Miami 2024

“You know those lights were bright on Broadway

That was so many years ago

Before we all lived here in Florida…”

“Miami 2017”

Billy Joel

Hasn’t Billy moved to Florida, and Howard Stern for a lot of the time too?

Actually, I first heard this song in 1981, as the opener of Billy’s “Songs in the Attic,” live versions of numbers that were previously cut in the studio that Mr. Joel felt didn’t get proper treatment, and now after a trifecta of hit albums, it was finally time.

Actually, “Miami 2017” was originally on “Turnstiles,” the overlooked 1976 album that convinced Billy to stop self-producing and work with Phil Ramone, and the rest is history. But pound for pound, “Turnstiles” is fantastic. It includes the original “New York State of Mind” and “Summer, Highland Falls,” which follows up “Miami 2017” on “Songs in the Attic” in a rollicking version. (I was looking for a description, I couldn’t quite nail one in my head. It’s fast, but not exactly jaunty. Let me just go with the generic it’s GREAT!)

And the thing about “Turnstiles” is it was made when Billy was on the downswing, so it’s personal in a way what came thereafter was not. Kinda like David Gray’s “White Ladder.” You could picture Billy on the New York Thruway, you could see him in the Catskills.

And that’s a state of mind I know so well, it’s in my DNA, but instead of decamping for Florida, I came to Los Angeles. And in the meantime, Miami became hip.

You’ve got to know, it was where old Jews went to die. Where those with money vacationed during the winter, you know, the people whose parents drove Cadillacs.

And then Madonna came along and then “Miami Vice” and cocaine and… Funny these United States, you see it on TV, but until you actually go there, you don’t really get it.

That’s what I was thinking in the drive from the airport. Used to be we were all focused on the same things. I just asked a woman with daughters to name me two Taylor Swift songs and she couldn’t. You get the impression from the media that we’re all focused on the same things, but never has America been so Balkanized, at least in my lifetime. In other words, what happens in Miami may not travel to the west coast, and vice versa.

Actually, I regretted booking a hotel downtown, I thought we should have stayed at the airport, like Steve and Nancy. We weren’t going to arrive until 7 and had to be out just twelve hours later.

But I was wrong, because if we’d stayed at the airport I would have missed it.

This is not the Miami of my youth, not that I ever went there, but Jackie Gleason used to do his show from there, and the Beatles played “Ed Sullivan” down there. But the landscape was not populated with skyscrapers. Empty skyscrapers.

America is now about the haves and have-nots. And barring some economic revolution, it’s going to stay that way. Then again, there’d be a revolution if the poor saw how the rich truly live.

If you’re checking your wallet, you don’t belong in Miami, at least not downtown, by Riverwalk.

It’s kind of like “Blade Runner.” Tower after tower. Each one more than half dark. Because the wealthy now have multiple homes, and this is shoulder season, it’s not quite cold enough in the northeast to decamp.

And it’s the three rules of real estate, location, location, location. As in how close to the water you can be.

And to tell you the truth, if I told you I’ve seen more than twenty five minutes of “Miami Vice,” I’d be lying. But it’s midnight, and yachts are cruising, music blasting, such that you can hear it up on the 24th floor as the boats idle waiting for the bridge to rise.

There are boats in Marina Del Rey, but you don’t see them unless you go there, whereas just downtown… Actually, a hundred footer was docked right outside the hotel. And two other yachts almost as big. And I’m asking myself which comes first, the yacht or the jet. Probably the jet. But do you really need to own a yacht? I mean most people are on them even less than the number of days people spend in these Miami residential towers.

But it’s part of the lifestyle.

I mean you’re looking out at the lights, which don’t quite rival Broadway, but it’s far from dark, and you stare at the boats and you can see it…cocaine. I don’t think you can bring in Bolivian Marching Powder by boat these days, never mind marijuana, but they once did.

As Jimmy Buffett would say, it’s a haven of pirates.

And to tell you the truth, the rich aren’t that law-abiding. How do you think they made that money?

But it’s overwhelming, and inspiring, and HOT! If these people just flew to Los Angeles I doubt they’d buy in Miami. It’s the HUMIDITY! It never feels this hot in L.A., never ever. Up until climate change reared its ugly head you didn’t even need A/C on the westside, even the houses of the rich were naturally cooled.

But not anymore.

And Miami is just three hours from New York. A hop and a skip, but no jump is required. And what you’ve got to know is the east coast mentality is completely different from the west. No one drives ten hours on a whim. And a New Yorker will tell you that the city is the greatest in the world, and there’s no telling them otherwise.

Actually, I might agree, and I’d like a condo there, but I wouldn’t want to live there.

So Miami is New York south, with a whole lot of Spanish speaking people. Every Uber driver. It reminded me of that TV series “StartUp,” which is ultimately unsatisfying but I’m glad I saw it. You’ve got the Latin culture and the dope and it’s visceral and includes the Miami you think you know and the one you don’t.

The U.S. is about the hustle. Sure, there are some entertainers, some tech titans, but everybody else is looking for an edge, a way in, a way to lift their lifestyle above the hoi polloi. And Miami is one place you can do it.

So I rode the elevator down to Riverwalk, which was just outside the door. Can you walk alone in the dark at ten p.m. in Miami? I mean for a long while you couldn’t in New York City, but still…you think before you take chances.

But I’m out there, walking past the hotels, the restaurants, the occasional person, and it was palpable, you could feel the vibe, the opportunity of the city.

Now unlike L.A., if you want to play you’ve got to have the clothes. This may be the beach, but if you’re wearing flip-flops you’re either filthy rich and don’t care, or you’re part of the underclass.

Everybody’s flashing it.

Everybody wants to show up and show off. I saw outfits which never appear in L.A. A one piece green thing with sparkles, a similar tight outfit in red…

That was at the restaurant, not out on the walk.

And the restaurant got busier as the night wore on.

We all want to play, we all want to exhibit our bona fides, evidence our quality, whether it be money, looks, talent, intellect or all of them. Some lick their wounds afraid they’ll lose. But the brave and the ignorant show up. Sometimes the less you know, the further you go.

And I know, I know, they tried to establish a new Silicon Valley in Miami and they failed, even New York has a hard time competing with the real thing.

And you’ve got all the rich New Yorkers who’ve moved for the tax benefits, including those teetering on bankruptcy who want to keep their houses.

And then there are the South Americans. That’s not something you see in L.A.

And all you had to do was go outside, for a walk, or sit on the balcony, and you could feel it. It’s different, and exciting, and hot! People spending all that money to shvitz?

But this is where you go to impress.

Miami has moved beyond the dope and even the partying of the eighties and nineties. It’s now the big time.

And I’m no longer there.

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