The Heart Of The Matter
This will not be the last time I write about this song.
They say that "Smells Like Teen Spirit" is the record of the nineties. I
don’t want to argue that. Kurt Cobain was immensely talented. There was an
immediacy in that record that represents the zeitgeist of rock and roll. For the
purists in their black jeans and leather jackets it’s definitive.
But it’s not my favorite.
Maybe I disagree with the standard line. Maybe it’s not about how simple you
can make it, how raw. Maybe I’m looking for something different. Maybe I’m
looking for insight.
There’s a reason that Don Henley is so reviled yet so revered. A reason that
despite being perceived as a pompous prick he still maintains a popular
profile. It’s his music.
Now maybe most musicians don’t go on the record, maybe some aren’t so
knee-jerk. Or maybe when you’re supremely talented you’ve got no time for fools.
But, at the end of the day, it’s not about the man anyway, it’s about the music.
"The End Of The Innocence" is one of the most uneven major albums of all
time. Rockers like "I Will Not Go Quietly" and "Shangri-La" would not only fail
to make the cut on an Eagles album, they wouldn’t pass muster on a Bob Seger
record either. They’re just THIS side of forgettable. "Little Tin God" and
"How Bad Do You Want It" are only marginally superior. The latter sports a
memorable lyric, but the music sounds like it was written by two drummers, which it was (oh, Danny Kortchmar threw his hand in with Henley and Stan Lynch, but he was never notable for his sense of melody). "If Dirt Were Dollars" we can
put in the same barely adequate category. As a matter of fact, the only rocker
that is beyond passable on the album is "Gimme What You Got". But OH, the
ballads.
The innocence truly ended fifteen years ago. That’s when the final chapter
was written. When America fully diverged into the haves and have-nots.
There’s a laconic groove to "The End Of The Innocence" which is infectious. And
there’s not a wasted word evident. No false rhyme. To get it this right is to
evidence a level of skill almost NO ONE has. To fit words perfectly to a
melody, this is something novelists can’t do. "The End Of The Innocence" is pure
poetry. And that’s probably why it’s remembered more, has more impact than all
the forgotten books of the nineties.
On a Glenn Frey album, on ANYBODY else’s album, "New York Minute" would be the showpiece. It’s great, just not on the level of the other ballads on this
record. Not of the caliber of "The Last Worthless Evening".
You can’t be with someone new
And you can’t go back with him
For the flow of endless words in rap lyrics they don’t evidence this pure,
deep situation so simply. Oh, you can kick someone to the curb. You can fall
in love deeply. But what if you want to move on, but you CAN’T! This isn’t
even part of the rap ETHOS! But it’s not only rap, it’s seemingly all popular
music. There’s no truth.
There’s line after line that resonates in "The Last Worthless Evening". But
what’s even better is the SOUND of the record. You can HEAR
the nascent hope, that inner glow when you’re just about ready
to go back on the market, when your optimism is just coming ’round.
Still, as fantastic as "The Last Worthless Evening" is,
it’s not "The Heart Of The Matter".
"The Heart Of The Matter" is the finale. The one the Eagles WANTED for
"Hotel California" and "The Long Run" but couldn’t muster. The one that sums up
the album whilst bringing in new elements that leaves you in silent
contemplation when it ends.
Kids think life is a wild adventure, getting ever better, until you get what
you want, until you win. But one of the secrets of aging is finding out this
isn’t true.
I don’t think you can be fifteen and really get "The Heart Of The Matter".
You have to have been THROUGH things, you have to have played and lost. Not be devastated like a twelve year old whose crush has dissed him, but
knowledgeable that although you’re prone now, you’re gonna have to slowly pick yourself up, and play again. Eventually. When the pain stops.
The reason that "The Heart Of The Matter" doesn’t make the all time great
lists is the people who make up these lists are adolescents. They’ve sacrificed
for rock and roll. It’s all they believe in, it’s all they’ve got. They
never grew up. They don’t realize that without relationships, you possess
nothing, you haven’t lived life. They don’t want to age, Which is why they
constantly champion the three chord efforts of Nirvana then the Strokes and who knows next. Because to be an adult is anathema.
I got the call today, I didn’t wanna hear
But I knew that it would come
An old true friend of ours was talkin’ on the phone
She said you found someone
Just like you want to believe your present girlfriend never fucked anybody
before you, you want to believe your old girlfriend will never fuck anybody
again. It’s primal. Intellectually you know you have to let them go. But you
can’t. You put in the effort, you were dedicated, you couldn’t live together,
but you’re not ready to throw out what you had, you want to hold it close.
Forever.
And I thought of all the bad luck,
And the struggles we went through
And how I lost me and you lost you
What are these voices outside love’s open door
Make us throw off our contentment
And beg for something more?
That’s what makes "The Heart Of The Matter" so spectacular. The VIEWPOINT!
It’s not that of the classic dumpee. It’s a twist on the formula. He broke
up with HER, but still…he can’t get over her. And, if you can you’re not
human. But the nature of life is you only get one go-round, and sometimes deep
inside you know this is not it, however good it is, there’s something more out
there. The weak wait to meet that person and then jump ship. The strong
break up with only a dream. They’re willing to fly solo, possibly forever, in the
hope that they’ll be delivered, they’ll get the elusive thing they’re looking
for.
I’m learning to live without you now
But I miss you sometimes
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I knew, I’m learning again
The living without is the hardest part. It’s what keeps most people
together. It’s not only the sleeping alone, you’re suddenly a social outcast. You’re
not in college anymore. If you’re single, there’s nowhere to hang, and
nowhere you really want to go. You put one foot in front of the other blindly,
wondering where you’re going, feeling depressed, but knowing the only way out is
forward.
As for the learning again… Off the market you have an illusion. You not
only forget about courtship, you forget about the electricity of meeting
someone. No, that you experience. Now and again. Rather, you forget that it takes much more than a spark to get a fire started. A wink, a good conversation,
it’s not enough. You endure false start after false start. Until suddenly,
without even realizing it, you’re playing again. It’s like fishing. When the
fish finally bites. You feel the tug, and the struggle begins. Hooking them
is only the beginning of the process, you’ve got to reel them in. Oh, you’re
elated as you wind the crank, but you know until they’re in the boat, you’ve
got nothing. But what you do have is SO MUCH MORE than just casting your line in the water. And you’ve fished so much. You’d think you’d have it down. But
really, every line out there is different, every fish gives you a different
fight, no matter how many you’ve landed, it’s still a learning process. You’d
think at thirty, forty, maybe even FIFTY you’d have it down. But inside you
feel like a teenager, awkward and fragile.
I’ve been tryin’ to get down to the heart of the matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it’s about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don’t love me anymore
I don’t think it’s about forgiveness.
But she did. It happened in two stages. First she called me and mentioned
this song. It sounded differently thereafter. It hadn’t even been released
until after we broke up. To think that she was listening and resonating with it
as I was was spooky. But I was the one who was left behind, she was the one
who did the leaving. Freaked her when I found someone new, but it didn’t take.
And then years went by.
And then came that phone call wherein she asked for forgiveness. On no less
than Yom Kippur, the Day Of Atonement.
I said no. I can never forgive her. I think that’s new age bullshit.
Everybody wants to be let off the hook, nobody wants to take responsibility. Your actions have consequences. They hurt people. Own it.
There are people in your life who’ve come and gone
They let you down and hurt your pride
Better put it all behind you; life goes on
You keep carryin’ that anger, it’ll eat you inside
Easier said than done. But finally, it all seems meaningless. She no longer
plays a part in my sexual fantasies. I wonder where she is, what she’s
doing, but I no longer want to be with her. I want to start over. With someone
new.
But I’ve had to learn the process all over again. And what I found out was
what I learned the very first time I fell in love. That you can’t fake it, you
know it when you feel it. And it takes two. It’s got to be reciprocal. And
when it is, it’s unlike anything else in the universe, it’s like this is the
reason you’re living, to be on the same wavelength as this other person.
My favorite version of "The Heart Of The Matter" on my computer is purely
acoustic. It starts off with just a guitar, and then Don comes in, singing like
he’s been out in the cold, out in the woods, in the snow, and has finally
stumbled in to tell his story.
And it’s not like he’s talking down to us. Rather, by revealing his truth,
what happened to him, our own lives come clear. It’s this reason we listen to
music. Oh, it’s got to sound good. But when it sounds good and there’s
truth, and insight, there’s a magic that makes this life worth living. Oh, it’s
not quite the connection with another human being, but it asks less, it’s less
uncomfortable, it’s soothing, you can count on it, when you need it, when
you’re alone, when you have more questions than answers.
To deliver all this is pure artistry. Someone with this talent cannot retire
and go to work at the label. Nor can he switch careers and become a lawyer
or stockbroker. No, art is a calling. Something only the artist truly
understands, but all can appreciate.
I don’t know what makes "The Heart Of The Matter" so superior. Whether it’s
Mike Campbell’s musical contribution. Or the turn of the phrase of J.D.
Souther. All I do know is it’s subtle perfection. Something that gets inside you
and you can’t forget. Something you sing to yourself when you need
accompaniment, when you need to be assured.
Life is an enigma. The only guidance available comes from art. Art isn’t
telling you what to do like your parents and teachers. Rather, art is
ILLUSTRATIVE! "The Heart Of The Matter" lays out the human condition like a Russian novel. It does not get its due. In the parlance of the youth, it does not get
the props it deserves. Maybe to do so would make those anointing greatness
uncomfortable. But those who’ve been exposed, those who’ve been infected know
that "The Heart Of The Matter" is beyond memorable, it’s HERE! No song doctor is necessary, no negativity can be employed, it’s just perfect as it is.