My mother wants to sell the house in Vermont.<\/p>\n
I don’t know what to do with the past.\u00c2\u00a0 Oh, I own it, but is it still part of
me.\u00c2\u00a0 Who I used to be, am I still the same person?<\/p>\n
I didn’t go to the house in Vermont for fifteen years.\u00c2\u00a0 I couldn’t.\u00c2\u00a0 The last
time I was there was with Kim.\u00c2\u00a0 And my father.\u00c2\u00a0 They’re both gone.\u00c2\u00a0 Dad six
feet under, Kim who knows where.\u00c2\u00a0 I just couldn’t face the memories.<\/p>\n
But finally enough time passed.\u00c2\u00a0 Last summer I went.<\/p>\n
I’d like to tell you it was a piece of cake.\u00c2\u00a0 That the ghosts were gone.<\/p>\n
But they weren’t.<\/p>\n
When I went upstairs where Kim climbed on top of me for sex on New Year’s
Day, it felt like yesterday.<\/p>\n
As for my Dad, the Vermont house was his project.\u00c2\u00a0 He loved it.\u00c2\u00a0 He could
fiddle around with it in his inept way.\u00c2\u00a0 My father was a thinker, not a physical
man.\u00c2\u00a0 There was the time he tried to put a handle on the dust cover of my
turntable and cracked the damn thing.\u00c2\u00a0 And the time I caught him in his Marlboro
Man coat, cutting a tiny piece of wood with a CHAINSAW on top of the marble
entrance to the Manchester house.\u00c2\u00a0 I didn’t even know he OWNED a chainsaw.\u00c2\u00a0
And, as an Eagle Scout, I could just see the blade slicing through the branch,
digging into the marble and shrapnel flying and ambulance sirens blaring.<\/p>\n
Maybe that’s why my mother is selling the house.\u00c2\u00a0 Because, despite denials,
she can’t go either.\u00c2\u00a0 Now that my father, her husband, is gone.<\/p>\n
Still, I don’t want her to sell it.\u00c2\u00a0 Because if she does, I will lose some of
my past, I will no longer have a direct connection to Vermont, the most
influential place I’ve ever lived.\u00c2\u00a0 She says I can use the proceeds and stay in a
hotel, but that’s not the same as staying in your own place.\u00c2\u00a0 With one, you’re
a transient.\u00c2\u00a0 With the other, you’re a resident.<\/p>\n
But those days were a long time ago.\u00c2\u00a0 I went to college in Middlebury in the
seventies.\u00c2\u00a0 Although I frequented the Manchester house in the eighties, now my
life is L.A.-centric.\u00c2\u00a0 If I ski it’s in Mammoth, or Aspen.\u00c2\u00a0 Some place much
larger, much more exotic, with better conditions.<\/p>\n
If I go at all.<\/p>\n
Because, like the Vermont house, I’ve got too much wrapped up in skiing.\u00c2\u00a0 I
used to go every day.\u00c2\u00a0 To the Middlebury College Snow Bowl.\u00c2\u00a0 To Alta and
Snowbird for two years thereafter.\u00c2\u00a0 Oh, I’ve lost nothing in technique.\u00c2\u00a0 But, you
don’t get that edge unless you go for thirty days straight.\u00c2\u00a0 To possess that
confidence that allows you to dive into the trees like it’s an open slope.\u00c2\u00a0 It’s
kind of like running into an old girlfriend.\u00c2\u00a0 One who dumped you, who you
still love.\u00c2\u00a0 There’s still something there, but it’s just not the right fit.<\/p>\n
I was thinking of going to the Vermont house this summer.\u00c2\u00a0 Before my mother
decided to sell it.<\/p>\n
But then I kept hearing about Felice’s condo.\u00c2\u00a0 In Vail.\u00c2\u00a0 It seemed time to
start a new tradition.\u00c2\u00a0 I said we should go there.<\/p>\n
Even with no snow, I had mixed emotions.\u00c2\u00a0 I looked at the runs and thought of
days passed.\u00c2\u00a0 Yearned to do it again, but then thought of my boot problem,
how I just can’t get a pair that fits.\u00c2\u00a0 And how the Langes that used to be my
secret weapon were placed in the dumpster and I just can’t get the performance
out of any of the new boots.\u00c2\u00a0 Except for Langes, which are so narrow that the
pair I bought in 1996 almost had me giving up skiing.\u00c2\u00a0 And now I’m getting too
deep into it.\u00c2\u00a0 And that’s just the point.<\/p>\n
I did go boot shopping in Vail.<\/p>\n
But that was after we rode the Eagle Bahn gondola to Eagle’s Nest.\u00c2\u00a0 When I
realized I was still the same person.\u00c2\u00a0 When, across the valley, half-shrouded in
clouds, I got a glimpse of Mt. Holy Cross.\u00c2\u00a0 It was like all those days in
Vermont.\u00c2\u00a0 Gray days.\u00c2\u00a0 When you looked up at the mountains ensconced in clouds,
and knew it was snowing there.\u00c2\u00a0 When you were up there.\u00c2\u00a0 When you could see
only feet in front of you, but you were feeling completely alive, out in the
elements.<\/p>\n
The following day we rode the gondola in better weather for a hike.\u00c2\u00a0 First to
Felice’s father’s tree.\u00c2\u00a0 And then…<\/p>\n
Well, we had no plan.\u00c2\u00a0 But the hike to Mid-Vail was longitudinal.\u00c2\u00a0 It just
wasn’t strenuous enough.\u00c2\u00a0 Then again, do anything at this altitude and it’s an
effort, especially if you’ve just flown in from sea level.<\/p>\n
I suggested hiking to the top.\u00c2\u00a0 On the map there was a trail.\u00c2\u00a0 The
Kinnickinnick trail.\u00c2\u00a0 It started just below Look Ma, the legendary bump slope,
and then rose to…who knows where.<\/p>\n
Well, it was supposed to end up at the top.\u00c2\u00a0 But if we went straight up, we’d
never make it, it was too steep.\u00c2\u00a0 With every step, we breathed hard.\u00c2\u00a0 Until I
started sipping water, I felt I was going to fall over.<\/p>\n
But, after a couple of switchbacks, we entered the woods.\u00c2\u00a0 It was
SPECTACULAR!\u00c2\u00a0 Amidst the giant pines.\u00c2\u00a0 Gaining altitude was no longer an effort.\u00c2\u00a0 Every step revealed new treasures.<\/p>\n
Until we lost the trail.<\/p>\n
We found ourselves in the middle of an alien slope.\u00c2\u00a0 Where there were no
markers, only bear shit.<\/p>\n
I’ve got a healthy fear of bears.\u00c2\u00a0 I saw them every day at Philmont Scout
Ranch.\u00c2\u00a0 They’ll come up close and personal to people.\u00c2\u00a0 I’ve seen it.<\/p>\n
And now I was becoming mildly panicked.\u00c2\u00a0 Yes, we could pick our way down the
ski slope, but would we be killed by wildlife before we hit civilization?<\/p>\n
We had to climb back up.\u00c2\u00a0 We retraced our steps.\u00c2\u00a0 But we couldn’t find the
damn trail.<\/p>\n
But then, like angels, an elderly man and a younger woman appeared.\u00c2\u00a0 They
pointed the way.<\/p>\n
Still, we seemed to be going in the wrong direction.\u00c2\u00a0 And the signs were
confusing.\u00c2\u00a0 But then we exited right by Sun Down Bowl.<\/p>\n
That’s the essence of Vail.\u00c2\u00a0 The Back Bowls.\u00c2\u00a0 That’s what made it famous.\u00c2\u00a0
Two coffee cups embedded into the mountainside, the backside of the main ski
area.\u00c2\u00a0 Well, in the beginning anyway.\u00c2\u00a0 Since the seventies they’ve expanded.\u00c2\u00a0
There are now bowls extending for miles.<\/p>\n
I wanted to see more.\u00c2\u00a0 I convinced Felice to take Ptarmigan Loop.\u00c2\u00a0 Sure, it
was in the WRONG DIRECTION!\u00c2\u00a0 Away from the bottom.\u00c2\u00a0 But by my calculation, we’d
end up on a promontory, with a clear view of a bunch of 14,000 footers.<\/p>\n
I was right.\u00c2\u00a0 But what I didn’t account for was the goat shit.\u00c2\u00a0 Everywhere.\u00c2\u00a0
Shaped like the heroin capsules in "Maria Full Of Grace".\u00c2\u00a0 You couldn’t avoid
them.\u00c2\u00a0 The smell was horrific.\u00c2\u00a0 So bad it ruined the view.<\/p>\n
Still, by time we made it back to Eagle’s Nest, for the ride back down, we
were feeling self-satisfied, in that way physical exertion makes you.\u00c2\u00a0 You feel
like you’ve ACCOMPLISHED something.\u00c2\u00a0 That if you did this every day, you’d be
fulfilled.\u00c2\u00a0 Hell, that’s how I ended up going to college in Vermont to BEGIN
WITH!<\/p>\n
Thus, two days later, after a driving loop through Leadville and then
Breckenridge, to get a better handle on what was happening in this
part of Colorado, we found ourselves at Beaver Creek.<\/p>\n
Beaver Creek was part of the ’76 Olympic plan.\u00c2\u00a0 You remember, the Denver
OLYMPICS!<\/p>\n
Well, maybe you don’t.\u00c2\u00a0 That’s because they canceled them.\u00c2\u00a0 Because
environmentalists went nuclear.\u00c2\u00a0 They didn’t want all these facilities built in the
Colorado Rockies.\u00c2\u00a0 At the last minute the games were moved to Innsbruck.\u00c2\u00a0 But,
eventually, after tons of red tape, the premier site was erected, AFTER the ’76
games.\u00c2\u00a0 They call this facility Beaver Creek.<\/p>\n
Beaver Creek is primarily known for its high class appointments.<\/p>\n
But it’s also become legendary as the site of America’s World Cup downhill
ski race.\u00c2\u00a0 On the Birds Of Prey.<\/p>\n
Felice wanted to hike to the falls in East Vail.\u00c2\u00a0 But I lobbied hard for
Beaver Creek.\u00c2\u00a0 I wanted to get up close and personal to the Birds Of Prey.<\/p>\n
I’m here to tell you that the Birds Of Prey is frightening.\u00c2\u00a0 Even in the
summer, even with no snow.\u00c2\u00a0 To slide down this sheer slope at eighty miles an
hour, your hand touching the hill when you make a turn, requires cojones of steel.<\/p>\n
Not that Felice was impressed.\u00c2\u00a0 She kept cursing the woman in the hiking
office.\u00c2\u00a0 Who said this trail was in the woods.\u00c2\u00a0 It was a service road, strewn with
rocks, in the bright sun.<\/p>\n
And then it went uphill.\u00c2\u00a0 Which, at 10,000 feet, is truly a chore.<\/p>\n
But then, the road turned into a path.\u00c2\u00a0 And went into the woods.\u00c2\u00a0 And that’s
when it got frightening.<\/p>\n
The path was only one person wide.\u00c2\u00a0 Slip, and hopefully your will was in
order.\u00c2\u00a0 I was getting a bit freaked.\u00c2\u00a0 We hadn’t seen another soul, and although I
had hiking boots, Felice was in her New Balances.\u00c2\u00a0 I forged ahead, to maintain
progress, you don’t want to stop, you freeze.\u00c2\u00a0 I turned around to check on
Felice now and again and then I realized this endangered ME!\u00c2\u00a0 If I didn’t
concentrate on where I was stepping, where I was going, odds were I
was going to misstep!\u00c2\u00a0 And I didn’t want to bear the consequences.<\/p>\n
But then we hit a meadow.\u00c2\u00a0 We saw other people.\u00c2\u00a0 The trails joined.\u00c2\u00a0 It was
only a quarter mile to Beaver Lake, our chosen destination.<\/p>\n
Uphill, of course.<\/p>\n
And that’s when I found myself behind Felice.\u00c2\u00a0 Staring at her behind.<\/p>\n
I don’t think I’m quite like Kramer, not the quintessential assman, but watch
a female derriere in motion for more than a few minutes and you can’t help
it, I can’t help it, my member started to stir.<\/p>\n
The lake was beautiful.\u00c2\u00a0 It only took us about fifteen minutes to get there.\u00c2\u00a0
But the path continued.\u00c2\u00a0 I envisioned hiking just a bit further and ending up
on the other side, at the tiny sand beach, were we could enjoy some privacy.<\/p>\n
At first it was easy to convince Felice to keep climbing.<\/p>\n
But then she started to waver.<\/p>\n
So I enacted the ten minute rule.<\/p>\n
And when that wasn’t definitive, when that time had expired and it still
wasn’t clear where this trail was going, I enacted a new FIVE minute rule.\u00c2\u00a0 Which
I fudged by a couple of minutes.\u00c2\u00a0 But then even I had to admit it was
fruitless.\u00c2\u00a0 We were going up, but there was no destination in sight, we were off the
map, we had to stop.<\/p>\n
Right by a log, in fact.\u00c2\u00a0 One that Felice could place her arms upon while I…<\/p>\n
I ran it by her.<\/p>\n
I can’t say I always wanted to be a member of the mile high club, but this
was a chance to be a member of the TWO MILE HIGH club.<\/p>\n
No, she didn’t want to do it.\u00c2\u00a0 There was no one around now, but could we
COUNT on being alone?<\/p>\n
And just then, as if on cue, we heard a rustle.\u00c2\u00a0 And maybe forty feet up the
trail was an animal I didn’t want to wrestle.\u00c2\u00a0 Felice said it was a deer.\u00c2\u00a0
Looked like an elk to me.\u00c2\u00a0 Staring right at us.\u00c2\u00a0 They’re supposed to be afraid of
people, but way up here in the mountains did this animal get the memo?<\/p>\n
That seemed to prove the point.\u00c2\u00a0 We were so far from civilization that the
only thing we had to fear was the wildlife.<\/p>\n
So Felice took two steps up.\u00c2\u00a0 Turned around.\u00c2\u00a0 Leaned forward and placed her
hands on the log.<\/p>\n
I reached around, unbuttoned her jeans, and pulled them down to her ankles.<\/p>\n
Then, I dropped trou.\u00c2\u00a0 Pulled down her panties, and then my underwear.<\/p>\n
Well, first I thought it necessary to warm her up.\u00c2\u00a0 To get her in the mood.\u00c2\u00a0
I extended a digit and slowly stroked her pudenda.\u00c2\u00a0 And when the juices
started to flow, like two four-legged creatures in nature, I entered her from behind.<\/p>\n
I didn’t know whether to close my eyes and enjoy the physical ecstasy or to
keep them open and allow the beautiful scenery to enhance the moment.<\/p>\n
Finally, the laughing stopped.\u00c2\u00a0 The talking stopped.\u00c2\u00a0 We were doing it.<\/p>\n
And then, from up the hill, we heard another rustle.\u00c2\u00a0 I didn’t want to be in
flagrante delicto as some bear came to chew me up so I pulled out.\u00c2\u00a0 But, as I
turned around to confront my opponent I didn’t encounter an unreasonable
creature with a brain the size of an orange, rather it was a RANGER!\u00c2\u00a0 A FOREST
SERVICE RANGER!\u00c2\u00a0 Sauntering down the trail RIGHT AT US!<\/p>\n
I mean I’m shvitzing.\u00c2\u00a0 My pants won’t pull back up, they’re stuck.\u00c2\u00a0 Felice
has got her jeans above her waist, unbuttoned, but I can’t pull my trousers
above my underwear, which is stuck around my knees.<\/p>\n
And then she was upon us.\u00c2\u00a0 Yes, it was a she, a female Forest Service Ranger.<\/p>\n
What was going to happen?\u00c2\u00a0 Was she going to write us up?\u00c2\u00a0 Should we make a
run for it?\u00c2\u00a0 Was this even a crime?\u00c2\u00a0 Isn’t that what animals do, FUCK?<\/p>\n
Like Eddie Haskell or any other deviant caught doing something untoward I
chatted this twentysomething Ranger up.\u00c2\u00a0 Waxed rhapsodic about the landscape.\u00c2\u00a0
Asked her where the trail went.\u00c2\u00a0 And, when her pulse calmed down a bit, Felice
joined in.\u00c2\u00a0 How long could we keep this ruse up?\u00c2\u00a0 Till she came down on us?<\/p>\n
She wouldn’t leave.\u00c2\u00a0 It’s like we were buddies now.\u00c2\u00a0 It was interminable, I
felt like I was twisting slowly in the wind.<\/p>\n
But then she said her goodbyes, and marched off down the hill.<\/p>\n
I’d like to tell you we pulled down our pants and resumed our actions, but
that’s not what happened.\u00c2\u00a0 After debating whether the Ranger could have possibly
thought we were peeing, I mean there was no way she didn’t see us with our
pants down, we hiked back down the trail to the lake.\u00c2\u00a0 Where you could see the
trout swimming in the water.\u00c2\u00a0 Where you could look up and see mountains of a
size not extant in Vermont.\u00c2\u00a0 Sheer walls coming right down to the lakeshore.<\/p>\n
It was a long hike back down.\u00c2\u00a0 Hours.\u00c2\u00a0 With spectacular views of the Birds Of
Prey and the Gore Range.<\/p>\n
I felt like this was where I belonged.\u00c2\u00a0 That I needed to spend more time
here.\u00c2\u00a0 I couldn’t wait until winter came, when I could slide down these slopes.\u00c2\u00a0
Chuckling as I rode up the lift thinking of our summer adventure. <\/p>\n
<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
My mother wants to sell the house in Vermont. I don’t know what to do with the past.\u00c2\u00a0 Oh, I own it, but is it still part of me.\u00c2\u00a0 Who I used to be, am I still the same person? I didn’t go to the house in Vermont for fifteen years.\u00c2\u00a0 I couldn’t.\u00c2\u00a0 The last […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-110","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-life"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p96vPs-1M","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/110","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=110"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/110\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=110"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=110"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lefsetz.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=110"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}