The reason Imus lost his gig was not because he did something illegal, but because he offended advertisers.  Oh sure, one could say he offended listeners too, but how many of those ranting and raving about his language listened to his show to BEGIN WITH?

Bottom line, Imus has fans.  And now those fans are shit out of luck.

Maybe Imus will take his money and go home.  But that’s not the American story.  America is about rehabilitation.  And, Al Campanis had no fans.  There’s a market for Imus.  But where?

Not on terrestrial radio.  The usual suspects are too scared.

But how about the wild west of satellite radio?  It’s a natural home for the I-Man.

But all the spin says he’s not gonna go.  Because satellite has advertisers too.  But not enough to make a difference.  Who needs the FRIENDS of Oprah, who needs to build from scratch when you can start with a legend, who brings HIS OWN AUDIENCE!

That’s what Sirius did with Howard Stern.  And it was a master stroke, without Howard Sirius would already be bankrupt.

But now it’s XM that’s in trouble.  The service has got no buzz.  XM needs to be dangerous, it needs to leave a mark, it needs Imus.

Now chances are if Imus resurfaces on satellite, he’ll go to Sirius, after all he’s got a preexisting relationship with Mel Karmazin.  But if XM loses Imus and the merger doesn’t happen…  How is the service going to recover?  Read today’s "Wall Street Journal", there IS no radio talent left out there, nobody XM can put on the airwaves to counter Imus and his audience.  Imus is one of the last best players.  Along with Tom Joyner.  Put Adam Carolla on satellite and you’ll get a big yawn.  Put Imus on, and imagine the PRESS!

Oh, you know Mel will weasel.  Say it’s got nothing to do with content, but feeding demand.  And how can you battle with a service that’s got so many edgy voices to begin with, from Eminem to even Martha Stewart.  But can XM thread this needle?

Sirius is Howard Stern, XM is..?

This is XM’s final bite at the apple, will they fuck it up?

You know if there were no merger pending, they’d be all over Imus.  But this is what consolidation brings you.  BOTH services can keep Imus at arm’s length, since he’s got nowhere else to go.  Like Clear Channel’s gonna make a deal with him.  That’s the fallacy of Mel Karmazin’s theory about competition.  There’s no podcast market, Imus isn’t gonna make it on iPods, and he’s too dangerous for terrestrial radio conglomerates to make a deal.  Oh, he could syndicate station by station, but what hard work when he can instantly reach the whole country, MORE of the landscape than he presently does, if he goes to satellite.

And now you know why the satellite services got into trouble to begin with.  Competition, outspending each other.  That’s why they want the merger.  To pay people like Imus LESS!  Imus fits satellite the way "The Sopranos", "Entourage" and "Big Love" fit HBO.  Stuff so edgy that you’ve got to keep it out of the reach of FCC oversight.

These duplicitous fucks in satellite radio want to deny a fair price for talent, and want to deny listeners the content they desire.  That’s what this merger is all about.

But maybe there’s a chance that the merger won’t happen.  As insurance, Imus must go to XM.

It’s a natural fit.  XM is in D.C., where all those politicians Imus interviews are located.  They can move him down to Washington and build him a special studio, just like Sirius did with Howard.  They can get endless ink.  As long as they don’t wait too long.

The tide is turning on Imus.  The backlash has begun.  Sure, what he said was bad, but what about everybody else?  He can come back.  And everybody will be watching.  They’ll want to know what he has to say, whether he’s changed, whether he’s cleaned up his act.  This is not Howard Stern leaving terrestrial at the height of his popularity, this is a niche guy most of the public didn’t pay attention to who now is the biggest story in the media.  All eyes are on him.  You’ve got to CAPITALIZE ON THIS!

Oh, I wouldn’t bring him back on the air immediately.  I’d make the deal right away, but let him serve a suspension.  Then I’d rehabilitate his image, get him in "People", all over the TV talk shows.  Retaining his edge, his personality, but saying he fucked up and certain things are beyond the pale.  And then, he’ll be on XM and the media will cover everything he says.  And thereafter, XM will have an identity.  As the Imus station.  They’ll stand for something.  Sure, in a perfect world they could stand for something better, but they’ve fumbled the ball till now.  They could have been the music service, but they never got that message across.  Instead they’ve got Snoop who’ll play for anybody who’ll pay, an old coot fired from NPR and Oprah’s buddies and baseball.  Baseball’s a good one, but what if you don’t LISTEN to baseball?  You’ve got to have something more.  You’ve got to have Imus.  You’ve got to take the ball from Sirius.  You’ve got to get the mo.

This is XM’s defining moment.  If they don’t get Imus and the merger doesn’t happen, they’re toast, they’re a distant also-ran.

Now’s the time to throw the Hail Mary pass.  Does XM have the balls?