi, but Italian, at this restaurant, with Bob, Chris and Savry.

Chris…  He regaled us with his travels to exotic places.  God, nobody in the U.S. goes to Peru, never mind Bolivia.  And to Everest base camp?  Travel is fascinating, it illustrates how your own world is so…limited.

And Bob runs MusicBC.  And he’s telling me he’s got a sponsorship from Apple.  That they gave him a computer.  But he couldn’t advertise the fact, couldn’t use their logo.  I mean the iPod dominates, yet is STILL COOL!  Fascinating, if you think about it.  Brand management, imaging.  God, could the entertainment industry do it any WORSE?  People won’t go to see shitty movies, but they’ll continue to buy iPods even though their previous TWO failed.  Because they’re hooked on the mystique, because nothing else is in the LEAGUE!

And this morning I read a fascinating story in the "National Post" about a bread chain.  How the supermarkets have it written into their leases that the bread boutiques can’t be in the same mall.  Seems that small companies that do something right can kill the mass marketers.  In other words, Wal-Mart is no match for Starbucks.  People will pay more for quality.  And this article attributed the spark to the TV food channels, they’ve raised the public’s perception, their desires re food.  If only MTV did this!  Imagine if MTV respected its audience, educated it, turned it on to new GREAT things.  Hell, that’s why it’s gonna die.  Because the niches are gonna kill it. 

A leavening strategy

And this afternoon I did the gig.  It was supposed to be taped, but the tech couldn’t get it right (no, he was not a member of the Climax Blues Band).  Unfortunately, I was hot, and my heat has been lost forever.

Funny, I feel like an act.  It’s so different LIVE!  Feeling out what the people want to hear, getting the energy from the crowd.  Recorded music might be in flux, but the GIG is gonna last FOREVER!

And when we got back to the hotel, we took a walk, down to the waterfront (great Simple Minds song).  And after eating some Tim Hortons donuts, we walked through this hallway where they had the history of Vancouver depicted in photographs.  The WHOLE TOWN burned down in 45 minutes in the 1880s.  And in SIX MONTHS there were already 23 new hotels.  But, the city really earned its place on the map when the transcontinental railroad was completed, and goods shipped from Asia ended up in New York in a week, and Britain a week THEREAFTER!

And do you know that in 1930, the TALLEST BUILDING IN THE BRITISH EMPIRE opened in Vancouver?  But it was a failure, and in a few years the Guinness family of Ireland purchased it for $900,000, one third of its construction price.

So, after walking through the drizzle back to our temporary abode high in the sky, Felice took a shower and I figured I’d fill you in.  Before Bruce picks us up for dinner.