CURB YOUR ENTHUSIASM

It’s been a lackluster season. It didn’t really warm up until Larry got to New York. And the arrival of Leon in Larry’s Prius, not wanting to endure airport security for a cross-country flight, was a masterstroke.

But the piece de resistance was not last night’s stunting with Mayor Bloomberg, or even the Parkinson’s-addled Michael J. Fox, but Jennifer’s son Greg.

My two favorite "Curb" moments ever were:

1. When Larry cuts the hair off of Jeff and Susie’s kid’s doll and Susie finds out and yells, "Larry, YOU SICK FUCK!"

Maybe it’s being Jewish, knowing women who know no bounds, who say what they feel and believe they will be loved anyway…I understand this performance. But I’ve never seen it on TV. You’re attracted as you’re repelled. In a world where everybody’s duplicitous, fearful of speaking the truth, playing the game to get ahead, Susie Greene is not just a breath of fresh air, she’s a hurricane, a tornado, an undeniable force.

2. The episode when Larry and Cheryl go to the ski chalet. And Larry ends up on the broken chairlift with the Super-Jew (that’s what we Reform Jews call the ultra-observant), and the sun is setting and the young woman says she can’t be with a man overnight, Larry’s going to have to jump. And Larry says…ARE YOU FUCKING NUTS?

That’s the way we say it. And Larry’s been playing along, trying to fake it for the whole stay in the mountains, but this is just too much. Another Jewish moment… When pressed against the wall, you speak the truth.

And last week’s show with Mister Softee was good.  And the orgasm-inducing Prius.

But last night’s final episode had a gem for the ages. The aforementioned performance of Jennifer’s son Greg.

Larry’s waiting for Jennifer to get ready, to go out, and he’s doodling a Hitler moustache on a pic in a magazine. And that comes back into play, as things do on "Curb Your Enthusiasm", isn’t it funny to know all these years later that the genius of "Seinfeld" was Larry, not Jerry. Like the marble rye. But it’s the boy’s performance that has me smiling right now.

This year’s Larry has been a bit less obstinate than the old Larry, almost normal, almost like you and me. And when he’s confronted with this kid who says that "Project Runway" is "The best show ever!"…

You’re thinking exactly what Larry is. This seven year old is gay.

And when Larry buys Greg a sewing machine for his birthday, his mother is appalled, but Greg is THRILLED! Susie implores Larry to get another gift, which ends up being a violin, which placates Jennifer and Susie, but…

Greg will have nothing of it. He LOVES his sewing machine.

As for what he makes with it, his gift for Susie, if you saw the show you’re laughing right now…

ENTOURAGE

It jumped the shark. So who expected a finale so good?

Vince’s character has always rung hollow, he’s the emptiness at the center of the show, Johnny Drama and Turtle are more convincing, even though they’re second-bananas, but Vince was the key to this episode.

Yes, his instant marriage was ridiculous, like that "Vanity Fair" reporter would really do a 180 and agree to date him, never mind marry him, as if Vince could suddenly become faithful, as if an intellectual could find happiness with an actor…didn’t work for Tom Hayden and Jane Fonda, he ended up shtupping his educated coworker! But Vince is the one who brings everybody together. As lame as the underlying concept is, of buddies living together, the underlying loyalty is appealing, taking a bullet for one another (wait, that was on Larry’s show!) So, when everybody races about trying to do the right thing, it’s incredibly appealing in a world where no one does the right thing, certainly not immediately, certainly not on instinct.

Which is why we accept Ari leaving the agency. Finally, he sees that his marriage and his kids are more important than any job. As for that wife, I’d leave her for Dana in a minute. If she doesn’t eat soon, she’s gonna die! When they look that skinny on TV, you know if they turn sideways in real life you’ll miss them.

With all the stunt casting and ridiculous plot turns "Entourage" had become about the trappings, the substance had evaporated.

And Raisin Face was on the show last night, that’s what Perez Hilton used to call Rachel Zoe before he took his inane pledge to be nice. But he was right. If Perez doesn’t make fun of Zoe, who will?

Just like the Kardashians…  The brood showed up at the U.S. Open and the announcer said the stars were here. Howard Stern questioned this. Can we all agree the Kardashians are nitwits and stop giving them our money, so they’ll get an education and get real jobs and work for a living?

And the coda was ridiculous, just a set-up for the eventual movie.

Couldn’t Ari go out as a changed man, who realized who he was, did not deny elements of his personality, like calling the protesting Lloyd "The gay son he never wanted.", but didn’t capitulate to his dark side?

Ari’s the only adult on the show, in a sea of adolescents. He was a beacon of truth. Couldn’t truth be that there’s something more important than Hollywood?

I guess not.

But the "Entourage" finale brought a tear to my eye. Because when stories are done right, you believe the people involved are those characters, they become your friends.

Like I said, I never believed Vince as a movie star.

And Eric wasn’t believable as a manager.

But Dana was a spot-on biological time clock ticking cutthroat studio executive, who wants to be soft, but never can be, because she’s playing in a man’s world.

And Scott was the conniving, hungry manager Eric never was.

And Ari was L.A. personified. Everybody’s friend until he no longer needed to be. And then friends again when it was expedient.

The moral code of Hollywood is nonexistent. It’s every man for himself. That was Ari’s battle, between morality and money, between humanity and power.

Last night humanity won.

Until the very end.

I’d cut off that coda in reruns. We want to believe in redemption. And last night "Entourage" redeemed itself from years of idiotic, devolving behavior. I’ll miss it. Like you do with all your good friends.