My Lover Man
I’m Bruce’d out. It’s not the man, it’s his fans. He’s no longer a living artist, but an encapsulation of their youth. Just like U2 is for late Gen X’ers, Springsteen is for baby boomers.
It’s funny if you think about it. Bruce Springsteen is the kind of guy these fans wouldn’t have spoken to in high school. The weirdo loner in the not smart classes. Make no mistake, Bono and Mick Jagger were ALWAYS cool, always had friends, but the only thing Bruce had was his music. Take his well-publicized feud with his father as evidence. That’s what music was for us, a REFUGE! But that outsider status has not only been stripped from Bruce, but the business at large. Now the business is one of INSIDERS. Run by pricks who were goody-goodies in school, who did everything their parents told them to, so they could end up on top of the heap. One of the reasons the business used to work is it was peopled by these same outsiders, who couldn’t work anywhere else. All they had was their passion for the music. And this translated. They didn’t want to work acts that were salable, they wanted to promote acts that touched their hearts, that MOVED THEM!
I guarantee you I reach more people every day than anybody on this list other than the rock stars. But I’m still alienated, I still feel like an outsider, it’s who I am. And the main reason I write is to touch those of you who feel the same way. Who just couldn’t play by the rules. Who just don’t give a shit about the system.
And that’s who Bruce Springsteen is.
And it’s this that drew me to his music. It was "Spirit In The Night" off the first album that hooked me. Every time I hear it I think of that summer night in Bennington, Vermont skinny-dipping with a girl I could have put myself inside of if I’d only tried, if my good buddy wasn’t under the illusion that he had a relationship with her.
But what truly sold me was "The Wild, the Innocent & the E Street Shuffle". I didn’t LOVE the first album, he wasn’t the new Dylan, but I decided to give him one more chance. And on his second album, Bruce Springsteen was imitating no one, he was suddenly himself. He was the front man of a big band. "Incident On 57th Street" into "Rosalita" was an epic. I had to go see him at the Bottom Line. That summer of ’74.
You could still get a ticket. "Born To Run" was fourteen months away. But I got there early, so I could be right up close by the stage.
Bruce killed. He was everything that Jon Landau said he was. And the yet to be released "Jungleland" played as an epic the first time through. Meet me beneath that giant Exxon sign…
History has been rewritten. "Born To Run" was not a gangbusters success upon release. Bruce didn’t become a cultural icon until "The River". And then, with "Born In The U.S.A", it went over the top. Suddenly, everybody was a Bruce Springsteen fan. And nothing could be more of a turn-off. I mean this guy was OURS!
Bruce has floundered ever since. Done some great stuff. Like "Tunnel Of Love". And "The Streets Of Philadelphia". But the success spooked him. For despite being the biggest act in the world, he was still an alienated guy from New Jersey. He’s still an alienated guy from New Jersey. That’s why "The Rising" fell so flat. The real Bruce Springsteen didn’t make it by delivering what he thought we wanted, being who we wanted him to be, but by just following his muse, doing his best to connect with the raw power of the MUSIC!
I’m not a fan of "Devils & Dust". But I applaud him for trying. For, if you continue to give the public what it wants, that’s artistic death.
I don’t know if Bruce can ever regain his pitch. He’s been bounced around too much. It all worked best when he was on the outside. Then he found himself on the inside, and when it didn’t solve all his problems he became disillusioned. Nobody wants to hear the complaints of a rich millionaire. But I believe it was never about the money with Springsteen, it was about ACCEPTANCE, on his own TERMS! If he could just do it his way, you’d SEE! Here’s hoping he continues to do it his way.
Meanwhile, we’ve got to tolerate the ongoing press hoopla. Fed by those in control of the media who personify the fans I detailed above. Johnny-come-latelies who put on their leather jackets for the show and then go back to suburbia in their German cars and drive back into the city the next morning to rape and pillage the country whilst filling their pocketbooks. These aren’t Bruce Springsteen fans. These are part of the problem, not part of the solution.
And I thought Sirius’ 24/7 Springsteen channel was going to be part of the problem too, until I heard a live take of "Wild Billy’s Circus Story". Then I knew, somebody cared.
Bruce doesn’t sound good next to other acts. But give him his own station and it’s like reading a novel. You only read one book at a time, it takes HOURS! You revel in the experience, you marinate in the words. Playing Sirius 10, you get down with Bruce Springsteen.
Now I’m not a fan of the sound of Sirius. It’s just too thin.
But my car stereo is topnotch. Now, with the subwoofer, it finally sings. So, Sirius is somewhat tolerable, I’ve been listening. And when I heard "My Lover Man" on the way to the shrink today I was reminded of the experience, the rock and roll experience. I couldn’t get out of the car. Fearful of being late, I finally wrote down the name of the track and bolted.
I came home and futilely tried to download "My Lover Man".
When it didn’t appear, I Googled Bruce. Found out the song was on the boxed set, which I never really got into, it was just too much. I’d given up with "Human Touch"…
Once again, it takes a deejay to extract the greatness from a seemingly impenetrable collection.
"My Lover Man" doesn’t have a killer hook. It’s all feel. It’s "My Hometown" with a beat. It’s Bruce testifying. It was cut in 1990, but it’s got the soul of the seventies, from before "Born In The U.S.A."
Your life with her turned to black
And now you want our love back
Well come into my arms and fall, my lover man
Life isn’t like it is in the movies. Not like it is in a boy band record. Not even like it is on a rap record. Life is about losing more than winning. It’s unpredictable. Just when you think you’ve got it all figured out, you’re surprised, turns out you don’t know shit.
You believe you’ve moved on to greener pastures. You’ve left the bullshit behind for something better. Then it all blows up in your face. You find out you were better off where you were before.
This is the story that’s played out across America every day. You leave your hometown, trying to reinvent yourself. You get a beachhead, you might even get married. But then you come home for your high school reunion, and you realize what you left behind is what’s truly meaningful. You abandon your new life, if it hasn’t abandoned you first.
This is the life Bruce Springsteen illuminates. The blind corners and back alleyways of EVERYBODY’S life. Nobody’s got it wired. Not Donald Trump, not the rest of the people on television. It’s just an illusion. It’s the job of the rock star to cut through that illusion, and reveal truth.
That’s why Bruce Springsteen became an icon. He revealed our truth. And this resonated so much that he blinked. Got a very public divorce. Laid off his band. The brass ring was always supposed to be out of reach. Then again, maybe he was just living one of his own songs.
Don’t iconize Bruce Springsteen. Don’t go to his shows yelling for your favorites. Leave the man alone. He bears no responsibility. It’s not his duty to give a musical face to the nation’s 9/11 grief. That was a misstep. What we want Bruce Springsteen to do is stay home. Go for a long drive in his Thunderbird. Go play arcade games at the beach. And tell us how he FEELS about it. Without worrying whether we identify.
Bruce Springsteen’s been swinging for the fences. And missing. And it’s painful to watch. Bringing the E Street Band out of retirement so we can relive our youth. Bruce was never a star on the field. He was always the guy outside who couldn’t afford a ticket, who couldn’t get in. He wasn’t a winner, he was a loser.
But, even the losers get lucky sometimes.
Oh, it’s not solely luck. Everybody’s number comes up. If they keep playing the game. Someone recognizes your greatness, someone gets you. Which is why it bothered us not a whit that Candy was BRUCE’S! He wasn’t boasting like a rapper. He didn’t get Candy because of his riches or his fame, but because of who he was, a hard-working musician with something to say. We were happy for him. Because we too were dreaming of the day the Candy in our lives would be ours too.
Instead of lionizing Bruce Springsteen, instead of going to the show and adoring him, why don’t you try to be Bruce-like in your own life. Why don’t you say what you mean, instead of what’s expected of you. Why don’t you lay out your truth. Then, maybe you too will be successful. But don’t be surprised if your success freaks you out, just as it did Bruce. This isn’t the way it’s supposed to be. You’re supposed to win by playing the game, not throwing the rule book out. But that’s in the real world, not in the world of rock and roll. I live in the world of rock and roll. And it’s artists like Bruce Springsteen that let me know this was a place worth living, that I didn’t have to cross the river and reside in a land where no one understood me, where I had to be phony, where I was always on the bottom. In the world of rock and roll, I’m a king. Because I’m not alone. I’m surrounded by people who get it, who know that a three minute song means more than anything the President might say. Rock and roll is a whole life. Don’t come to town, don’t come into the rock and roll pool unless you’re willing to leave all your emotional trappings behind, willing to chuck it all and let the music move and direct you. It’s a full time job. You can’t come to the show and then go home across the river to the other world. You’ve got to have the mentality ALL THE TIME! You’ve got to BELIEVE!
Bruce Springsteen believes.
And that’s why we believe in him.