{"id":640,"date":"2007-01-06T08:51:58","date_gmt":"2007-01-06T16:51:58","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/index.php\/archives\/2007\/01\/06\/my-dinner-with-grubiss\/"},"modified":"2007-01-06T08:51:58","modified_gmt":"2007-01-06T16:51:58","slug":"my-dinner-with-grubiss","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/2007\/01\/06\/my-dinner-with-grubiss\/","title":{"rendered":"My Dinner With Grubiss"},"content":{"rendered":"

Met my old lover in the grocery store
The snow was falling Christmas Eve<\/em><\/p>\n

Hughes gave up the book business in New York to move to Denver to become a teacher.\u00c2\u00a0 I became involved with Felice, whose family owned a condo in Vail.\u00c2\u00a0 And thus a reunion was held.\u00c2\u00a0 Last summer.\u00c2\u00a0 2005.\u00c2\u00a0 On a rainy day at 8,000 feet.<\/p>\n

Since that time we’ve connected more.\u00c2\u00a0 John came to ski for the day last Christmas, and we stayed at his and Carie’s house this summer.\u00c2\u00a0 And with the rest of the family gone on New Year’s Eve, I implored Mr. Hughes to come stay the night, so we could catch up, so we could bond.<\/p>\n

John responded that that would not be possible.\u00c2\u00a0 But that he’d come for the day.\u00c2\u00a0 But when I finally got ahold of him last Friday, to see if he was actually arriving the following day as planned, he balked.\u00c2\u00a0 But said that he would be staying the night after all, that he would arrive on Tuesday, the 2nd.<\/p>\n

After a knock on the door at the appointed hour, the three of us exited the condo and proceeded to tear the place up.\u00c2\u00a0 Working the bowls from Game Creek to Siberia and even venturing out to Blue Sky Basin.<\/p>\n

And after drinking hot chocolate in the lobby of the Lodge, after catching up in the living room of the condo, Felice implored us to get ready for dinner, none of us having had lunch.<\/p>\n

I told Hughes we were going to our country club, a very exclusive place.\u00c2\u00a0 Which he bought, after all Felice’s family has style.\u00c2\u00a0 But wanting to keep it a secret, I ended up letting him in on the joke.\u00c2\u00a0 That we were going to the MINTURN Country Club, the motto of which is "Where the only thing missing is the golf course."\u00c2\u00a0 Yes, the Minturn Country Club is a low rent steak and salad bar restaurant, akin to those that flourished in the seventies.\u00c2\u00a0 But what sets it apart, what makes it so special, is that you barbecue your own steaks.\u00c2\u00a0 You check the instructions posted on the wall, how long to cook each cut, and then you drop your meat over the coals and play Bobby Flay.\u00c2\u00a0 Painting on teriyaki sauce, throwing on a bit of lemon pepper and garlic.<\/p>\n

After a quick shower, I descended to the main floor to find that John was on the phone.\u00c2\u00a0 With his wife I figured, since he hadn’t been able to get ahold of her earlier.<\/p>\n

And when that call was done, we went down to the lobby of the hotel, where the valet retrieved John’s car, and after entering and turning up the bun warmers, we got onto I-70 for our brief journey into backwoods Colorado.<\/p>\n

It was a beautiful night, almost a full moon, but it wasn’t eerie, it was a good time, a reconnection between college buddies and a newfound team member.<\/p>\n

We found a parking spot right by the entrance.\u00c2\u00a0 And after shuffling through the hanging plastic sheets keeping the cold from the warmth inside, we were informed that we’d have to wait, after all, it was still a holiday week.\u00c2\u00a0 The greeter implored us to hang out at the bar, which was centrally located in this bustling emporium.<\/p>\n

And when I finally arrived there, after a brief respite in the bathroom, John Hughes introduced me to this crazy foreign character with glasses who started going on about skiing with Sting in Las Lenas, and how the bard was quoting me.\u00c2\u00a0 Impressed, I looked around for Felice, wanting her to be in on the joy.<\/p>\n

But when I’d finally gathered Felice, John stopped the conversation.\u00c2\u00a0 He told this man with the accent to take off his glasses.\u00c2\u00a0 And then said to me "You don’t recognize him, do you?"<\/p>\n

She didn’t recognize the face at first
But then her eyes flew open wide<\/em><\/p>\n

I can ski on anything.\u00c2\u00a0 But I can’t ski on rocks, on dirt.\u00c2\u00a0 And the last year I was at Middlebury was the worst in ski history, to that point anyway.\u00c2\u00a0 The Snow Bowl was CLOSED many days of the winter.\u00c2\u00a0 And sometime during those dark days, I vowed when I graduated, I would go to Utah, where the most guaranteed snow was, and get a job at Alta, and ski EVERY DAY!<\/p>\n

I packed up my new automobile on the evening of Labor Day 1974, and the following morning took off, for Kansas City, where John Hughes and Steve Grubiss, my big college buddies, lived.<\/p>\n

Hughes was on his way to getting married.\u00c2\u00a0 Grubiss was going to start law school.\u00c2\u00a0 But when I showed up, Grubiss changed course, he didn’t really want to go to school, he would come with ME, and be a ski bum in Utah.<\/p>\n

But having a few details to clear up, he wouldn’t be riding shotgun from K.C. to Salt Lake City, rather he’d fly in, after I’d arrived.<\/p>\n

And this he did.\u00c2\u00a0 After I’d arranged a gig as a waiter at the Goldminer’s Daughter, the closest lodge to the lifts in Alta, a mere fifty feet away.<\/p>\n

Grubiss got a job at the Alta Peruvian.\u00c2\u00a0 And started right away.<\/p>\n

I ventured to Los Angeles.\u00c2\u00a0 Where I got a job at Star Sporting Goods on Highland, just south of Sunset.\u00c2\u00a0 And then in a freak accident, the first week of November, I broke my leg.\u00c2\u00a0 So I didn’t show up in Alta a week later.<\/p>\n

This was before the days of cell phones.\u00c2\u00a0 And you can only imagine how depressed I was.<\/p>\n

I never called Grubiss.<\/p>\n

He kept waiting for me to arrive.<\/p>\n

Finally, just after New Year’s, he gave up.\u00c2\u00a0 And went back to K.C.<\/p>\n

And I never saw him again.\u00c2\u00a0 Until Tuesday night.<\/p>\n

We drank a toast to innocence
We drank a toast to time<\/em><\/p>\n

I was embarrassed.\u00c2\u00a0 I was shocked.\u00c2\u00a0 After all, I’d left Grubiss in the lurch.<\/p>\n

But he didn’t remember it the same way, he seemed not to care.<\/p>\n

So over iceberg lettuce and runny dressing we caught up.<\/p>\n

Or mostly, I listened.\u00c2\u00a0 How Steve had gone back to law school at the University of Kansas, and had then practiced law in K.C.\u00c2\u00a0 How being too far from the mountains, he had eventually quit, and moved to Colorado, where he’d gotten married.<\/p>\n

But then that turned sour.\u00c2\u00a0 And he ventured to Oregon.\u00c2\u00a0 And then Taos, where he now makes his home.<\/p>\n

I could hardly speak.<\/p>\n

This was one of my closest friends.\u00c2\u00a0 Yet I hadn’t seen or spoken to him in thirty two years.<\/p>\n

And then, out of the blue, he started telling stories about my father.\u00c2\u00a0 Recalling not only shared memories, but stories I had forgotten.\u00c2\u00a0 Even\u00c2\u00a0 reciting the famous joke about the Fagowees.<\/p>\n

I told a few tales, one about getting arrested for drunk driving the night John Lennon was shot.\u00c2\u00a0 But mostly I listened.<\/p>\n

I implored Felice to tell the tale of spending the summer in Hawaii, with her father’s American Express card.<\/p>\n

And John informed Grubiss that both his parents were gone.<\/p>\n

I said my dad was dead too.\u00c2\u00a0 And I learned all these years later, that Steve’s father was a famous World War II pilot.<\/p>\n

Finally, as the din in the restaurant died, we exited.<\/p>\n

I rode back to the condo in Grubiss’ ’92 Dodge Stealth, the engine of which he’d rebuilt himself.<\/p>\n

And when finally back in the condo heat, I was caught between two worlds.\u00c2\u00a0 The one I presently live in, and the one where I used to reside, back in Vermont.<\/p>\n

Retiring after midnight, I had nightmares involving every facet of my life.\u00c2\u00a0 From my college days to my marriage.\u00c2\u00a0 And when I awoke, we all went to breakfast.<\/p>\n

And then John, who’d put this reunion together, having Googled Grubiss, started packing for his trip back to Denver.\u00c2\u00a0 I implored Grubiss to stay.\u00c2\u00a0 To ski.<\/p>\n

But the snow was too firm, he said.<\/p>\n

And then I realized, he was the same person he’d always been.\u00c2\u00a0 He still made decisions the same way.\u00c2\u00a0 Enthusiastically agreeing, and then debating the proper course of action.<\/p>\n

And the three of us are sitting there, in the downstairs bedroom, and suddenly I realized I’d been there before.\u00c2\u00a0 On winter mornings in college.\u00c2\u00a0 The endless philosophical bullshit sessions.<\/p>\n

John left.\u00c2\u00a0 Grubiss, vowing to come back when we returned, when the conditions were good, exited too.\u00c2\u00a0 And then Felice and I hit the mountain.<\/p>\n

But I couldn’t ski.\u00c2\u00a0 I lost an edge in the back bowls and almost tumbled.\u00c2\u00a0 If I’d been anywhere close to the bottom, I’d have quit.<\/p>\n

But I’m not a quitter.\u00c2\u00a0 And that’s one of the many things I had in common with Grubiss.\u00c2\u00a0 Both of us could play by the rules, but oftentimes tested them.\u00c2\u00a0 We knew the game, but didn’t want to play it.\u00c2\u00a0 Which left us in a strange netherworld.<\/p>\n

Steve had gone on to get an MBA.\u00c2\u00a0 He was number one in his class at the University of New Mexico.\u00c2\u00a0 But having achieved this personal goal, he turned down the job offer that came with it.\u00c2\u00a0 That just wasn’t the point.<\/p>\n

His life was not about what was expected, but what felt good.\u00c2\u00a0 It was not about slacking, but achievement.\u00c2\u00a0 Even if the achievement was incomprehensible to those in the mainstream.<\/p>\n

I made it to the lift.\u00c2\u00a0 But after a long traverse from the top of the mountain to our next descent, I stopped.\u00c2\u00a0 I felt like I had to speak, or I’d cry.\u00c2\u00a0 When Felice came up nearby, I opened my mouth, but nothing came out.\u00c2\u00a0 Finally, she asked me if I would see Grubiss again.<\/p>\n

And I was reminded of my mother attending her thirtieth college reunion, and bonding with all these buddies she hadn’t seen in eons.\u00c2\u00a0 Thereafter, they all became close friends again.\u00c2\u00a0 And still are.\u00c2\u00a0 Because the people you meet in college…\u00c2\u00a0 It’s when you’re still unformed, still raw, when you still have dreams, and plot how you’re going to achieve them.<\/p>\n

I’d like to tell you I’ve recovered.\u00c2\u00a0 But I don’t know where to place this rendezvous, this story.\u00c2\u00a0 If I’d had a laptop atop Vail I could have nailed it.\u00c2\u00a0 But when I got back to the condo, I was so drained I could barely stay awake, never mind type.<\/p>\n

And although we skied yesterday morning, the rest of the day was consumed with our return.<\/p>\n

And now I’d like to move on, and forget what happened.\u00c2\u00a0 But I’ve got nowhere to place this story, these feelings.<\/p>\n

Grubiss’ hair has turned gray.\u00c2\u00a0 A good portion of mine has gone.\u00c2\u00a0 The hourglass has more sand at the bottom than the top.\u00c2\u00a0 This is my life.\u00c2\u00a0 How very strange.<\/p>\n

<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Met my old lover in the grocery storeThe snow was falling Christmas Eve Hughes gave up the book business in New York to move to Denver to become a teacher.\u00c2\u00a0 I became involved with Felice, whose family owned a condo in Vail.\u00c2\u00a0 And thus a reunion was held.\u00c2\u00a0 Last summer.\u00c2\u00a0 2005.\u00c2\u00a0 On a rainy day […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-640","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-life"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p96vPs-ak","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/640","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=640"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/640\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=640"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=640"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=640"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}